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A woman calls to report a beheaded squirrel behind a building on Christmas day. She also mentions that a couple kids have got sick due to the headless squirrel. I can just picture this scene.

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You may also email us at [email]. If you would like one of our team members to call you back, please leave your full name, contact info and number after the beep. Good to hear from you!”
No19: I can't come to the phone right now because I'm down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of twenty dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handiwork, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone. If you're from the Department of the Treasury, please ignore this message. .

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21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. I am not in the office today; I may not be in tomorrow. I may be in to work sooner, if you gave me your car to borrow.
I'll call you, cause you called me. We're the ______ family. So leave your name and number at the tone. Sorry that we're not at home.

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4.) Keep your voicemail message to two points. If you need to share more information, then say in your voicemail that you’re going to send the person an e-mail message with the rest of the details. “… I’m calling to share that we have finalized the … and lastly, that we know you’d like to meet at 9:00 AM as we discussed. However, is Tuesday or Wednesday better for your team’s schedule? ….”
Back in 1997, Seinfeld’s character, George Costanza, attempts to avoid a breakup call from his girlfriend and we hear his comical outgoing machine recording.

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"Hi, you have reached the Borg collective. Please leave your name and star system and we'll assimilate you as soon as we can."

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You have reached the , Strategic Air Command Nuclear Missile Storage Facility. We are unable to come to the phone right now. At the tone, please leave your name, number and target or list of targets and we’ll launch as soon as we can. And have a nice day.

  • what to say in personal voicemail greeting

    7. Voicemail Message. The company voicemail greeting callers hear. Sample Voicemail Scripts: “You have reached the voicemail of [company name]. Please leave a detailed message and someone will return your call as soon as possible.”

    9. Outgoing Message with Samuel L. Jackson Treatment. Stephen Colbert asked Samuel L. Jackson to record his infamous voice on his outgoing message recording.
    Custom voicemail greetings are essential. If you don’t have one, it makes your business look unprofessional and a little robotic. Be sure to include something that people will want to hear when they’re calling your business. Inspirational voicemail greetings mean a lot ot your callers, it lets them know you care. When it comes to business, voicemail is the most important form of communication.

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    "Hey it's _____, and it's either I'm ignoring your call or I really can't get to the phone. Leave a message."

    Can’t take your call, I'm hiding from the men in white coats. We've been playing hide'n'seek for weeks, and they still haven't found me. Tee Hee! Leave a message?
    Listing Results Funny Cell Phone Answering Messages 47 Results Phone number Mobile phone Contact us Customer service

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    However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller. The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail.

    #3 “Hey this is Bryan, I’d tell you what to do at the beep, but I’m pretty sure you already know what to do. So yeah, just do it.”
    Release Notes Blog Case Studies Newsletters Events Press Release Testimonials Webinars White Papers Videos Recent Posts How to Increase Customer Loyalty Through Email: 5 Effective Ways 6 Ways You Can Win More Commercial Cleaning Contracts 5 Expensive Email Marketing Mistakes You Must Avoid Blitz Sales Software Announces New Integration with Capture® Lacey Life Insurance Solutions Builds More Relationships and Gains More Clients

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    17. Hi, this is [your name] at [X Business Name]. Our office is currently closed, but I’ll be back in the office at 9 a.m. tomorrow. Feel free to leave a message or send me an email at [email address], and I’ll get back to you as quickly as possible.

    Please leave your contact info, full name, and other details and I’ll call you back once I’m back in the [city/country/area]. Ciao for now!”
    Jimmy Stewart, born James Maitland Stewart, has a voice that is unmistakable and 100% unique to him. One of Mr. Stewart’s most identifiable trademarks, the slow and stammering way he delivered lines, brings forward a hilarious way to tell your callers to leave a message.

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Hi, this is Jackie, it hurts me inside to know I missed your call. Ouch. Leave your painful message after the beep.

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You may hold or leave a message at the beep. Michael has over 30 years of executive call center and answering service experience. He is a successful business owner and lead generation expert and shares tips to help other entrepreneurs build and grow their business through leads generation and lead capture solutions. His mission is to share carefully guarded marketing tips that will help small-medium business compete on a smaller budget.

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“Hi, you’ve reached [your name] at [your company]. I’m unavailable right now — probably helping [type of company] get [X results, e.g. ‘double their leads in 60 days,’ ‘hire the best and brightest engineers,’ ‘convert 40% more customers.’] Leave your name and number, and we’ll discuss how your company can see similar results.” “Hello, this is [your name] at [company]. Thanks for calling. Please leave your name, number, and reason you’d like to chat, and I’ll get to back to you ASAP.” “Hi, you’ve reached [name] at [company]. If you need a quick response, please shoot me an email at [insert email address] and I’ll be in touch by EOD tomorrow. If it’s not urgent, leave me a message with your name and number. Have a great day.” “Hey, this is [your name]. If you’re calling for [X reason], please [contact so-and-so] or [go to our website, send me an email]. For all other inquiries, leave your name and a brief message and I’ll call you back within [one, two, three] business day[s].” “Hello, you’ve reached [name] at company. I’m unable to come to the phone right now. Leave your name and number, and I’ll return your call as soon as I’m free. Thank you.”

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