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Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.

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1.) A study by AT&T found that five out of every six phone calls go straight to voicemail. Since you’re always more likely than not to get someone’s voicemail, before calling, script out what you want to say. Maybe even practice it out loud once before you dial.
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Greetings; Funny; Funny Voicemail Funny Voicemail sorry but nobodys available to answer you call at this time.if you'd like to leave a message please wait for the beep, then press #, then so on..great This is a free greeting. Sign in or sign up to use! Want a ringtone instead? Send it to your phone. Comments On This Greeting ( 16 ) At 6
Hi. If this is my parents, I need some money you guys. If this is my friend, I’ll get you your money. If this is a hot girl, DO NOT listen to a word I said before. I got plenty of money for you.

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Good voicemail greetings should include your name and/or company, your reason for missing the call or an apology, and instructions for leaving a message. How to Turn Your Customer Complaints into Business Benefits 50% of Business Owners Over 50 Back Trump's National Emergency Declaration How Zoho Bookings Helps Your Business Grow Square Seller Fees Stay Consistent as PayPal, Venmo Raise Rates Sponsored by Square Use Emojis in your Business Communications? Than Check Out These! How Can Your Alma Mater Help Your Small Business? Annie Pilon is a Senior Staff Writer for Small Business Trends, covering entrepreneur profiles, interviews, feature stories, community news and in-depth, expert-based guides. When she’s not writing she can be found on her personal blog Wattlebird, and exploring all that her home state of Michigan has to offer. Small Business Trends is an award-winning online publication for small business owners, entrepreneurs and the people who interact with them. Our mission is to bring you "Small business success, delivered daily."
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having a funny voicemail message is a good idea because it shows the employer your sense of humor

By the way, pro tip: I use Vumber, Vumeber.com for this service. And as you can see from the pricing is very reasonable. $10 a month gets you to local phone numbers in your area and you can use up to 500 minutes on those two numbers, three cents for each additional minute.

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6. Voicemail Greetings For The Holidays. Hi, you’ve reached (insert name and title) at (insert company.) We’ve taken this time to be with our family’s and stuff our bellies.

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    I'll call you, cause you called me. We're the ______ family. So leave your name and number at the tone. Sorry that we're not at home.

    Whether you’re out for the day or are off for the week, the first rule of an out of office voicemail greeting is: let callers know when you’ll be back! You’ll save them the frustration of continuing to call and yourself the hassle of listening to redundant voicemails. It’s also a good idea to set the expectation of whether you are answering messages while you’re away, and who they can reach for assistance in your absence.
    Your business depends on customer engagement, and voicemail messages are a large part of that engagement. A voicemail is nothing more than a digital recording system, where messages are stored for you to retrieve later. Voicemail allows you to be able to connect with customers while you are away or during your off-hours, where they can drop off a message while you are gone. A voicemail greeting, on the other hand, refers to the message that your callers hear upon answering the phone.

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    Here is a list of some funny messages and greetings for answering machines. Hello. Say something quickly, I don’t have time! Hi, I am a machine. If you hate talking to me, why have you called? I am, you-know-who. Leave your, you-know-what and you-know-when. Bye bye. I am not at home but my answering machine is. You can talk to my machine for some time. I have no issues.

    Hello. This is Chris. John and Mike aren’t here right now, but if you leave a message, they’ll get back to you as soon as they can.
    If I’m your best friend, that’s not a problem. But otherwise, I have no idea if I’m leaving a message for the right person or not. Was that his voice? I couldn’t tell. It kinda sounded like Micheal Cera. Did I accidentally just call Michael Cera’s phone? “Hey if this is Alex, it’s Bryan Allain…call me back. And if this is Michael Cera, loved you in Year One. You may also call me back.”

  • funny greetings for friends

    10Hello, this is [your name]. I’m probably at home just avoiding someone I dislike. A funny way of telling someone you’re avoiding them without sounding offensive or having to pick their calls. Please speak very slowly, make it short, make it sweet, and I’ll deliver the message to them. Using other household appliances as stand-ins for the message center is cute and funny. This voicemail will warn callers not to bring drama, so you can save yourself the trouble of having to hear a message that was about to spoil your day.

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    This is funny! I can’t come to the phone right now because I’m down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of twenty-dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handiwork, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone.

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    Website: https://www.austincc.edu/offices/telecommunications-services/tutorials-and-reference-guides/sample-voicemail-greetings

    There are very few cases in which our telephone answering service would recommend having an antiquated voicemail answer your incoming calls. A Courteous Communications can recommend these 10 recordings for personal use only. Your business callers may not appreciate these voicemail recordings, but your friends and family will surely get a kick out of them.
    Thanks for calling Dial-An-Idiot. Right now, all our idiots are busy. After the tone, leave your name and number, and we'll have an idiot return your call as soon as possible.

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09 Hey, I’m available right now but can’t find my phone. Kindly leave a message and I will call you back as soon as I get it. This cute message will help your callers know you aren’t close to your cell phone. They’ll be reassured that once you get their message, you’ll call them back.

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However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us. The new number is Yes, same number.

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1. InstaVoice. InstaVoice is among the top visual voicemail app that seeks to give you access and manage your voicemails efficiently. The application provides its users with free voicemail, voice messages, and missed call notifications.

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