No42: A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future.
Keeping such hilarious greetings will not only make you feel good, but your callers will also enjoy listening to them. Would you like to write for us? Well, we're looking for good writers who want to spread the word.
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Hi you've reached the home of (name) also known as 007. If you get this machine I am probably saving the world. This tape will self destruct in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
Michael has over 30 years of executive call center and answering service experience. He is a successful business owner and lead generation expert and shares tips to help other entrepreneurs build and grow their business through leads generation and lead capture solutions.
Bob here. I'm home right now, I'm just screening my calls. So start talking and if you're someone I want to speak with I'll pick up the phone. Otherwise, well, what can I say?
A word of warning: These greetings will not do you any favors if you’re in the midst of a job hunt or work in a conservative industry. Always remember your target personas. If there’s a chance they won’t appreciate your sense of humor, opt for a straightforward greeting instead. “This is Bond. James Bond. Okay, it’s really [your last name]. [Your first name] [your last name]. I’ll get back to you as soon as I’m done helping M16 save the world — which will probably be tomorrow at the latest. Have a good day.” “Hmm. Gryffindor … No, Ravenclaw. Yes, you definitely belong in Ravenclaw. *Pause.* Okay, you haven’t reached the Sorting Hat — it’s the voicemail of [your name]. Please leave your name and number (and just for fun, the Harry Potter house you think you belong in) and I’ll return your call as soon as possible.” “Hello! You’ve gotten the voicemail of [your name]. Leave your name, contact info, and the answer to the eternal question ‘Which came first, the chicken or the egg?’ Anyone who gets it right will receive a call back.”
9. OK, so I followed all the instructions that came with the machine. I pressed all the necessary buttons. So… now what? I… am… so… confused. Could you please… beep.
11. Hello, you’ve reached [your name]’s cell phone. I can’t take your call at the moment, but if you leave a brief message, I’ll get back to you as quickly as possible.
A monotone voice can be a turn off for a caller. You want your caller to feel like they missed out on speaking with you — not like they dodged a bullet.
Alright, so that's it. I'm done walking through the nuances of the script. I hopefully highlighted some of them that I think were tricky to discover and are important and subtle, but help accomplish a connection and a friendly vibe and at least a baseline. I'm just an average local guy, not some big fancy business. Uh, and uh, more likable, trustable posture.
Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future…. A is for academics, B is for beer. So leave a message.
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This free voicemail audio clip is to help with verbiage or as using for your own voicemail response. Looking for a voicemail greeting to use instead of your
“So I start by talking as if I answered the phone, like: ‘Hello? It’s Tom, is anyone there?’” Fulton eagerly explained, unaware that no one would ever stay on the line long enough to hear the voicemail he spent his entire Sunday crafting. “But that’s the joke — it’s just a message! Whoever is calling will be talking to no one,” Fulton added, failing to recognize that he was actually talking to no one since his message would never be played back by anyone under any circumstances.
And also to walk you through some of the nuances and Jedi mind tricks inside…and how it solidly prescreens & elegantly sets the stage for having solid conversations with the right people.
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