The simple truth is that you need to be more aware of what you’re leaving for other people to hear. Sure, this doesn’t always register as a priority for users, but it’s never too late to reassess your greeting. a. Reading/Speaking in the Imperfect Tone: Tone is absolutely everything. Users don’t want to come off as being too nice, as it sounds insincere, or being too terse, as it can be interpreted as being rude. That being said, striking the right balance is absolutely essential. Your greeting exists as its own entity, and therefore, it should NOT rely on callers’ familiarity with you. Instead, it needs to appeal to the masses. As such, your inflection, i.e. the way you state your name and directions, needs to be both welcoming and firm. b. Injecting Humor & Insincerity: While humor/light heartedness can be welcoming, it can also convey a sense of informality, insincerity, and ultimately unprofessionalism. Why, because you’re not there to lend your humor or to contextualize. Instead, you’re assuming the caller has a working knowledge of your personality to ground the message. Though this might not sound like it’s all that terrible—it can be detrimental. As stated above, one should NEVER rely on a caller’s familiarity with you. Instead, aim to appeal to the masses. Humor is ultimately subjective, meaning not everyone has the same tastes; therefore, someone is bound to be turned off by a quirky or off-color remark. While implementing a light-hearted or even tongue and cheek tone can work, it’s just a really bad idea.
2. Hello, you have reached the office of [your name]; I will be out of my office starting on [date] and will be returning on [date]. You can call me when I return or leave a brief message. If this is an emergency I can be reached on my cell, which is [your number].

These work voicemail greetings are for the work phone that you and only you use. They’re highly effective because they help you establish a relationship straight from the voicemail. Or they help you share an important update in a simple, straightforward way.
Consider for a moment how your phone is currently being answered. Professional courtesy is quite often not the standard for many college students. An abrupt "Yeah!" could be listed among the more courteous greetings. The more outrageous remarks will often buy you a major black mark in the professionalism category—even if it was your roommate answering your phone and acting crazy. A simple "This is ____" is always a pleasant change for a college student call. Make the change today, before the next (or first) employer phone call. If you have a landline, you should also encourage your roommate to do the same.