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1. Hello, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m currently unavailable, but leave your name and number and I’ll return your call as soon as I can.

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“Hi, this is Ralph. You’re getting this message because I’m probably sleeping. Leave your message at the tone and maybe I’ll call you back when I’m awake. If this is about anything food-related, please press 411 and your call will be rerouted to the dog, who will immediately wake me up to take your call. Do not use 411 because you want to tell me you lost a whisker or your human changed cat litter brands on you. I don’t care. Food only! And anyway, why aren’t YOU sleeping? Weirdo.”
4. “What the hell do you want?” Well, this statement can be mistaken if you are having a bad day, but it will sound humorous if you answer your phone call with this. .

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4. Waiting Message. What callers hear when they enter the waiting queue. Sample Scripts: “All of our agents are currently busy. Please hold and we will answer your call as soon as possible.”
20. "Hey there, this is [your name] from [your company]. I'm out of the office until [date]. In the meantime, please direct your inquiries to [coworker's name] at [email address]. They can also be reached at [phone number]. Thank you."

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Phone scripts can be answered by button-dialing or voice response. With a button-dialing system, the caller will press one of the number keys to input their response. With an IVR system, callers can speak to the system to initiate commands and submit answers.
If you're looking to go all out to give the best possible first impression to your customers, hire a professional voice actor. Our customers love the voices available on Fiverr, a website that matches businesses with creative talent. You can get a professional recording done for as little as $5. If you're looking for a high-end product, check out The Voice Realm which offers the best voice talent on the planet. The quality is astounding.

funny greetings for voicemail

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Hi, I am not here right now, but if you are a friend, leave a message, if you are a creditor you can kiss my... (beep)

  • voicemail personal greeting ideas

    I really liked your script. I am looking for ideas for our ringless voicemail script and this was a great inspiration.

    2. Professional voicemail greetings for your business cell phone number. It’s a good practice for each of your team members to have their own personal business phone numbers.
    Website: https://www.shrm.org/ResourcesAndTools/hr-topics/technology/Pages/Personal-Cellphone-Privacy-at-Work.aspx

  • good professional voicemail greetings

    Press record button, I did that, and the light should be on. Hmmmm, I wonder what this button does……. This call may be recorded or monitored for quality and training purposes. Hello you are talking to a machine; I am capable of receiving messages. My owner your name here does not need siding windows or a hot tub, and her carpets are clean.

    Funny - Humorous voicemail greetings for your amusement and use. Today I've decided to end our friendship, but I realized that you know all of my darkest secrets, so we will have to continue this relationship till the end of time.
    And my cousin, she's a real girly-girl and you can actually tell from her voice and all she says in her voicemail greeting is:

  • greeting ideas for voicemail

    When on vacation, provide your callers with a return date and a back-up contact person to accommodate emergencies. This prevents you from potentially damaging a valued relationship while you enjoy some time off.

    This is not an answering machine–this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you, and I’ll think about returning your call.
    Hi, This is Jenny. Press 1 if you are going to ask me out, 2 if you want to apologize for something, 3 if you just called to say I am a princess, and 4 if you are going to say something else. (4's Will be automatically deleted.)

  • samples of professional voicemail greetings

    Whether you're in a long-distance relationship or just missing your guy, let him know how you feel with a sweet voicemail. If you can't be with your guy, but want to let him know you're thinking of him, a cute voicemail is the perfect solution.

    He/she is not at home now and I took this opportunity to rob it.I was about to steal the machine, too. you called me.Leave your name and number after the beep.I will write on a postPut it in the fridge for him/her to see.
    Funny Voicemail Messages That’ll Tickle Your Callers’ Funny Bone. • Hi. This is John – If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn’t lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money.

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Prepare for alpha test of Beep Software revision 1.05. Counting down to test: 5… 4… 3… 2… 1…

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Where could I be? Believe it or not, I'm not home. The actor, Jason Alexander, recently customized this answering greeting for a big fan, Kat Dennings. Watch the full segment on Youtube here.

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