Image credit to Far Reach Inc. http://www.farreachinc.com/blog/far-reach/2015/01/08/ho-ho-oh-how-to-create-unforgettable-corporate-holiday-greetings
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Here is a list of some funny messages and greetings for answering machines. Hello. Say something quickly, I don’t have time! Hi, I am a machine. If you hate talking to me, why have you called? I am, you-know-who. Leave your, you-know-what and you-know-when. Bye bye. I am not at home but my answering machine is. You can talk to my machine for some time. I have no issues.
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HA HA HA! That was my mom's answering machine for most of my high school years!! I Loved it! The A is for... one was my boyfriends when he lived in the dorms but thankfully it's normal now! lol did you hear about the lady who was a big Tom Selleck fan ? she taped a scene from magnum which had his answering mahine on in it and used it for her machine. imagine getting Tom Selleck s voice when you called home. I do think it is kind of creepy to hear a dead person s voice because the survirors can t bear to erase the tape. i totally need to change my answering machine msg and im definately gonna use one of those!! lol those cracked me up!!! - would consider changing my message to the hynosis one. hi, i'm not here right now to talk with you. in the meantime, while you wait for my return, you can strip naked and run around in the streets yelling "buga buga buga". it won't make me respond sooner, but there will be some nice folks wearing white coats who will be happy to talk to you. Your name or email address: Do you already have an account? No, create an account now. Yes, my password is: Forums > Leisure and Society > Hobbies, Interests & Entertainment > Clean/Christian Jokes > A Whipp Media Site Contact Us Help Home Terms and Christian Forum Rules Privacy Policy
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Unexpected crises like COVID-19 can occur at any time. Here are a few example business voicemail scripts you can adapt for those unanticipated events. It’s important to incorporate key information that your clients need to know. You should also add a human touch by expressing your goodwill for them and their families.
Oh, one more thing;Where do you say you live?Hi.I need some money if this is my parents.If this is my friend, I will give you your money.If this is a hot girl, don't listen to what I said before.
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24. Hello, you’ve reached [business name]. Every call is important to us, so please leave a brief message that includes your name and phone number so a member of our customer success team can call you back as quickly as possible.
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Thanks for all the great advice you share on the Manners Mentor blog! Here is my situation. I hope you can help. Sometimes I’m good at leaving a voicemail that’s to the point, but most of the time I feel like I’m a babbling idiot. I never know how much information to leave. How much is too much? How much isn’t enough, especially in a professional setting? I would love to know your thoughts on this. Best wishes for a wonderful week!
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Don't create any unnecessary complications by asking someone to call you back at the office when you're calling from your cell phone. Today I've decided to end our friendship, but I realized that you know all of my darkest secrets, so we will have to continue this relationship till the end of time.
You might not be the kind of person who wants customers to go through long voicemails. If that sounds like you, here are a couple of short and sweet voicemail greetings that you can use to get your message across!
Hi this is Sonny and Attie's machine. Medicare didn’t send us enough money this month so we are out robbing the liquor store. If this is the police we are just napping.
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3. Voicemail Greetings For Business. You’ve reached (insert company name.) All of our team members are busy at the moment, but someone will return your call within (insert timeframe) if you’ll be so kind as to leave your name, number, and a brief message.
Hello? Hello? Hellooo? I'm sorry, you're gonna have to speak up, I can't hear you. That's because I'm not home. Leave a message.
Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, mostly on top. I like doing it left to right, very slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get back to you.
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34. Hello, this is [your name]. I’m currently out of the office celebrating [X holiday]. I’ll be back on [X date], so leave a quick message and I’ll be sure to return your call when I get back. Have a happy [holiday]!
In closing, this guide should highlight that the options for professional, friendly, interesting, impressive, and concise voicemail greetings are as broad as the imagination. Remember, the best business voicemail greetings are those that are equal parts useful to both the caller wanting a service and the recipient wanting to offer a service. So, ensure the content represents the brand and is engaging to the audience. Now, pick some favorites and give them a practice run. Related Blog Posts 5 Best VoIP Service Providers for Low-Cost International Calling in 20215 Tell-Tale Signs that Your VoIP System is Being HackedBest VoIP Providers for Making Cheap Calls to China in 20215 Google Voice Alternatives in 2021 that Add More Value to Your Business PhoneCompetitors to Vonage in 2021How To Send A Fax Through GmailOoma Login HelpmagicJack Login HelpmagicJack GO Setup: www.MJREG.com Install GuideThis Month in Telecom: January 2019
Please leave your contact info, full name, and other details and I’ll call you back once I’m back in the [city/country/area]. Ciao for now!”
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But then the bag flies open and among the contents that fall out is a bible. So she pick’s it up and starts to pummel the man with that too.
Top 13 Professional Voicemail Greetings – Examples, Scripts, Samples, Audio Recordings
How are you doing?We must meet this weekend.How about I call you?...Hello....Hello....Who is this?Is anyone in line?....Road side cafe;You kill them, we cook them.Leave your order and we will be back.Sorry, I miss you.One of the reasons I can't make a phone call may be: a) I'm with my girl (laughs), B) I'm completely wasted and can't remember how to use the phone, or c) I just don't want to talk to you.
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5. Trekkies Have a Fun Outgoing Message to Use. If you’re a #Trekkie or a #Trekker, this is the best of our funny voicemail greetings. Let Spock deliver your outgoing message to all of your callers.
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Various messages for using with my cellphone voicemail. - I certify that I am over 13 years old. - I agree to the privacy policy and the terms of usage. Membership is free, secure and easy.
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"Originally posted by Katsumoru: And my dad is an astronaut and gave my car a rocket engine.It's not bull****, just too fast to see." "Originally posted by Menace: my dad works for nasa and has a laser detector that reflects the laser back at the cop and makes his gun explode." "Originally posted by ClawHammer: STI's are handed down by god himself, NOTHING is faster then an STI."
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9. Hi, this is [your name], [your job title] at [your company]. I’m currently away from my desk, but please leave a message with your name, number, and reason for calling so I can get back to you in a timely manner. See Also: 50% of Business Owners Over 50 Back Trump's National Emergency Declaration
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This is funny! I can’t come to the phone right now because I’m down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of twenty-dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handiwork, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone.
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Voicemail is a wondrous invention that can truly define ‘godsend’. It gives you the option of keeping annoying people at bay, without being outright rude. It only seems fair then, to return the favor by spicing up your voicemail greeting. Voicemail Ideas • I’m not …
This is a great message. It tells me everything that could go wrong with voice messages. Where’s the name? Company? Reason for calling? Solution? Reason to call back? Couldn’t you at least get the name of the person at the front desk? This message is an automatic delete!
Have a positive attitude while recording your voicemail greeting — it will carry through in your voice. If you find it difficult to convey positivity over a phone system, try smiling while you’re recording. (We promise, you will hear a difference.)
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4. Provide your voicemail system's password. You will be prompted to enter the passcode to your voicemail account, if you have set one (which, hopefully, you have).
7 best business voicemail greetings
Virtual events are very much like many other kinds of meetings; only they take place over the internet. This technology allows visitors and businesses to collaborate, share information, connect with...
It’s imperative for any business owner and/or entrepreneur to have a professional, snappy and appropriate voicemail greeting for their business. Automated greetings will only help current customers stay in touch with you and you will create a great first impression on potential clients.
5. Road side cafe; you kill them and we’ll cook them. Leave your order and we’ll get back.
ALSO also, to answer the glaring question: Should you even have seller calls handled by voicemail rather than live answered? (my opinion and thoughts on this may surprise you).
#2 “Hey this is Bryan, leave me a message at the beep. Like you needed me to tell you that, right? I mean, how many times have you done this? You already know what to do.”
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From farts to turds and from banter to hits below the belt — BFFs, besties, best friends and bae are on the chopping block here. You talk. I'm sorry I didn't answer your call. I want to be the reason you look at your phone and smile. Zedge have thousands of ringtones for your cell phone. He could record the following: Hi! This is John Smith. Some of these quotes are designed to accommodate every feeling an individual has. Give him a reason to smile and think about you with a fun message he won't forget.
Hi, this is Ed. I'm secretly replacing Jane and Bob with dark sparkling Folger's Crystals. Leave your name, number, and a brief message and they'll call you back when they're nice and percolated. See if you can tell the difference.
Hello, this is Ron's toaster. Ron's new answering machine is in the shop for repairs, so please leave your message when the toast is done... (Cachunk!)
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The point of a voicemail greeting is to encourage your callers to leave a message. More often than not, and this is becoming more evident every day, people are just hanging up and assuming the receiver will call back. On the other hand, funny voicemail greetings keep people on the phone longer.
Two other parodies of telephone messages have been made from the telephone company by Ghtrout.
Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll be right with you.
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A phone call to your business is often the first encounter your customers and prospects have with your company. If no one is available to take the call, having the best professional voicemail greetings possible is important to leave a great first impression and to ensure that business opportunities don’t slip by.
This spam showcases around voicemail phishing Vishingwhich is a type of scam done through Voicemails. I want to be your best friend until I am too old to remember.
"Uh...had a slight weapons malfunction. But, uh, everything's perfectly all right now. We're fine. We're all fine here...now...thank you. How are you?" cromagnon, May 26, 2003 Joined: Jul 27, 2002 Messages: 1,463 You have reached the room of Matt and Brad. I am busy throwing Brad out the window (scream, quickly diminishing), so please leave a message. We had to try about 6 times before we didn't laugh while making it. Our RA came in and asked if everything was alright from my screaming.
38. Thanks for calling [company name]. We’re unable to take your call right now, but leave your details and we’ll call you right back.
My wife and I can’t come to the phone right now, but if you’ll leave your name and number we’ll get back to you as soon as we’re finished.
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