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When leaving your voicemail and phone number, do not say, "Please call me back at ..." Nothing sounds more like a salesperson making a cold call then saying, "please call me back at...".

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Chances are that you have a voicemail. A landline or a cellphone usually comes standard with the option for a personal greeting. Below are some original and humorous recordings of voice messages for your mobile or immobile phone. There are plenty of other funny ideas, but we’ve seen them or heard them before. For instance, the “Hello” and pause effect- the prank is more amusing for the listener because you don’t get to hear them throughout their confusion until after the beep. A rarer one was a philosophical answering machine that I found rather witty:
Always keep in mind the people who will be listening to your professional voicemail greetings. What type of tone and information resonates with them?

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Hello, this is Jason's voice. Jason's not here right now -- hey, haven't you ever lost your voice? Well, believe you me, when I find him again, I'll have a few choice words for him. If you do too, leave them after the beep.

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How have you been? We have to meet this weekend.There are two kinds of phone users in the world: people who leave voicemails for other people and people who ignore voicemails from other people. Just kidding. Y: You have reached the voice mail box of your name. No longer do we have to slog through dial menus or trudge through every single message to get to the next.

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A voicemail greeting is a simple message that plays before callers leave a message. It may play either when you don’t answer or if your phone is off. A professional greeting may encourage people to leave messages, which in turn makes it easier for you to get back in touch. Keeping that communication open and efficient may lead to better business relationships. It also helps you put forth a professional image for your business.

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    5. The Serious Greeting. I’m going into hibernation for a few months. For more updates, check my Facebook page. Hello, to reach the person you are calling, please say the password.

    I'll call you, cause you called me. We're the ______ family. So leave your name and number at the tone. Sorry that we're not at home.
    If you’re looking for funny voicemail messages to leave on your answering machine or cell phone, then here are some of the best examples to try. We had a contest to find the most hilarious voicemail messages to make us laugh and thought you might want to try a couple out yourself. Brought to you by Best Answering Service.

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    Good professional voicemail greeting examples. A business named Lorem Ipsum, which sells widgets, wants to leave a brief message that confirms for the listener that they have called the right business. The message would also prompt the caller to provide information needed to return the call, and throws in a nice quick promotional note.

    -So long as phones can ring and eyes can see, leave a message, and I’ll get back to thee.-Now I lay me down to sleep; Leave a message at the beep. If I should die before I wake, remember to erase the tape.-Roses are red booger’s are green please leave your message on this …
    1. 911, what’s your emergency? Imagine you saying this when a call comes in. Just don’t let the other person say anything and barge in. It will make the other person laugh out loud.

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    After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. I’ll get back to you as soon as it’s safe for you to come out of hiding.

    In sales, immediate communication with your prospects and current customers is important. Being available to answer questions or further negotiate a deal allows your clients to feel secure and more apt to purchase from you. But what if you can’t answer the phone when they call? Make sure you have a voicemail system set up so your clients have the opportunity to leave you a message.
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    Fourth, wait patiently by your phone; one of us will come to you. You need to portray a sense of confidence, authority, and respect. If you would like to leave a voicemail message for an inmate, you must first have a Prepaid Account.

    Hi this is Sonny and Attie's machine. Medicare didn’t send us enough money this month so we are out robbing the liquor store. If this is the police we are just napping.
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A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we’re not here. So leave a message.

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Does your salon offer Online Bookings? If so, slip that information in your recording. Drive bookings IN. Here’s why Online Bookings are the biggest opportunity you’re missed out on if you don’t offer them.

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4. Waiting Message. What callers hear when they enter the waiting queue. Sample Scripts: “All of our agents are currently busy. Please hold and we will answer your call as soon as possible.”

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