Hello, this is David. I don't live here, so if you were trying to call me, you've dialed the wrong number. On the other hand, if you were trying to call John, Jim, or Eric, please leave your name and number at the tone. I don't guarantee that one of them will call you back—only that I won't.
However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us. The new number is Yes, same number.
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Hey guess who this is? You guessed it. Guess what you have to do now? You guessed it. Guess what's next? You guessed it.
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Home » Funny Voicemail Quotes & Sayings
“Hello, you’ve reached the special agent Bond. James Bond. Okay okay, it’s actually [last name]. I’m currently away saving the world on a top-secret mission but I will get back to you as soon as possible. Please leave your name, contact info, number, and availability and I’ll call back as soon as I’m done helping M16. Have a great day. [last name] out!”
It is really important to strike a balance between coming off as too cold, conservative and impersonal with making your message too out there, long or eccentric. If you can create something memorable, it will help engage a caller, or potential client. Go too far off the deep end, and you’ll scare them away
As you can see by reading our article on how to write the best voicemail greetings, they’re a bit more complex than one might imagine. There are important elements that cannot be left out, as to do so could cost you valuable business contacts. We realize this, so have included a selection of more funny, professional, and personal greeting examples, in MS Word and PDF format. By using these voicemail greetings, you’ll be well on your way to craft a greeting that will be pleasant to hear, provide the correct information, as well as requesting the correct information.
More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time. However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller. The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail. A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century.
Thank you for calling [LinkedPhone – Where Freedom Rings!]. You’ve reached us outside of business hours. Please select from one of the following options: [for business hours press 1; to leave a message press 2; if this is an emergency, press 0 to be directed to our 24-hour customer success team.] We are grateful for your call and we look forward to speaking with you soon!
Please dial the number you are calling. You are calling the number you have dialed. I’m sorry, you have 40 cents. Please deposit more money.
So take a look at some funny greetings that you can use as your funny cell phone voicemail ideas or home phone. My ass and I are out for a walk.
1. Hi! You have reached voicemail of (your name), (job title). I am currently away from my desk. Please leave your complete name, contact number and short message after beep and I will be sure to get back to you the time I am available. 2. Good morning. You have reached (company name or office name) of (name).
Hi! I’m not here right now, I seem to have broken my tomatoes…You wouldn’t happen to have any tomato paste on you, would ya?
9. "Hey, this is [your name]. Thanks for reaching out. I'm busy at the moment, but if you leave your name, number, and message, I'll return your call.”
So, haha funny story, my phone and I are playing hide and seek…. Hey before you leave that message, do you want to know something about me?
27. Hey, this is [your name], but you should know that already since you called me. I’m obviously not here right now, so I won’t patronize you by telling you what to do after the tone.