Then Chuck Norris will hand you over my script. Totally serious. Just try it. š
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Funny answering machine or voicemail messages to try. Posted by hotcrowd on August 6, 2009. Try a clever message for your phone. These are a hoot! Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didnāt lend me enough money.
You have reached the , Strategic Air Command Nuclear Missile Storage Facility. We are unable to come to the phone right now. At the tone, please leave your name, number and target or list of targets and weāll launch as soon as we can. And have a nice day.
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2. Access the dial pad. You'll need to bring up the Phone app's dial pad, as if you were going to call an actual person. To do this, tap the dial pad icon near the bottom of the screen.
25. Hello, youāve reached [your name], [job title] at [business name]. Iām sorry to have missed your call. Please leave your name, contact information, and reason for calling so I can get back to you promptly.
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No5: You know what I hate about answering machine messages? They go on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really need to say is, "We aren't in, leave a message." That's why I've decided to keep mine simple and short. I pledge to you, my caller, that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me.
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47. Hi, this is [name], [company]ās [job title]. Iām happy to help you with [task], but Iām currently away from my phone. Leave a quick message and Iāll return your call as soon as I can. Thanks!
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7. "Hello, this is [your name] at [company]. Thanks for calling. Please leave your name, number, and the reason you'd like to chat, and I'll get back to you ASAP."
Itās the way that people contact you when you are busy with other clients or customers, and cannot get to the phone. It is often the customers or clients first impression of your business or brand, you need to leave a great impression. The worst thing is for a first time caller, or even a returning customer, to get a short blurb like āLeave a message iāll call you backā. Or, just a beep after the ring.
And as the old adage reminds us, first impressions are everything. Step 2 Record a message using a friend who speaks in a deep, low, creepy voice and says "[your name] can't come to the phone.
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This is name. If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. When I get back, and can listen to what you say, I will call you back but on a less hectic day! Help me please!!!! Just speak into this box, when it makes that weird sound, and I will be able to get out and call you back!
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47. Hi, this is [name], [company]ās [job title]. Iām happy to help you with [task], but Iām currently away from my phone. Leave a quick message and Iāll return your call as soon as I can. Thanks!
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Hi! I seem to be in the room, but I canāt quite locate my phone at the moment. If you leave a message and number, Iāll ring you up whenever I find it, or if you happen to know where I left it, let me know!
-Hello, caller. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to leave your name, number, and a short message after the tone. This message will self destruct. BOOM! (not followed by a beep)
God's Voice mail lolĀ Jesus's Voice mail
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19. "Hello, you've reached [your name]. I'm currently [exploring Asia, hiking through the jungle in Costa Rica, hanging out on the beach in Bermuda] ā or more likely, [recovering from extreme jet lag, googling āAre red spiders poisonous,' or looking for SPF 150 sunscreen] and won't be back in the office until [date]. Leave your contact info and reason for calling and I'll get in touch then."
Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back. If your one of your name 's friends, you may also leave a message at the They are perfect alternatives when you want to add some uniqueness to your voicemail.
Now that you know which script to use, how do you record it? Depending on your budget and the resources available to you, you can record the script yourself, use a text-to-speech program, or hire a professional voice actor to record your greeting.
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best funny voicemail greetings
OK, so I followed all the instructions that came with the machine. I pressed all the necessary buttons. Soā¦ now what? Iā¦ amā¦ soā¦ confused. Could you pleaseā¦ beep. Hello, this is name.However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so we hope these funny voicemail greetings bring you a smile. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Just kidding, buddy. And as the old adage reminds us, first impressions are everything. Step 2 Record a message using a friend who speaks in a deep, low, creepy voice and says "[your name] can't come to the phone.
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Creating a voicemail greeting might not be fun, but with the scripts Iāve shared, you should have an easier time. No need to practice time and time again ā simply plug in your name, company title, and other details, then read it out loud to your phoneās voicemail greeting recorder. With a professional greeting, youāll continue nurturing prospects even if you donāt pick up the phone.
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Because they now know you as the contractor with the funny voicemail greeting, you already have a deeper connection with the lead than your competitors. It provides a very nice leeway into the conversation.
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Bullwinkle Hey, Rocky, somebody called while we weren't home. Watch me pull their message out of this machine! Rocky: Again? Bullwinkle: Nuthin' up my sleeve... PRESTO! [Sound of vicious dog barking, stops abruptly.]
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7. Automated And Recorded Voicemail Greetings Overview. Thank You! Callers Hear A Professionally Recorded Greeting Introducing Your Company, And Then The Caller Is Transferred Out To Speak To You Live.
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Get your FREE copy of Art's newly-revised, best-selling 190-page book, "How to Place the Successful Sales Call" mailed to you (just help with the shipping and handling). Over 10,000 sold at $29. Hundreds of word-for-word scripting and messaging examples. Claim yours today! Popular Posts Responding to āIām not interested.ā Why I Am a Maui Jim Sunglasses Customer for Life Funniest or Most Embarrassing Phone Experiences 74 How Questions You Can Use Who Should You Invite to Connect on LinkedIn? Primary Menu Home
āThis is Slappy McGee. Leave a brief message, telling me why youāre calling, and whatās in it for me. Unless youāre Boots, then DO NOT leave a message. Iām still trying to get rid of those fleas you gave me. Thanks a lot. Hashtag sarcasm.ā 8. Tooth extraction āDid you get the part about the gravy?āĀ Photo by Shutterstock
Today I've decided to end our friendship, but I realized that you know all of my darkest secrets, so we will have to continue this relationship till the end of time. Leave a message at the beep.
Hello you are talking to a machine; I am capable of receiving messages. My owner (your name here) does not need siding windows or a hot tub, and her carpets are clean. She gives to charity through the office and she doesnāt need her picture taken if your still with me please leave a message and she will get back with you.
!
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Inspirational Quotes. Leave your caller with something meaningful to think about. Mark Twain . The classic adage "when greatness calls" can be used as a funny greeting."When greatness calls, I may not be able to pick up my phone immediately, so leave a message."
Looney Tunes No Hang-ups No Hang ups Chick Hearn Telephone Answering Tape At the sound of the beep Every Excuse In the Book FurmanNet Matthew Furman Silly answering machine silly greetings messages funny answering machine greetings comedy answering machine silly voicemail silly voice mail novelty greetings funny messages for answering machines
Selection of pre-recorded phone greetings and on hold messages: In order to select your desired phone message, please follow steps 1,2 and 3 in order . Our pre-recorded message packages are available in all common audio formats (mp3 / wave / alaw / ulaw / 16bit / 18bit). Special audio formats are also available at no extra cost.
Roses are red booger's are green please leave your message on this stupid machine .
Hello, this is your local zoo. Do you like animals? We are experiencing severe problems with hot water. Would you be so kind as to allow us to bring our elephants over to your bathroom for a shower? (The most common response: "Well, sure, but my neighbor's bathroom is bigger and better equipped to handle elephants.")
Here are a few impressive Voicemail Greetings formats that we can use for our Business, and Prepare your IVR system using some free Text to speech convert online. Letās Find your Favorite one that suits your Business types like Doctors Clinic, Crunch Office, Low Office, Avaya Office, Dental Office, General Office, Leasing office, Call center, Customer Support office, Legel Office, ooma office, temporary Out of Office Voicemail.
No31:Ā I didn't take a shower today, and I might not take one tomorrow. So if you don't leave a message after the tone, you might have to deal with me in person.
Feel free to add a personal touch to make your voicemail message fun and interesting. Clients will feel reassured when they know their messages have been received and you will get back to them.
Another way to make up funny voicemail messages is to act like a device has come alive. For instance, you could say,"Hello, I'm Bob's hair dryer, and I've taken over because I'm way more interesting. If you'd like to leave a message for him and have your hair dried at the same time, just hold up the phone." Answering like an answering machine, a microwave, or refrigerator and using the functions of that device in the answer are easy ways to create a fun voicemail.
Any message you leave will be broadcast into the futureā¦. A is for academics, B is for beer. So leave a message. After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. Finally get an answering machine. Now how does this thing work? Press record button, I did that, and the light should be on. Hmmmm, I wonder what this button doesā¦ā¦. This call may be recorded or monitored for quality and training purposes. Hello you are talking to a machine; I am capable of receiving messages.
Learn about a little known plugin that tells you if you're getting the best price on Amazon. Some individuals like to create funny voicemail messages for people to hear when they call. A private voicemail box enables a person to receive telephone messages when the phone cannot be answered. Clear answers for common questions FAQs About Us Contact Us Testimonials Privacy Policy Terms and Conditions Copyright 2003 - 2021
So, I added a, you, uh, your, uh, just a pause or maybe a little chuckle in here or there just to make it sound organic. So right off the top, if we've already spoken about your house and you just need to leave a message, press pound now and leave a message after the tone. So that obviously has a practical use because if sellers call back because that's the only number that they have, maybe the second or third time, I don't want to have to make them endure the entire message before they leave us a message. And that is actually how Vumber works.
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āThis is Roxie. If youāre receiving this message, Iām probably in the linen closet, rolling on sheets and towels. Try my other phone. If you get my voicemail on that one, Iām probably in the linen closet, rolling on sheets and towels. Stop bothering me.ā
Help CFC Save the World In the top 200 of over 44,000 teams. All you need is a computer. Now folding with the help of Blazer6. taper, May 26, 2003 "Oh my God, the ringing, THE RINGING! Please, STOP THE RINGING!!! AAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!!!!" *beep* WillJ, May 26, 2003 Joined: Feb 8, 2002 Messages: 10,278 Location: Atlanta, former CSA Irish Caesar, May 28, 2003 Joined: Feb 16, 2003 Messages: 3,098 Location: -4 GMT I don't feel like answering the phone right now. If you leave a message maybe I'll get back to you...or maybe I won't. If you don't hear from me in 72 hours, I decided not to return your call. YNCS, May 28, 2003 Log in with Facebook Your name or email address: Do you already have an account? No, create an account now. Yes, my password is: Home Forums > COLOSSEUM > Humor & Jokes > Search Forums Recent Posts Account Upgrades Civ6 Civ5 Civ4 Civ3 Civ2 Civ1 Modiki Members Notable Members Current Visitors Recent Activity New Profile Posts Search titles only Posted by Member: Newer Than: Search this thread only Search this forum only Display results as threads Style Civilization VI Language English (US) Contact Us Help Home Top RSS Here are some funny answering machine messages to download and record to your answering machine. If you are not Redirected Please Click Here to Continue to the Answering Machine Messages
If you have a knack for mimicry or talking with different accents, then recording voicemail messages with the distinctive voices of politicians, actors, or actresses can also be fun. It can also be quite funny to make a reference to something that sounds like something else and then deliver a punch line. For example, you could say, "Mark and I are doing something that we can't get enough of, so we can't pick up the phone right now. So, please leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll give you a call." You might also Like Recommended Post your comments Please enter the following code: Login: Forgot password? Register:
No22: Bob here. I'm home right now, I'm just screening my calls. So start talking and if you're someone I want to speak with I'll pick up the phone. Otherwise, well, what can I say?
Ha..Ha..Ha.. I like this so much because it is funny. Here use this infographic services I am sure you will like this.
I love jokes. You want to know something I hate? Wanna hear a joke? Knock, knock! Hello, and thank you for calling the Starstripe Mental Hospital.
Dear Fear It S Time We Go Our Separate Ways Moving Forward I Will Block All Contact With You Next Time You Call My New Secret Separate Ways Dear You Call
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So there ya go. Leave a comment below and you'll get to download my nifty, we-buy-houses voicemail scriptāeasy peasy, macaroni-and-cheesy. And donāt forget to be awesome.
Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back. If your one of your name 's friends, you may also leave a message at the They are perfect alternatives when you want to add some uniqueness to your voicemail.
Back in 1997, Seinfeldās character, George Costanza, attempts to avoid a breakup call from his girlfriend and we hear his comical outgoing machine recording.
*Quick Tip* If you have your very own salon app, then make sure you mention that in your voicemail as well! For more ideas on salon app marketing, click here.
This guy is looking to get rid of his "blackish white groundhog guinea pig" and wants us to come pick it up.
We are unable to come to the phone right now. At the tone, please leave your name, number, and Master Card, Visa, or American Express account number and weāll get back to, pending credit approval.
