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Hi! I’m not here right now, I seem to have broken my tomatoes…You wouldn’t happen to have any tomato paste on you, would ya?

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Of course, your phone rang because someone wanted to get in touch. They got your voicemail because you were busy or just not there. If you section off a block of your day to check voicemails, let the caller know so they can expect a time for you to return their call. People …
After hours of brainstorming and countless redos, area man Tom Fulton finally recorded the perfect joke voicemail that no other person will ever bother listening to. .

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If they don’t leave a message, you’ll never know who called. Some people may assume they should just call back later. But if you prefer to get back to them at your leisure, encourage them to leave a message.
-Hey you all, thanks for calling me today. It will be super nice if you would leave me a special and kind message so I’m encouraged to call you back.

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If this were the best of all possible worlds, I could come to the phone right now, but I can't, so if you could leave your name and number, I'd appreciate it.
Alpha Centauri Space Station. Commander Marlin can't come to the phone right now. He's either saving the universe from some dread, unnamed peril, or perhaps taking a nappie. Leave your name and number after the beep and he will return your call.

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To get a better experience, go to one of these sites and get the latest version of your preferred browser: Setup Professional Voicemail Greetings on iPhone With Examples: Personal, Business and Busy

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Funny Voicemail Messages That’ll Tickle Your Callers’ Funny Bone. There is plenty of room for being creative. You can always modify and personalize voicemail messages depending on your sense of humor. Keep it light and simple! • As long as phones can ring and eyes can see, leave a message, and I’ll get back to thee.

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    Hello you are talking to a machine; I am capable of receiving messages. My owner your name here does not need siding windows or a hot tub, and her carpets are clean. Hello, your name summer home. Leave your message at the tone.

    You’re growing tired. Your eyelids are getting heavy. You feel very sleepy now. You are gradually losing your willpower and your ability to resist suggestions. When you hear the tone you will feel helplessly compelled to leave your name, number, and a message.
    1. 911, what’s your emergency? Imagine you saying this when a call comes in. Just don’t let the other person say anything and barge in. It will make the other person laugh out loud.

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    Voices.com connects you with over 200,000 voice talents. The artist will send you an audition and an estimated quote to complete the work. Once you listen to all auditions, you select your talent to begin the project.

    You could use this website as a free voice over generator for narrating your videos in cases where don't want to use your real voice. You can also adjust the pitch of the voice to make it sound younger/older, and you can even adjust the rate/speed of the generated speech, so you can create a fast-talking high-pitched chipmunk voice if you want to.
    Traditionally, businesses send out greeting cards or eGreeting cards during the holiday season. While this is a great approach, you shouldn't wait around for the winter holidays to tell let your clients know you're thinking of them! Keeping in touch with your clients throughout the year is a... 7 Elements of a Real Estate Professional's Voicemail Greeting May 17, 2012 Juli Durante real estate, script samples, greetings

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    Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.

    49. Hello, you’ve reached the customer service team for [X company]. Our representatives are currently unavailable, but if you leave your name and a callback number, someone will get back to you shortly.
    I guess I’m a little like a cat in that way. I’m a call screener. If you’re my friend and you’re reading this, please understand I don’t screen your calls. Just everyone else’s.

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    17. "Hello! You've gotten the voicemail of [your name]. Leave your name, contact info, and the answer to the eternal question ‘Which came first, the chicken or the egg?' Anyone who gets it right will receive a call back."

    Being reincarnated as an answering machine is the pits. Keep your karma clean by leaving your name, number, message, and the time that you called.
    What is the recorded message that the seller listens/responds to when s/he calls the number on your postcard?

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Voice mail is only impersonal if you make it that way. One way to help increase the effectiveness of voice mail is to change your greeting at least weekly if not daily. Your greeting should let the caller know who they have reached, what is the persons status ( out of the office, in the office but in meetings etc), when the caller can expect to

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Spice up your phones with these funny answering machine messages I've put in for you guys. Download: Click on icon next to each track or the 'FULL BOARD' button to add to your cart Per Track: $0.99 or FULL BOARD $4.99. Singing, Coca-Cola Version. Spice Girls. Having Sex, Ahhh. Marvin The Martian. Mission Impossible

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Today I've decided to end our friendship, but I realized that you know all of my darkest secrets, so we will have to continue this relationship till the end of time. Leave a message at the beep.

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