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2. Straight To The Point Voicemail Greetings. (Insert name) is either away from their desk or on another call. Leave your name, number, and a brief message and (insert name) will return your call within (insert timeframe.)

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I love jokes. You want to know something I hate? Wanna hear a joke? Knock, knock! Hello, and thank you for calling the Starstripe Mental Hospital.
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Hi! You've reached Janet and Chris's room. We're not in right now. If this is our parents, we're at the library studying. Yeah, yeah, that's it, that's the ticket. If this is John, Chris is out with the girls at the party. Yeah, that's it. If this is any one else, we're at a party and you're not. Yeah, a party with the president. Yeah and the, the, the Pope. Yeah that's it.
These words are lovely dark and deep, But I've got promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep. So leave a message at the beep.

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Hello, this is Rip van Winkle. I'm not awake to take your call right now. Please leave your message at the sound of the snore.
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3. Voicemail greetings for the customer s ervice phone number. Customers will eventually need help from your business. If your customer service team is unavailable for calls, you can use the customer service voicemail recordings below.

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I'll call you, cause you called me. We're the ______ family. So leave your name and number at the tone. Sorry that we're not at home.

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    2. What to Say in a Voicemail Message. When unable to answer the phone, a voicemail message can be important. Below are examples of what to say in a voicemail message.

    33. Hello, you’ve reached [X company]. We’re currently closed to celebrate [X holiday], but we’ll be back on [X date]. Please leave your name, number, and a brief message so our team can get back to you when we return.
    Remember, your professional voicemail greeting recording can be an excellent opportunity to put your best foot forward with customers and promote your business in the process. We have collected 10 of the best voicemail greetings for business applications that we could find.

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    Hey guess who this is? You guessed it. Guess what you have to do now? You guessed it. Guess what's next? You guessed it.

    Need some ideas for funny voicemail greetings? Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers: No one answers phone …
    13Please repeat the captcha below [utter captcha] to confirm you are not a robot before being allowed to leave a message at [your name]’s voicemail. This is a great copy of the internet’s way of cracking down on spam and robots. Callers will be left repeating the captcha unknowingly. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don’t have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you leave me a voicemail, then that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you and I will call you. This is a classic line from the movie Taken (without the violence). Your callers will always get startled at the threat initially but will surely leave them in jitters as they drop a message in your voicemail. This is a classic trick and one that is both funny and frustrating. Watching people continue to speak as if you’re there is funny. Make sure they know when to leave a message though. You may also like 10 Great Templates: How to Say Thank You for Your Order to Customers

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    This type of voicemail greeting is usually started something like “You have reached the voicemail of..” It is a great greeting for not only business

    6. "Hi, this is [your name]. I'm either on a call or away from my desk. Please leave your name, number, and a brief message and I'll get back to you. Thank you.
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    No1: Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.

    5. Pre-Recorded Voicemail Drop Software. Leave Me Your Name, Number, And Reason For Call After The Beep. Call Me On Your New Number And I Will Try To Take Your Call.
    The number you have xxx-xxxx (your number) has been changed, the new number is xxx-xxxx (again, your number). CULATA!

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Is your refrigerator running? You better go catch it! Corny jokes like this don't work anymore...and won't work in your voicemail greeting. Saying things like, "Hello, you've reach the machine that lives inside Mark's cell phone. Leave a message and I'll tell him!" are really unappealing and aren't even funny.

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Here are some proven techniques for how to leave a voicemail message that gives you the best chance of getting a call back:

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If you’re looking for funny voicemail messages to leave on your answering machine or cell phone, then here’s some of the best examples to try. We had a contest to find the most hilarious voicemail messages to make us laugh and thought you might want to try a couple out yourself.

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Nobody wants to listen to a long-winded voicemail. Keep your greeting short, simple, and concise. A voicemail message should pique a client’s interest and leave them looking forward to your call. Stick to the basics, explaining your company name, hours of operation, and when to expect a callback.

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