Then Chuck Norris will hand you over my script. Totally serious. Just try it. š
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-Hello. All of our operators are busy right now, but if youāll leave your name, telephone number, a brief message, and the time you called, weāll get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you and have a pleasant day.
The most professional voicemail message should include a formal tone and specific instructions. For example, you may say āHello, youāve reached [your name], [job title] at [business name]. Iām sorry to have missed your call. Please leave your name, contact information, and reason for calling so I can get back to you promptly.ā
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The point of a voicemail greeting is to encourage your callers to leave a message. More often than not, and this is becoming more evident every day, people are just hanging up and assuming the receiver will call back. On the other hand, funny voicemail greetings keep people on the phone longer. Given that you have already captured their attention and they have taken the time to listen to your greeting, they are certainly going to leave a message. This will not only remind you to return the call, but it also shows their interest in completing the home improvement project.
Hi. This is David. Iāve shut the ringers off on my phones and taken a sedative. As soon as I finish this recording Iām going to bed indefinitely. When I wake up Iāll play my messages. Please leave one.
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"Hello, this is John. I'm not home right now, but I can take a message. Hang on a second while I get a pencil." (background noise - open a drawer and shuffle stuff around.) "OK, what would you like me to tell me?" If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will transferred to the mother ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer. If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until someone comes on the line. If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name. If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep, or before the beep, or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you."
Our Favorite Funny Voicemail Greetings . 1. Elvis Presley Rocks Your Voicemail. Elvis appeared in 31 films, performed in 1,156 U.S. concerts and has sold more than a billion albums since the 1950ās. Why not bring his iconic voice to your personal voicemail to entertain your callers? Elvis Presley Voicemail Recording. To the tune of "Jailhouse
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āGlad you called, but I just am not able to entertain you right now. However, if you are offering to buy dinner, I may be available sooner than you think. Donāt forget to leave your name and number, so I donāt get mixed up with different offers, and go to the wrong restaurant. Bye!ā
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You want to know why? So leave a message at the beep. Hiā¦You have reached name. I am unable to answer your call. Leave your name and number and I will return your callā¦If you are a bill collector, please send me a self-addressed stamped envelope so I can send you my latest bills. Have a great day! The number you have reached is currently not in service, but when I wake up and turn my phone back on, it will be! If you are someone looking to give me a job, press 2.
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Hello. This is Chris. John and Mike arenāt here right now, but if you leave a message, theyāll get back to you as soon as they can.
This is funny! I canāt come to the phone right now because Iām down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of twenty-dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handiwork, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone.
These are very funny and interesting conversations. I did not know before an answering app or machine can answer so funny.
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No43: You have reached the offices of the planet Zarton. All our agents are busy undermining the governments of the Earth and cannot come to phone at the moment. However, your name and number can be left at the tone and a representative will gladly contact you shortly to arrange for your assimilation into the new order. Long groblint the ultimate blenstron.
Why your business voicemail greeting matters A good first impression goes a long way, and a voicemail greeting is the first impression to your business. An expertly crafted voicemail script lets your clients know youāre dependable, capable, and confident. An unprofessional voicemail script, on the other hand, can do the exact opposite.
Damn Daniel. Stop Calling My Girlfriend. Cat Facts. Donald Trump - Join My Cabinet. IRS Tax Extension. Obama Bailout. Stop Calling Me. You're Having a Baby. Stop Calling My Boyfriend. Pizza Order Confirmation. You're Having a Baby Boy.We had a contest to find the most hilarious voicemail messages to make us laugh and thought you might want to try a couple out yourself. Brought to you by Best Answering Service.
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āMom, Dadā¦ Donāt you think it would be easier to reach me if I had a cellular phone? So how about an early birthday present?ā
The moral of the story? Donāt trust old ladies! Theyāre armed and dangerous and should you see one please contact your local Garda Station.
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What kind of company do you run? A law firm may prefer more formal business voicemail greetings than a trendy retail store, for example.
If you are dyingā¦ well that is not our problem and we cannot do anything about it. If you want to sell us somethingā¦ this number is no longer valid. Thank you for calling Starstripe Mental Hospital, and have a nice day. You have reached the voice mail box of your name. I want to hear what you have to say.
The description reproduced above sets up the following scenario: While an operations manager employed by a restaurant (variously claimed to be Jack in the Box, McDonaldās, Burger King, or some other fast food chain) is commuting to the
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Please make a note of it. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back. Hang on a second while I get a pencil. Open a drawer and shuffle stuff around. OK, what would you like me to tell me? This is you-know who. We are you-know-where. Leave your you-know-what you-know-when.We had a contest to find the most hilarious voicemail messages to make us laugh and thought you might want to try a couple out yourself. Brought to you by Best Answering Service. This is a magic voicemail message.
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Funny, the majority of us have a phone on us more hours of the day than not, but actually weāre harder to talk to than ever. On personal calls, and especially business calls, youāre much more likely to reach voicemail than the actual person youāre hoping to engage in conversation.
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āHi, this is Craig. I waited here as long as I could for your call. Leave a message and Iāll get back with you soon. I know that each day you have a choice of many phone numbers and I appreciate you choosing mine. Have a great day.ā
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Good day, you have reached the office of [Name]. Iām away for the weekend. If you require my immediate assistance, please call 555-555-2345. Otherwise, if this is a casual call, please leave your name, number and a brief message, and Iāll get back to you on Monday.
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2. Hi, Iām not home right now but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
āIn case you have forgotten, this is a machine ā my owner does not want siding, the newspaper, or the carpets cleaned. He donates to charity through its office and do not want their picture taken. If youāre still with me, leave a message and weāll see if he calls you back.ā
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This script is very informative for motivated sellers. However, I do not have the years of experience you mentioned in the beginning. Still worth a try because I can tweak it.
This Is For Rachel makes a funny viral Meme Design for Men and Women. Grab it if you listened to this funny Voicemail and died of laughing or gift it for your Friend who likes funny saying Design, Sarcasm, trendy Jokes and Viral Memes.
Also, during your script video, you stated that your postcard mentions that the seller's initial call will only be answered by an automated service, but on the āHere's one of Our Favorite Postcardsā screenshot, the actual verbage is, āCall [this number] and I'll be happy to talk with you. If I'm out, please leave a message and I will call you shortly.ā [no mention as to why you'd call anybody āshortlyā, but that's prolly not the hill i wanna die on right now].
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Funny Voicemail Greetings. Thank you for calling Santa's workshop. Santa can't come to the phone right now, and the elves are out back barbecuing Blitzen. After the tone, please leave your Christmas list and maybe we'll get back to you!Thanks for calling Dial-A-Shrink. I can't come to the phone right now, so after the tone, please leave your
05You have reached the offices of [your company/business]. Unfortunately, we are currently closed. We are usually open between [hours] [days] and closed on [days]. Please leave us a message with your details and we will get back to you when the office opens. You may hang up after leaving your message or press the [key] for other options. Thank you for your call. This after-hours voicemail greeting lets callers know how to do business or communicate with you outside normal business hours. You may also like 6 How to Ask for a Raise Email Templates to Get Your Point Across
Thank you for calling [LinkedPhone]. Due to the current pandemic, our team members are working remotely and are available [Monday through Friday from 9am to 7pm Eastern Standard Time]. Please leave a message with your name, number, and how we can serve you. We will respond as promptly as possible. Thank you for your patience during this unprecedented time. Letās get through this together. Stay safe and well.
ā Hi, this is (name). Iām sorry I cannot take your call right now. Please leave a detailed message after the tone along with your name and telephone number. I will give you a call as soon as I return. Thank you.
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Website: https://talkroute.com/12-fun-professional-business-voicemail-greetings/
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Whoopee, a call. I wonder who this could be? Noā¦waitā¦donāt tell meā¦Oh yeah. Sorry, you bore me.
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Parodying any government or secret service agency is also a great way to create funny voicemail messages. For instance, you could say, "Thank you for calling the Slovakian Consulate. All our diplomats are out changing lightbulbs, so at the sound of the tone, please leave your details and any international secret you may have for sale." Creating funny voicemail messages that sound like they are from the mafia, the FBI, the CIA, or even the IRS can be a cool way to greet your callers when you are not available.
Website: https://funny-about-money.com/phone-solicitor-discouragement-the-long-winded-voicemail-message/
Read Poems Contests Winners Poetry By Topics Read Quotes List of Poets Discussion Forums More Writing Tips Administration Contact Us Sign-In Name : Jayde Status : Regular Member Joined : Dec 1, 2004 Posts : 61 "I'm away, taking over the world with an army of crazed penguins. Leave a message, but it probably won't matter when the whole world has been enslaved by the Penguin Lord and I am elected the Penguin Goddess. Have a nice day." "I'm not here right now, if you'd like to reach me on my cell phone, buy me a cell phone." "I am the cookie monster's secret sidekick, and as the cookie monster's secret sidekick I am required to eat all the cookies. BRB." "I'm an alien from outer space and I'm having sex with your eyeballs and you like it cuz you're smiling." If you have any more add them. I'd love to see what anyone can come up with or find. Reply Name : aaron 1 remo Status : Regular Member Joined : Nov 18, 2005 Posts : 312 ' hello...................hello..................hey who is this?............... hahahahahahaha you were just talking to a machine moron!' That was mine for quite a while untill I started to get worried messages from my nanna 'Aaron?, Aaron what happened? are you all right? did you just get mugged Aaron?!!!' Bless her Name : Italian Stallion Status : Senior Member Joined : Jun 16, 2005 Posts : 8266 "Thank you for calling 911 our offices are closed because everyone is at the donut shop....." "Greetings, this is science officer spock, currently there are no life forms avalable to take your call ...." Name : christina marie Status : Senior Member Joined : Aug 8, 2005 Posts : 964 of receiving messages My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity at the office and don't need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and home phone number and they will get back to you. think about your name, your number, and your reason for calling... and I'll think about returning your call. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets. up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll call you back. Name : melly xx Status : Regular Member Joined : May 3, 2005 Posts : 508 Name : HOLLY ARMER Status : Senior Member Joined : Apr 29, 2004 Posts : 2620 Hi, this is ________. If you want to leave a message, please wait for the tone. If you want to leave your name and number, please press pound, press 3, then dial your name, then press 6 and dial your number. If you want to leave your name and just a message, press star, press 6, ask for extension 4443, then leave your name and message. If you want to leave your number and the time you called, please press star twice, spin in a circle, press 1 twice, talk loud and BEEP Name : Void Status : Senior Member Joined : Aug 12, 2005 Posts : 835 Name : Amanda Renee Status : Regular Member Joined : Feb 20, 2006 Posts : 214 my friends is as follows... it goes... Hello... and waits a couple seconds and then it says how are you doing today? and then if you reply it says good... then it waits then you ask it a couple ?? if ur like me when i heard it i answered him and well then he goes well hey i guess i better go and i was like what he goes bye and then finally he says glad i got to talk to you on my voice mail talk soon and i will call you back' About Scholarship Entertainment Scholarship About Us Contact Us Privacy Policy Terms and Conditions How Do I Create Funny Voicemail Messages? Join the Community Lakshmi Sandhana Lakshmi Sandhana Some individuals like to create funny voicemail messages for people to hear when they call.
If done tastefully, you can promote your products or services on your voicemail greeting without sounding pushy. In fact, itās a great way to keep customers up-to-date on company events, sales, and other news. Be sure to keep it short and have fun with it.
Hi, this is John's answering machine again. He's gone and left me for a sleazy microwave he met at Krazy Eddy's. Life sucks.
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hi JP, I loved it and appreciate any help I can get. I thought it was awesome. Concise and to the point but adaptable to my business model as Iām a solopreneur but life long NE Ohioan. Can i use my dog as my family??? I meet alot of people on walks with him as he is uber cute and friendly. Let you know how it goes. Have a great day! Home Privacy Policy Terms of Use Cancellation Policy Contact Us Members Login Sitemap
6. The Referral. A referral sales voicemail works when you are referred to a client by a third party. If you are reaching out to a prospect you havenāt spoken with, you might start by mentioning that you were referred before clearly stating the intention of your voicemail message.
But when the information on the other side of the line is clear, it really lets someone down.Now, since we're talking about voice mail, the standard greetings that are usually embedded in phone companies are so boring and mechanical.Again, "leave a message after the tone" or "you have reached 7 ".
40. Hi, Iām not in right now, but if you leave a detailed message Iāll call you back promptly.
Hi there! This is my dog (10yrs old Lab-Staf-Mix) eating a goose neck. Sorry for the Fridge in the background. ... goose neck food horror Dog break chewing crack bones zombie intense Ceremony of the Unspeakable.mp3 - mp3 version Ceremony of the Unspeakable.mp3 - ogg version Ceremony of the Unspeakable.mp3 - waveform Ceremony of the Unspeakable.mp3 - spectrogram 175740.0
Holiday Voicemail Script Sample. Thank you for calling ABC Company. We are currently closed for the holiday. Our normal business hours are 8 am to 8 pm, eastern time, Monday through Friday. Your call is very important to us. Please leave your name, phone number, and a brief message regarding your ā¦
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Mickās storyful messages are keeping customers happy even though their calls were not answered. So happy in fact, that those that hear the voicemail are sharing them with others and laughing along with the owner when he calls them back.
Please make a note of it. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back. Hang on a second while I get a pencil. Open a drawer and shuffle stuff around. OK, what would you like me to tell me? This is you-know who. We are you-know-where. Leave your you-know-what you-know-when.We had a contest to find the most hilarious voicemail messages to make us laugh and thought you might want to try a couple out yourself. Brought to you by Best Answering Service. This is a magic voicemail message.
A professional voicemail greeting is slightly different than a business greeting, as certain professionals may require the caller to leave specific information. For instance, a professional therapist voicemail greeting would specifically ask for contact information from the caller, as well as leave their own personal contact information in case the caller is having problems.Ā Hello, thank you for calling the office of Dr. Harold Tweed. I canāt come to the phone right now; please leave your name, number, and message at the tone. If this is an emergency, please contact either my personal assistant at 555-555-2345 or myself at 555-555-3234 and weāll get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you for your call. Include your name/business Ask for their contact information and message Provide them with alternate phone numbers if this is a crisis Extend gratitude for their callĀ Funny Voicemail Greeting
JP always has great content as well as you always learn something new coming to his site. Great content brother!
Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us. The new number is Yes, same number.
Voicemail greetings should be professional, but the structure can vary depending on the situation. Here's a sample voicemail greeting script: "Hello, you've reached [name] at [company]. I'm unable to come to the phone right now. Leave your name and number, and I'll return your call as soon as I'm free. Thank you.".
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Share My Voicemail Greeting: Related Boards: tourettes guy. 28 Tracks 46250 Views. The Voicemail. 14 Tracks 55225 Views. Dungeons and Dragons Campaign Sounds. Phone Greeting Generic. Phone greeting 2. Phone greeting 3. Ringtone- hey your phone is ringing (sung) Angry Southern Man. Clint Eastwood. Irish Phone Msg.
33. Hello, youāve reached [X company]. Weāre currently closed to celebrate [X holiday], but weāll be back on [X date]. Please leave your name, number, and a brief message so our team can get back to you when we return.
Please leave your contact info, full name, and other details and Iāll call you back once Iām back in the [city/country/area]. Ciao for now!ā
Who is this?! How did you get this number?! If you are a friend, trying to give us money or just want to talk, then leave a message or try my cell phone number. But you can tell me all of that in the message you leave me.
So, if youāre looking for a fun way to spice up your personal telephoneās outgoing message, we have listed 10 celebrities that have contributed to funny voicemail greetings for your callersā amusement.
I totally get itā¦ I've been there, and always appreciate finding an āeasy buttonā or shortcut myself. If it'll save me (i) time, (ii) pain or (iii) the trial-and-error of making or finding it myself, then I'm in.
