Funny; Funny Voicemail Funny Voicemail sorry but nobodys available to answer you call at this time.if you'd like to leave a message please wait for the beep, then press #, then so on..great doe anyone know how to have the phone say the name as it is on the contact list? At 6/4/10, 4:47 AM, *Anonymous* said
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Phone Solicitor Discouragement: The Long-Winded Voicemail Message. November 12, 2014. November 12, 2014 by funny. By pure, ridiculous serendipity, I found a way to almost bring a stop to phone solicitor calls, a major nuisance for dinosaurs who wish to hang onto their land lines.
So there ya go. Leave a comment below and you'll get to download my nifty, we-buy-houses voicemail script—easy peasy, macaroni-and-cheesy. And don’t forget to be awesome.
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“Hello. *your name*’s answering machine is broken; this is his/her refrigerator. You can leave a message, but please say it really slowly, so I can write it on a post-it note and stick it to myself.”
We are no longer allowing posts or threads that deny the existence of Covid-19. Members have lost loved ones to this virus and are grieving. As a Christian site, we do not need to add to the pain of the loss by allowing posts that deny the existence of the virus that killed their loved one. Future post denying the Covid-19 existence, calling it a hoax, will be addressed via the warning system. Join or Sign In Congregational forums are now Christians Only New rule about videos Changes in the Life Stages section Prayer banner Covid-19 Denial (Narrator's voice There Dale sits, reading a magazine.Suddenly the telephone rings! "Hi, I'm not home right now but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep." Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Her answering machine just eloped with her tape deck, so I'm stuck with taking her calls. My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you." You are gradually losing your willpower and your ability to resist suggestions. When you hear the tone you will feel helplessly compelled to leave your name, number, and a message." ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Once this is done, our computers will be able to use the sound of *your* voice for literally thousands of illegal and immoral purposes. However our staff of professional extortionists will contact you in the near future to further explain the benefits of our service, and to arrange for your schedule of payment.
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Simply speak into your phone or computer while recording a greeting with your business phone service. If you need to create your own audio file, the voice memo app on your phone should do fine.
“I’m answering this phone for my friend who tells me it’s your nature to hang up and not leave a message, but I should remind you that nature is what we are put on this earth to rise above. So please, leave a message at the sound of the beep… for the sake of anthropology.”
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I know that in some cases you’re going to have a budget you have to work with for your voicemail greeting ideas. If you are looking to hire a voice talent chances are you have a budget in mind.
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2. The Mystery. A mysterious voicemail leaves the listener wondering what the call is about and plays to our fear of loss and FOMO. What if something’s wrong w/ my account?
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To get a better experience, go to one of these sites and get the latest version of your preferred browser: Setup Professional Voicemail Greetings on iPhone With Examples: Personal, Business and Busy
Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us. The new number is Yes, same number.
A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future....
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Customer Service and Operations at OpenPhone. Founder of SOUL House artist showcase in the GTA. Art is life! Dee Lee 1 year ago Reply
Mar 14, 2021 - Explore Eric Alexander's board "cell phone humor", followed by 3292 people on Pinterest. See more ideas about humor, bones funny, phone humor.
10. Nobody Misses The Clever Answering Machine Message. Connect Your Team All Under One Number, No Matter If They Are Working Down The Hall Or Across The Country.
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When you want callers to leave a message, make sure your voicemail greeting indicates that. Be sure to keep your greeting short and direct, and include the info you want to capture.
-Hello, this is ________. I’m not home right now, but I can take a message. Hang on a second while I get a pencil. (Open a drawer and shuffle stuff around.) OK, what would you like me to tell me?
Use a cute love quote to surprise your man with a sweet message or come up with your own creative idea. Movies are the perfect place to find cute love quotes and sayings because every word in the script is carefully crafted for an emotional response.
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Leave your name, number and text message after beeping.Oh, please wait for me to call you back.Bye.Hello...My name is the fridge (your name.He/she is not at home to answer your call now.To leave a message for him/her, speak very slowly so I can leave a message with the help of these fridge magnets.
Useless Facts [140+ Facts You Can Impress Your Friends]89 Church Bulletin Bloopers (to Make You Smile)Things to Ponder [66 hilarious things to ponder about!]21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) MessagesIf Microsoft Built Cars36 Stuff To Ponder [They are all weird and hilarious]17 Weird Library Reference Questions12 completely obvious and useless quotesCursed McDonald’s Fries CosplayEmployees must stop crying before returning to work
“How do you leave an idiot in suspense? Leave a message, and I’ll get back to you… Bye!”
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Hi, you’ve reached Customer Service. We are busy assisting other customers at the is time. Please leave a detailed message with your order number or customer ID, the reason for your call, and the best number to reach you. A Service Specialist will return your call as soon as possible.
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“Hello. *your name*’s answering machine is broken; this is his/her refrigerator. You can leave a message, but please say it really slowly, so I can write it on a post-it note and stick it to myself.”
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4. Liam Neeson Threatens and Delights Your Callers. Liam Neeson has been acting for decades but it was his recent role in the hit movie Taken that caught the attention of a younger audience.
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If you are hearing this tape, then I'm not here now. Please leave your name, number, D.O.B, address, social security number, age, height, weight, how many children you have, what sex you are, your mother’s maiden name, and the date and time when you called me. If you are still listening, then whatever you have to say must be very important. Please leave a message after the beep. advice (8) animals (1) cars (1) chain (1) cool (14) cute (13) food (7) funny (219) game (1) gender (1) gross (9) health (6) history (3) hollywood (2) interesting (45) jokes (68) nature (4) office (2) picture (14) sappy (8) science (6) stories (2) stupid (21) travel (7) video (22) warning (7) women (2) Archive April (3) November (4) November (3) March (1) February (1) January (2) December (6) November (2) October (2) September (3) June (2) March (1) January (1) August (5) June (2) May (19) April (6) March (5) February (10) January (11) December (15) November (14) October (17) September (18) August (21) July (30) June (29) May (23) April (31) March (4)
Leaving a voicemail can still be a good way to grab the attention of a potential new customer. However, when it comes to leaving a voicemail, you only have a few seconds to actually grab the listener's attention. Most salespeople screw this up by leaving too much information and making themselves sound like a salesperson, which is the kiss of death when leaving a voicemail.
Are you bored of listening, as well as recording standard voice-mail messages in your answering machine? If so, scroll for some really funny voice-mail greetings, which will surely bring a smile on your, as well as your caller's face.
I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember. I'd appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and telling me something about myself. Thanks.
The voicemail function allows the caller to leave a message in case you are busy. It informs the caller of your status and assures that the message will be heard. For instance, good voicemail greetings at corporate firms create a pleasant impression on the caller’s mind or a hilarious voicemail can make someone’s day. Parents can be assured that an urgent message will be delivered once you get access to your phone.
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You’ve reached the general mailbox for Case Manufacturing. We are located in Fort Worth at 600 Everman Parkway, just East of I-35 in the Worth Industrial Park. Our office is open to serve you Monday through Friday from 8 am until 5 pm. For more information on our products and manufacturing capabilities, visit Case Manufacturing Inc dot com. Our website also allows you to request a quote and place your orders online. All other inquiries, please leave a message, and we will return your call as soon as possible.
This is name. If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. When I get back, and can listen to what you say, I will call you back but on a less hectic day! Help me please!!!! Just speak into this box, when it makes that weird sound, and I will be able to get out and call you back!
Our users have volunteered their best greetings that…. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed. We guarantee that Ninja Number will help grow your business. January 25, So leave a message.
Don't create any unnecessary complications by asking someone to call you back at the office when you're calling from your cell phone. Today I've decided to end our friendship, but I realized that you know all of my darkest secrets, so we will have to continue this relationship till the end of time.
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Not many might consider it, but your business voicemail greeting is probably more important than you think. Now, we probably all hate recording those generic voicemail greetings at home or on our cell phones. But when it comes to our business – a generic, lifeless robotic greeting probably just won’t cut it. And thanks to the software that comes with your business VoIP solution, it is easier than ever to change your greetings on the fly.
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Not everyone is not going to return your voicemail messages. However, by using these techniques you will certainly get a lot more callbacks than if you were to use the normal long winded and weak salesperson voicemail that is left by so many salespeople. Good luck! Win more clients by creating impressive digital business proposals, price quotes, and contracts using ClientPoint Software
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2. Interactive Voice Response (IVR) Greeting. The greeting callers hear when they enter your IVR. Sample Scripts: “For English press 1. Para Español presione el número 2.”
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39. Hi, this is [your name]. I’m not at my desk right now, so leave a message and I’ll call you back within 24 hours.
I don't actually have an answering machine or voicemail or whatever, but I would have had this one: Hallo?
Website: https://www.macrynvoicegreetings.com/macryn-voicemail-greetings-sample-scripts/
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If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my friends, you owe me money.
Hello, you have reached the automated answering service for (your name), your message will be answered to in the order in which it was received, your message is number 8,243, please hold, your message is important to me.
Hello! Thanks for calling [LinkedPhone. We’re currently tied up assisting other entrepreneurs & small businesses at the moment]. But please leave your name, number, and the reason for your call and we will get back to you as soon as possible. We look forward to working with you. Thank you.
A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So leave a message.
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5. Hello. I’m home right now but cannot find the phone. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it.
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If the problem persists, please report this issue to YouMail Support Team. Greeting Copied To Your Account. It will now appear inside your YouMail account under your [Greetings] tab. You can set this as your default greeting, or pick specific Contacts to hear it. Go To My Account Now.
With my cell phone in my hand and her watching her show. I asked her if she could get me a beer and she said no. Then her cell phone rang in the kitchen and she quickly got up to see what it was. My message said while you're in the kitchen can you get me a beer. I don't remember the rest
These voicemail ideas may not come so easily for some of you. And who says that finding inspiration is a bad thing. It has to be different and contain some kind of style. And to that, I would like to give you a list of messages. They are perfect alternatives when you want to add some uniqueness to your voicemail. These cool voicemail ideas given below will take the mundane effects off and leave you with fresh sounding voicemail messages.
Hello, this is Jason's voice. Jason's not here right now -- hey, haven't you ever lost YOUR voice? Well, believe you me, when I find him again, I'll have a few choice words for him. If you do too, leave them after the beep.
An excellent business voicemail greeting conveys your level of professionalism and competence while also providing your callers with a glimpse into your company’s culture and level of care. As minor as it may seem, your voicemail greeting can instill confidence and trust in your callers or it can be a cause for concern.
Hi there! You’ve reached [LinkedPhone – Where Freedom Rings!] We’re away at the moment but please leave your name, number, and let us know how we can help you. We’ll make sure the right team gets back to you within [the next 24 hours]. We appreciate your call. Thank you.
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After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. Finally get an answering machine. Now how does this thing work?
I have no idea if I’ve dialed the right number or if I’m about to leave a message for Kim Jong-il (why wouldn’t Kim Jong-il have a cellphone with a Lancaster County, PA area code?). If I’m killed tonight by snipers from North Korea, this is all your fault.
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Responding to voicemails is time-consuming. Fortunately, with the right greeting, you might be able to save yourself some hassle. If you don’t have an auto attendant, you can give callers the information they are looking for with your voicemail greeting. Of course, this means that your greeting may be a little lengthy, but that can work in your favor as callers will only stay on the line to leave a message if they still need assistance.
Then Chuck Norris will hand you over my script. Totally serious. Just try it. 😀
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