Hi, you have reached (names) voicemail. If you want money or to sell us something, we a) gave at the office, b) already have it, or c) don’t want it. If you are a …
09 Hey, I’m available right now but can’t find my phone. Kindly leave a message and I will call you back as soon as I get it. This cute message will help your callers know you aren’t close to your cell phone. They’ll be reassured that once you get their message, you’ll call them back.

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Not sure if this is real or not (and either is snopes, see below). But, it sure is funny. Happy Monday! EDIT: Try this link. This is where I got it from, I didn't try the one below and it apparently doesn't work: Claim: Voicemail message describes a confrontation between a male motorist and four women after a minor traffic accident.

Don't mess with Bible-totin' old ladies.. Read this little explanation and then listen to the voicemail. You just have to laugh with the guy. On a recent Spurs trip, we were asking one of our sponsors who works at Jack in the Box for some funny stories or experiences with the company. The funniest story he had was when an operations manager was late for a meeting and called his boss to tell him he was running late. As he was leaving the voice mail message, he witnessed an accident and went on to provide "play by play" of the incident. After telling us the story, he promised to send us a copy of the voice mail and here it is. This is the actual voice mail message. It was passed along and forwarded so many times within Jack in the Box; it crashed their voice mail server. Origins: In one memorable episode of the 1970s television sitcom All in the Family, Archie Bunker is involved in a minor traffic accident and, eager to cash in on the incident, rushes out and engages a Jewish lawyer to sue the other party. However, after conferring with the defendant's attorney, Archie's lawyer advises him that he has http://www.snopes.com/autos/graphics/fight.gif no case, as the other side's witnesses are too strong. There's an old legal precept, he informs Archie: "You can't beat a station wagon full of nuns." Perhaps Archie Bunker couldn't beat a station wagon full of nuns, but according to a circulating audio clip, an Impala full of Bible-toting middle-aged women could beat (literally!) the motorist who ran into them. We present the recording for your listening enjoyment through [url="http://www.snopes.com/autos/audio/jackbox.mp3"]this (http://home.swbell.net/kf5tv/voicemail.mp3) link. The file size of the clip is over 4MB, so please be patient while it downloads. As to the questions of whether the account given above is an accurate explanation of the origins of this audio clip, and whether the traffic incident described actually took place, we have to leave them as "Undetermined" for now. A inquiry posed to the corporate offices of Jack in the Box restaurants produced the following response: Thank you for your inquiry. The message that has been in circulation is an actual voice mail message. The incident occurred 5-6 years ago in Texas. I'm not sure how the recording got outside the company or if the employee still works for Jack in the Box, but the recording periodically re-surfaces on the radio and the internet. Even if this explanation is accurate (i.e., the clip originated as a message left on a Jack in the Box employee's voicemail), it doesn't preclude the possibility that the accident described never took place, and the recording was just a prank one employee pulled on a co-worker. Be Part Of Our Story! creative funny voicemail greetings Hey sugar, you call this number often? I bet you have answering machines bothering you all the time. Yes indeedy. Why don't you give me a call sometime and we can listen to some old recordings. I might even play my beep for you. funny voicemail greetings to do Being reincarnated as an answering machine is the pits. Keep your karma clean by leaving your name, number, message, and the time that you called. common professional voicemail greetings Website: https://talkroute.com/12-fun-professional-business-voicemail-greetings/ Contact Us If you’re looking for funny voicemail messages to leave on your answering machine or cell phone, then here are some of the best examples to try. We had a contest to find the most hilarious voicemail messages to make us laugh and thought you might want to try a couple out yourself. Brought to you by Best Answering Service. Send Message Create an account. I agree to the license terms. Sign Up You already have an account? Login here. how to save voice message from messenger 8. "Hi, you've reached [your name]. I'm unable to come to the phone right now. But if you leave your name, number, and a short message, I'll be sure to call back. Funny Ringtones for mobile phone (Funny melodies and sounds). Download free mp3 ringtones to your Android cell phone - FreeTone.org 4. Provide your voicemail system's password. You will be prompted to enter the passcode to your voicemail account, if you have set one (which, hopefully, you have). 10. Hello, you’ve reached [your company]. We’re sorry to have missed your call. Please leave a brief message including your name, number, and reason for calling and a member of our team will get back to you within one business day. 3. Have Some Fun. Oftentimes, your voicemail greeting is the first impression a caller gets of your personality, your brand, and your business. And as the old adage reminds us, first impressions are everything. Just because it’s your business voicemail, doesn’t mean you have to sound like a robot. But then the bag flies open and among the contents that fall out is a bible. So she pick’s it up and starts to pummel the man with that too. ! best voicemail funny voicemail mental health hotline short professional voicemail greetings Close Project funny greetings happy birthday iPhone wallpapersiPhone ringtonesAndroid wallpapersAndroid ringtonesCool backgroundsiPhone backgroundsAndroid backgrounds Home Q&A Physics Math Chemistry Biology Programming Arts History Business Language Spanish English Tips Review Blog 9. Queue Callback Message. What the caller hears when they request a callback from the queue. Sample Scripts: “You have requested to have the next available agent call you back from the queue. 8. "Hi, you've reached [your name]. I'm unable to come to the phone right now. But if you leave your name, number, and a short message, I'll be sure to call back. 3. Funny Examples of Voicemail Messages. These can be used to play tricks on people on April fools day or for any other reason. Use with discretion. If you don't have a time machine, please leave a message and I'll get back with you in the future. Listen to Funny Voicemail Greetings, Answering Machine Messages & Pa Announcements by Worldwide Talent Group on Apple Music. Stream songs including "After Hours You're Hosed", "After Hours You're out of Luck" and more. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Hi. Hello! A is for academics, B is for beer. Hi. Hi! This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought-recording device. Hello, you are talking to a machine. Please make a note of it. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back. Hang on a second while I get a pencil. Open a drawer and shuffle stuff around. OK, what would you like me to tell me? Odoo pos android Fail2ban cockpit How to count emails in outlook Oscam trunk Sheikh mahira dubai Unit 2 lesson 14 solving equivalent ratio problems answer key Epad tab firmware Nikgapps core Asus vivobook 15 x512da upgrade ssd Tanzania 18 telegram channel Kubota power beyond kit Instadub forum Synchronized skating 2020 Datura uses How to activate windows 10 offline Jio phone vpn Citroen gs workshop wiring diagram diagram base website wiring Audio mic splitter not working funny voicemail setup what is the proper greeting for purim a funny voicemail message Close Project best voicemail examples “How do you leave an idiot in suspense? Leave a message, and I’ll get back to you… Bye!” how to set up a personal voicemail greeting 10. Max Wait Time Reached Message. What the caller hears when they have been waiting in the queue for the maximum amount of time. Sample Scripts: “You have exceeded the waiting limit for this queue. Funny Answering Machine Messages. "Hi, we aren't in at the moment, if you are trying to sell us something please start speaking now and hang up at the beep, everyone else start speaking at the beep and hang up when you've finished." Â "Hi, you have reached the Borg collective. Pressing 3 is optional. This is David. Please leave one. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. I am not in the office today; I may not be in tomorrow.Need some ideas for funny voicemail greetings? Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers:. Our previous post on funny voicemail greetings got so much attention, we thought we'd continue…. Samsung T105 Pre Paid Cell Phone For Tracfone Black 9 99 Samsung Samsung Phone Cases Phone Cases Car 26. Hello, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m either on another call, on a top secret mission to Mars, or I’ve just stepped away from my desk for the day. Leave a message after the tone and I’ll call you back tomorrow or in about seven months. best voicemail recording for business whats a good personal voicemail greeting funny ps4 voice message Close Project personal voicemail greeting ideas Good day. You’ve reached the residence of the O’Meara family on 5th and Oak. We regret not being able to attend to your call. However, if you choose to, you may leave your contact information at the tone, and we shall be most happy to return your call as soon as we are able. Thank you for your call. Include the name of the individual, family or business State you are sorry you cannot get to the phone Ask them to leave their contact information behind Thank them for their call Informal Voicemail Greetings Hi! I’m not here right now, I seem to have broken my tomatoes…You wouldn’t happen to have any tomato paste on you, would ya? Website: https://classroom.synonym.com/christian-ideas-for-voice-mail-messages-12082608.html When leaving your voicemail and phone number, do not say, "Please call me back at ..." Nothing sounds more like a salesperson making a cold call then saying, "please call me back at...". Legal InformationTerms of UsePrivacy PolicyDo Not Sell My Personal InformationCalifornia Privacy Notice Pillsbury Doughboy Obituary Calvin & Hobbes Snowman Cartoons Excerpts from Court Reporters Funny Easter Cartoons UPS Pilot Complaints Funny Computer Cartoons Colorado Barbie New Business Terms Funny Christmas Cartoons Finding Nemo End-of-the-Year Evaluations Asterisk Ian McKellen on Extras – Ricky Gervais More Practical Jokes Beautiful Celebrities Gone Obese Mouse Virus Funny Police Comments Practical Jokes Dove Evolution Spoof Can You Read This Blog Contact Us Home Funny Stuff Pillsbury Doughboy Obituary Calvin & Hobbes Snowman Cartoons Excerpts from Court Reporters Funny Easter Cartoons UPS Pilot Complaints Funny Computer Cartoons Colorado Barbie New Business Terms Funny Christmas Cartoons Finding Nemo End-of-the-Year Evaluations Asterisk Ian McKellen on Extras – Ricky Gervais More Practical Jokes Beautiful Celebrities Gone Obese Mouse Virus Funny Police Comments Practical Jokes Dove Evolution Spoof Can You Read This About Funny Biz Staff Team Blog Contact Us Home Funny Voicemail Messages Posted at 01:35h in Technology by Dave Carlson 0 Comments Funny answering machine or voicemail messages to try. Posted by hotcrowd on August 6, 2009. Try a clever message for your phone. These are a hoot! Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn’t lend me enough money. funny voicemail pranks funny voicemail greetings script best funny voicemail Close Project funny voicemail voices Prospecting refers to the process through which a business attracts new clients. This, surprisingly, is not as easy as it may sound. It requires you . . . The best resumes stand out because of choice of words, not because of qualifications. Everyone who... Funny - Humorous voicemail greetings for your amusement and use. Today I've decided to end our friendship, but I realized that you know all of my darkest secrets, so we will have to continue this relationship till the end of time. Hey, how are you? Just wanted to let you know that I'm not here so leave a message! -Hello. All of our operators are busy right now, but if you’ll leave your name, telephone number, a brief message, and the time you called, we’ll get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you and have a pleasant day. If you are selling any product or service, or requesting charitable donations, please press 2 and hang up now. Otherwise, press 3 and leave your message now. Pressing 3 is optional. This is David. Please leave one.We had a contest to find the most hilarious voicemail messages to make us laugh and thought you might want to try a couple out yourself. Keeping such hilarious greetings will not only make you feel good, but your callers will also enjoy listening to them. Would you like to write for us? Well, we're looking for good writers who want to spread the word. how to create a personal voicemail greeting how to set up a personal voicemail greeting what's the proper greeting for passover Close Project funny voicemail to call “Hey there, this is [name]. You’ve reached [XYZ company]. Unfortunately, I’m currently away from the office and am traveling in [place]. I won’t be back in the office until [date] and I will get in touch with you then. 10. "Hello, you've reached [X company]. We can't take your call right now, but please leave your name, contact information, and reason for reaching out, and one of our team members will be in touch within 24 hours." A good cell phone voice mail greeting is clear, courteous and to the point. Enunciate, don't mumble, to make it as easy as possible for those with poor hearing or bad connections to be able to hear your greeting. Be polite, and save swearing for the conversation, if applicable. Don't Go Crazy. By Michele Meleen Counselor. Funny msg ideas for friend. This is not a voice mail; this is a telepathic thought-recording device. From farts to turds and from banter to hits below the belt — BFFs, besties, best friends and bae are on the chopping block here. Best Top 10 Answering Machine Messages. 10. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished. 9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. A funny voicemail greeting is one of those things that seems like a good idea...until you hear it time and time again. For business and professional life, funny voicemail greetings just doesn't make sense. If you're expecting an important call, or trying to impress someone you certainly won't... 5 Steps to Creating an Audio eGreeting Card December 06, 2011 Juli Durante marketing, tips, greetings professional but funny voicemail greetings custom business voicemail greetings funny voicemail greetings soundboard Close Project X