fun professional voicemail greetings

Not sure if this is real or not (and either is snopes, see below). But, it sure is funny. Happy Monday! EDIT: Try this link. This is where I got it from, I didn't try the one below and it apparently doesn't work: Claim: Voicemail message describes a confrontation between a male motorist and four women after a minor traffic accident.

Don't mess with Bible-totin' old ladies.. Read this little explanation and then listen to the voicemail. You just have to laugh with the guy. On a recent Spurs trip, we were asking one of our sponsors who works at Jack in the Box for some funny stories or experiences with the company. The funniest story he had was when an operations manager was late for a meeting and called his boss to tell him he was running late. As he was leaving the voice mail message, he witnessed an accident and went on to provide "play by play" of the incident. After telling us the story, he promised to send us a copy of the voice mail and here it is. This is the actual voice mail message. It was passed along and forwarded so many times within Jack in the Box; it crashed their voice mail server. Origins: In one memorable episode of the 1970s television sitcom All in the Family, Archie Bunker is involved in a minor traffic accident and, eager to cash in on the incident, rushes out and engages a Jewish lawyer to sue the other party. However, after conferring with the defendant's attorney, Archie's lawyer advises him that he has http://www.snopes.com/autos/graphics/fight.gif no case, as the other side's witnesses are too strong. There's an old legal precept, he informs Archie: "You can't beat a station wagon full of nuns." Perhaps Archie Bunker couldn't beat a station wagon full of nuns, but according to a circulating audio clip, an Impala full of Bible-toting middle-aged women could beat (literally!) the motorist who ran into them. We present the recording for your listening enjoyment through [url="http://www.snopes.com/autos/audio/jackbox.mp3"]this (http://home.swbell.net/kf5tv/voicemail.mp3) link. The file size of the clip is over 4MB, so please be patient while it downloads. As to the questions of whether the account given above is an accurate explanation of the origins of this audio clip, and whether the traffic incident described actually took place, we have to leave them as "Undetermined" for now. A inquiry posed to the corporate offices of Jack in the Box restaurants produced the following response: Thank you for your inquiry. The message that has been in circulation is an actual voice mail message. The incident occurred 5-6 years ago in Texas. I'm not sure how the recording got outside the company or if the employee still works for Jack in the Box, but the recording periodically re-surfaces on the radio and the internet. Even if this explanation is accurate (i.e., the clip originated as a message left on a Jack in the Box employee's voicemail), it doesn't preclude the possibility that the accident described never took place, and the recording was just a prank one employee pulled on a co-worker. The Top 10 Best Answering Machine Messages. 10 . My wife and I can’t come to the phone right now, but if you’ll leave your name and number, we’ll get back to you as soon as we’re finished. 9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. The Top 10 Best Answering Machine Messages – Pure-Essence.Net Hi, I am not here right now, but if you are a friend, leave a message, if you are a creditor you can kiss my... (beep) funny voicemail options CraftJack can connect you to homeowners and help you grow your customer network. Follow us for expert guidance on how you can find and better manage new leads. Are you thinking about changing your voicemail greeting? Would you like some help from us? Set up a cranky, funny voicemail, and share a moment of laughter with your dear ones, before they understand your intention behind it and run to get you! Whenever I call someone and their voicemail greeting is playing, it tells me a lot about who they are, as a person. Where could I be? Believe it or not, I'm not home. The actor, Jason Alexander, recently customized this answering greeting for a big fan, Kat Dennings. Watch the full segment on Youtube here. how do you leave a personal voicemail greeting 2. Personal Voicemail Greetings. Customer Support Representative Voicemail Greeting. Hello, you've reached [name] at [X company]. If you need help with [X reason] please contact [X person/X system] or [visit our website and send us an email]. Has using headphones made you think about their working? To know how headphones work, read on. 07Thank you for calling [business name]. I’m out assisting other clients with their goals, at the moment, but look forward to attending to you. Please leave a message and I’ll return your call within one business day. To schedule an appointment press 1. This is an example of an industry-specific voicemail greeting. This voicemail gives specific and clear instructions to the callers. funny voicemail message If you are dying… well that is not our problem and we cannot do anything about it. If you want to sell us something… this number is no longer valid. Thank you for calling Starstripe Mental Hospital, and have a nice day. You have reached the voice mail box of your name. I want to hear what you have to say. You want to know why? Very good article! We are linking to this particularly great content on our site. I’m impressed! Extremely useful information specially the final section 🙂 I take care of such information a lot. I was seeking this certain info for a very lengthy time. Who thought a voicemail system could be so fun? You can copy & paste one of the scripts above into the OpenPhone voicemail interface and create a professional voiceover instantly. Want to learn more about what else is possible with OpenPhone? How to set up auto-replies; Create snippets (or text message templates) How to record phone calls Be Part Of Our Story! funny voicemail to leave someone A general voicemail greeting is what callers will be greeted with if you are unable to answer the phone at work. It is the everyday greeting, used as the default, unless you have set up a temporary greeting, such as an away message while you're on vacation, or a … what is a visual voice message Apartment Video Intercom 20 Room Entry System Intercom Room Extensions Door Strikes examples of good business voicemail greetings This is a great message. It tells me everything that could go wrong with voice messages. Where’s the name? Company? Reason for calling? Solution? Reason to call back? Couldn’t you at least get the name of the person at the front desk? This message is an automatic delete! Contact Us Recording voicemail greetings for your business or personal life requires a separate list of priorities, because they are being used for two distinct purposes and will be heard by two very different types of callers. I have a friend with two cell phones - one for work, and one for personal calls - and if you call both lines, you would never know it's the same person. Send Message Create an account. I agree to the license terms. Sign Up You already have an account? Login here. examples of good business voicemail greetings Funny voicemail greetings are just that. These types of greetings have no rules whatsoever. They’re just for funsies, so make those you care for the laugh. Most of the time, they are personal, but certain businesses can use them as well. Perhaps you operate a theatrical costume company that specializes in clown memorabilia, or perhaps you run a business that sells pranks, such as plastic puppy poo, and whoopee cushions. The other day, I was leaving a message, and the voicemail system cut me off. It seems I exceeded my 90 seconds of allotted time. No, I didn’t call back. I figured the man got the gist of the message, so I left the ball in his court. Voice Spice is a free online voice recorder and message sharing site. You can record a message, morph your voice, then share your it with others via Facebook, Twitter, Gmail and more! This message will self destruct. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it. The President is not in his office at this time. Use a cute love quote to surprise your man with a sweet message or come up with your own creative idea. Movies are the perfect place to find cute love quotes and sayings because every word in the script is carefully crafted for an emotional response. Hi, This is Jenny. Press 1 if you are going to ask me out, 2 if you want to apologize for something, 3 if you just called to say I am a princess, and 4 if you are going to say something else. (4's Will be automatically deleted.) ! funny voicemail lines how to greet on conference call how do i put a voice message on my phone Close Project how to call directly to voicemail verizon Customer Service and Operations at OpenPhone. Founder of SOUL House artist showcase in the GTA. Art is life! Dee Lee 1 year ago Reply I am told by my lawyers that the likelihood of a second RFE is "very slim". This is because apparently, USCIS will only send RFE if they dont have some information about you such as where you work and such. Once they have procedurally collected information (as they seem to have in your case), they might not come asking for the same info again... I received RFE (employment verification letter) from USCIS, texas center two years ago. I was still employed by the company who filed my GC application at that time. So the company replied and my case status was updated. But my PD was not current, so my case is still pending until now. I lost job recently, if my PD became current in early 2010, will USCIS EVL me again? I know no one can predict how USCIS works. I just want to check if anyone had experience that was checked employment status twice? During secondary session, I was asked lot of questions regarding my existing employer / earlier employer, also there were questions which were related to my 2006 employer too and tax filings of 2006 year too. Overall with complete patience, managed to come into the country with approval after 4 hours. Whatever may be the outcome, it will be either better or lot better than current condition atleast in illegals case. Gửi email bài đăng nàyBlogThis!Chia sẻ lên TwitterChia sẻ lên FacebookChia sẻ lên Pinterest Voice 2: I'm sorry, Dave, I can't do that. Hello. You are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity through the office and don't need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you. (Computer generated voices)1: Hello, there are no real people here to answer the phone right now. 1: Right, just us machines, but don't hang up! If you like, you can leave your name and telephone number... 1: Right. Leave your name, telephone number, and a brief message after you hear the beep, and we will keep track of this stuff until the real people get back. “Hello. *your name*’s answering machine is broken; this is his/her refrigerator. You can leave a message, but please say it really slowly, so I can write it on a post-it note and stick it to myself.” There are some people who tend to judge your work according to your voicemail greeting. In this article, we tell you what are the best ways to draft your voicemail message. Professional voicemail greeting examples to boost your credibility. Here are 15 business voicemail greetings to keep your clients and boost your credibility: You have reached [your name] at [your company]. Thank you for calling. Please leave your name, number and a message, and I will get right back to you. You've reached [your name] at [your Using humor is appropriate in some situations, but humor should be avoided in situations including serious businesses where reputations could be damaged or people could become upset. Both funny and sincere examples are included for a variety of options. These answering machine messages are the type that most people leave. These can be used for non-business or personal phones. Hi, you've reached ___-____. Please leave a message and I'll get back with you soon. Thanks. You know what to do. Thanks for calling. Just leave a message and we’ll get back with you. We’re sorry we can’t answer the phone right now, but we would love to get back with you as soon as we can. Just let us know what we can help you with and leave a number for us to get back with you soon. You've reached the voice mail of ______. I'm either away from my phone or talking with someone else. Leave me a message and I'll be happy to return your call. Hi. I must be away from my phone at the moment. Please leave me a message. I'll get back to you. These business answering messages can be edited to fit any type of business. It is important to anticipate what your callers may want to know even if the callers are not able to get anyone on the phone. It's always a good idea to let callers know exactly when their calls may be returned and to list the operating hours. business out of office voice message examples funny greetings for your phone voice message sample for business Close Project funny voicemail greetings Rehearse or write down your message before recording it. Remember that old saying “practice makes perfect?” It’s certainly true when it comes to creating an electronic greeting. The more you’ve rehearsed, the easier the message will be to restate. If you don’t have time to practice, writing down the greeting before recording it – and then reading it aloud from the paper – may help you stay focused on the correct wording. having a funny voicemail message is a good idea Thanks for calling Dial-An-Idiot. Right now, all our idiots are busy. After the tone, leave your name and number, and we'll have an idiot return your call as soon as possible. Need some ideas for funny voicemail greetings? Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers: No one answers phone … Never mind the fact that what she described was the content of LITERALLY EVERY VOICE MAIL IN HISTORY. Name, hello, please call back. Not really a boatload of charm on display. To fail this test, a guy would have to leave a message that said: 'No greeting. This is man. I don't remember you. End communication. — Aziz Ansari An obscenely long, coarse kermit cock is being dragged across my anguished face." | Privacy Policy | About Us | Contact Us | Sitemap | Famous Quotes & Sayings / Funny Voicemail Quotes List of top 12 famous quotes and sayings about funny voicemail to read and share with friends on your Facebook, Twitter, blogs. Top 12 Funny Voicemail Quotes 2. Hello you’ve reached Matt Grech, I’ll be out of the office for the next few days due to the holidays. Feel free to leave a message, or you can shoot me an email at Matt@GetVoIP if something urgent pops up. I’ll be sure to get back to you as soon as I return to the office. Happy holidays! 7. "Hello, this is [your name] at [company]. Thanks for calling. Please leave your name, number, and the reason you'd like to chat, and I'll get back to you ASAP." a good personal voicemail greeting what's the best voicemail app for android funny greetings happy birthday Close Project how to greet on video call To that finish, if you're a student or prof in would like of reasonable educational transcription services, please do the analysis or raise somebody you recognize so as to find simply the proper on-line company for you. here Rates and Pricing About Us Download the Rate Price PDF Contact Us FREE Voicemail Greeting Scripts Free Voicemail Greeting Scripts Funny Voicemail Greetings Business Voicemail Greetings Mailbox Greetings On-Hold Messages Welcome Messages How do I create a custom voicemail greeting? How do I set a custom voicemail greeting on my Android phone? How do I set a custom voicemail greeting on my iPhone? What is a good business voicemail greeting? Blog Español -Hello. I’m sorry I didn’t answer your call. I’m just waiting for more important people to call. If I hear your message and deem you worthy of the title “important,” I will think about calling you back, but for now. Bye! -Beep- I can't come to the phone now, so if, well, actually, I can come to the phone now, I mean, like, I'm at the phone now, recording this message, but I'm doing this now, while you're listening to it later, except for you I guess it's now, like, when you're listening to it ... now I'm confused ... leave a message and I'll explain later. 6. Voicemail Greetings For The Holidays. Hi, you’ve reached (insert name and title) at (insert company.) We’ve taken this time to be with our family’s and stuff our bellies. You need to portray a sense of confidence, authority, and respect. The best creative voicemails: This is you know who and if you don't know who, then you have the wrong number Creative Voicemails I'm too sexy for my phone and that's why I'm not home but you can feel free to leave a message. best voicemail messages for sales seven best business voicemail greetings funny voicemail app Close Project best business voicemail greetings This message will self destruct. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it. The President is not in his office at this time. 4 Funny Voice Mail To jazz up your voice mail and put a bit of theater into it, you can take the quote from Samuel; "The LORD thundered from heaven; the voice of the Most High resounded." Say this in a powerful booming tone, and then add on in your regular voice "I can't come to the phone right now but leave a message and I'll get back to you." 21. "Hello, you've reached [your name, the office of X company]. The team is currently out of the office, but we'll be back on [date] stuffed with good food and eager to speak with you. Leave your name, number, and — if you're so inclined — your favorite [holiday dish, Thanksgiving tradition, etc.]" A roaring diary indicates investment of your time and also the necessary resources. If on balance your efforts, you're still not attaining the desired results it's necessary to envision wherever you lack. my blog Saying that your have available slots for Thursday can be tricky, and also requires more work on your end, as you will need to keep relentlessly updating your salon voicemail message to adapt it. However you should give the time when you are next open. Remember to give your web address if guiding your clients to book online. Andy Warhol said that one day everyone will be famous for 15 minutes. Well, your 15 minutes was last week, but since you weren't ready, we gave it to Vanna White. Sorry. funny greetings for birthday free funny voicemail greetings funny ex voicemail Close Project telus voicemail holiday greeting Some phone systems require the recording to be on a mp3 or wav file, and some you just have to record the greeting right into your phone. This last way is likely one you have tried already. Use the link here to find a FREE voicemail greetings for business. These are scripts you can modify for your use. Funny - Humorous voicemail greetings for your amusement and use. Today I've decided to end our friendship, but I realized that you know all of my darkest secrets, so we will have to continue this relationship till the end of time. So take a look at some funny greetings that you can use as your funny cell phone voicemail ideas (or home phone). HI, you’ve reached (name). I’m so sorry I can’t pick up the call right now because I am standing right behind you. GOTCHA. My ass and I are out for a walk. So as soon as I can get my ass back in the house, I’ll give you a call. A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z About US Image credit to Far Reach Inc. http://www.farreachinc.com/blog/far-reach/2015/01/08/ho-ho-oh-how-to-create-unforgettable-corporate-holiday-greetings 1. [FREE] Pre Recorded Answering Machine Messages | HOT. Take a look at these original greetings that will make your friends and family call again and again. 1. Top Business Ideas 2. Pro Business Guides 3. How to Get Money! 4. Communicate Properly 5. Catchy Names for your Business 6. Creative Slogans for your Business 7. Market Your Business voicemail messages funny voicemail greetings funny facebook voice message professional voicemail greetings examples for a business Close Project X