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HA HA HA! That was my mom's answering machine for most of my high school years!! I Loved it! The A is for... one was my boyfriends when he lived in the dorms but thankfully it's normal now! lol did you hear about the lady who was a big Tom Selleck fan ? she taped a scene from magnum which had his answering mahine on in it and used it for her machine. imagine getting Tom Selleck s voice when you called home. I do think it is kind of creepy to hear a dead person s voice because the survirors can t bear to erase the tape. i totally need to change my answering machine msg and im definately gonna use one of those!! lol those cracked me up!!! - would consider changing my message to the hynosis one. hi, i'm not here right now to talk with you. in the meantime, while you wait for my return, you can strip naked and run around in the streets yelling "buga buga buga". it won't make me respond sooner, but there will be some nice folks wearing white coats who will be happy to talk to you. Your name or email address: Do you already have an account? No, create an account now. Yes, my password is: Forums > Leisure and Society > Hobbies, Interests & Entertainment > Clean/Christian Jokes > A Whipp Media Site Contact Us Help Home Terms and Christian Forum Rules Privacy Policy

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Where could I be? Believe it or not, I'm not home. The actor, Jason Alexander, recently customized this answering greeting for a big fan, Kat Dennings. Watch the full segment on Youtube here.
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funny voicemail greetings ideas

Mar 14, 2021 - Explore Eric Alexander's board "cell phone humor", followed by 3292 people on Pinterest. See more ideas about humor, bones funny, phone humor.
No19: I can't come to the phone right now because I'm down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of twenty dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handiwork, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone. If you're from the Department of the Treasury, please ignore this message.

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01Hello this is [your name], I’m either on another call or away from my desk. Please leave your details, along with a short message and I’ll get back to you. This is created by individual staff for their specific number or extensions. It’s a great voicemail greeting for work when you are on another line or away from your desk.
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Operating systems that create a link between users and the applications form the core of computer systems. An OS dissociates the programs from the hardware and simplifies resource management. Let…

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Keep it Brief. Time is money in business, so if your voicemail is long, chances are the caller will simply disengage before the cue to leave a message even sounds. Keep your voicemail short. The most should be around 30 seconds, and even that’s pressing it. We’ve grown into a country where our attention span can last only about 10 seconds in some cases, so keep it short, brief and to the point. Persuade and Engage the Caller. If someone calls your business, they already have an intention. It’s the quality of your voicemail that plays a factor if they consider you a company they’d like to deal with. This is your chance to motivate someone to engage in a meaningful conversation with you. If your voicemail is shoddy, chances are they’ll hang up, or lose motivation to continue the call. In other words, your voice mail must engage and entice someone to the point that they care enough to leave you a message.

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    Here are some proven techniques for how to leave a voicemail message that gives you the best chance of getting a call back:

    4. 605–475–6964: Things could actually be worse. This is one of the best dial a joke phone numbers. Read also. Sign her already: Reactions as 18-year-old Nigerian lady dribbles men on football pitch in viral video.
    I made this "grouchy voicemail" for whoever is tired of the boring old voicemail your phone service provides. I will have more funny voicemail greetings on

  • professional vm greeting

    No one likes to be on hold. Make that experience enjoyable for your customers and clients. I can voice custom messages, with music in the background, talking about your business or products while they wait. Reassure them that someone will be with them soon.

    Voicemail greetings for business have to be very clear, precise, and to the point. Businessmen tend to avoid frivolous talks, so it is important that you stick to the basics. On the other hand, you can be funny or a little less formal while recording a voicemail for your friends and family. However, remember to adhere to voicemail etiquette while recording these greetings. So, this is where I sign out. Leave a message, I mean a comment if you like my voicemail greeting suggestions!
    To whom it may concern. You’ve tried to reach Wilbur and Ed. We aren’t here at the moment, but if you want, you can leave your contact information at the tone and one of the brood will get to you shortly. Take care, thanks for the call.

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    Slideshare uses cookies to improve functionality and performance, and to provide you with relevant advertising. If you continue browsing the site, you agree to the use of cookies on this website. See our User Agreement and Privacy Policy. Slideshare uses cookies to improve functionality and performance, and to provide you with relevant advertising. If you continue browsing the site, you agree to the use of cookies on this website. See our Privacy Policy and User Agreement for details. Home Explore Submit Search Upload Login Signup Home Explore Login Signup × You’ve unlocked unlimited downloads on SlideShare! Your download should start automatically, if not click here to download You also get free access to Scribd! Instant access to millions of ebooks, audiobooks, magazines, podcasts, and more. Read and listen offline with any device. Free access to premium services like TuneIn, Mubi, and more. We use your LinkedIn profile and activity data to personalize ads and to show you more relevant ads. You can change your ad preferences anytime. Share Email List of 50 Best Voicemail Greetings by Professional Voic... 8225 views Maintaining a business-like manner is very important in all facets of corporate life. For most compa... Recommended List of 50 Best Voicemail Greetings Be A Great Product Leader (Amplify, Oct 2019) Trillion Dollar Coach Book (Bill Campbell) APIdays Paris 2019 - Innovation @ scale, APIs as Digital Factories' New Machi... A few thoughts on work life-balance Mammalian Brain Chemistry Explains Everything Ask for More: 10 Questions to Negotiate Anything Alexandra Carter Bezonomics: How Amazon Is Changing Our Lives and What the World's Best Companies Are Learning from It Brian Dumaine No Filter: The Inside Story of Instagram Sarah Frier The Ministry of Common Sense: How to Eliminate Bureaucratic Red Tape, Bad Excuses, and Corporate BS Martin Lindstrom How I Built This: The Unexpected Paths to Success from the World's Most Inspiring Entrepreneurs Guy Raz The Fix: Overcome the Invisible Barriers That Are Holding Women Back at Work Michelle P. King The Catalyst: How to Change Anyone's Mind Jonah Berger Just Work: How to Root Out Bias, Prejudice, and Bullying to Build a Kick-Ass Culture of Inclusivity Kimberly Scott The One Week Marketing Plan: The Set It & Forget It Approach for Quickly Growing Your Business Mark Satterfield Hot Seat: What I Learned Leading a Great American Company Jeff Immelt Pressure Makes Diamonds: Becoming the Woman I Pretended to Be Valerie Graves Flex: Reinventing Work for a Smarter, Happier Life Annie Auerbach Nailing the Interview: A Comprehensive Guide to Job Interviewing Imran Afzal Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals Oliver Burkeman You're Invited: The Art and Science of Cultivating Influence Jon Levy We Should All Be Millionaires: Change Your Thinking, Build Bank, and Claim Your Independence Rachel Rodgers Blue-Collar Cash: Love Your Work, Secure Your Future, and Find Happiness for Life Ken Rusk Inclusify: The Power of Uniqueness and Belonging to Build Innovative Teams Stefanie K. Johnson Finance Secrets of Billion-Dollar Entrepreneurs: Venture Finance Without Venture Capital Dileep Rao The Three Happy Habits: Techniques Leaders Use to Fight Burnout, Build Resilience and Create Thriving Workplace Cultures Beth Ridley Everybody Has a Podcast (Except You): A How-To Guide from the First Family of Podcasting Justin McElroy 0 Likes Statistics Notes APIdays Paris 2019 - Innovation @ scale, APIs as Digital Factories' New Machi...

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    5. Ooma. Ooma voicemail app is among best voicemail app android providing high degree of flexibility. The app offers its users with high-quality voicemail and all-around phone services from anywhere.

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    Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll be right with you.

    I think that's hilarious! Hope that helps! This is not a voicemail; this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you and I'll think about returning your call. I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember.
    Website: https://www.studyeducation.org/study/free-pre-recorded-voicemail-messages

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Hello you are talking to a machine; I am capable of receiving messages. My owner your name here does not need siding windows or a hot tub, and her carpets are clean. Hello, your name summer home. Leave your message at the tone. Hello, and welcome to Answering Machines of the Rich and Famous! Please leave your name, telephone number, and a brief message in a voice similar to mine, and your call will be returned as soon as humanly possible.

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No42: A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future.

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You have reached xxx-xxxx. We picked this machine up at a garage sale in “as-is” condition. You can try to leave a message on it, but we are not sure it will be recorded. If we don’t return your call, it means the machine did not work.

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Now I lay me down to sleep; leave a message at the beep. If I should die before I wake, remember to erase the tape.

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