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“Hello. *your name*’s answering machine is broken; this is his/her refrigerator. You can leave a message, but please say it really slowly, so I can write it on a post-it note and stick it to myself.”
Ok, I just watched (and took very careful notes during) your seller initial call script video. I have all the answers I need except for one… .

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A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future….
#3 “Hey this is Bryan, I’d tell you what to do at the beep, but I’m pretty sure you already know what to do. So yeah, just do it.”

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I don't want to bore you with metaphysics, but how do you know this is an answering machine? Maybe it's a dream, or maybe it's an illusion, or maybe you don't really exist. One way to find out is to leave a message, and if it's reality, I will call you back.
I love jokes. You want to know something I hate? Wanna hear a joke? Knock, knock! Hello, and thank you for calling the Starstripe Mental Hospital.

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Comrades! Southwestern Front Headquarters is pleased to learn that your unit has re-established communications. The entire staff is currently busy discussing forthcoming operations with other units, but if you leave your unit name and how we may reach you, Chief of Staff Sterrett will contact you as soon as possible to discuss your concerns.

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You have reached the , Strategic Air Command Nuclear Missile Storage Facility. We are unable to come to the phone right now. At the tone, please leave your name, number and target or list of targets and we’ll launch as soon as we can. And have a nice day.

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    Dave is out. Jane is out. Rover is out. This is their answering machine. I am in. The beep is in. At the sound of the beep leave your name. At the sound of the beep leave your message.

    4. "Hello, you've reached [your name and title]. I'm currently out on parental leave until [date]. In the meantime, please direct all phone calls to [alternate contact name] at [phone number] and emails to [email address]. Thanks, and I'll see you in [month you'll be back in the office]."
    9. Hi, this is [your name], [your job title] at [your company]. I’m currently away from my desk, but please leave a message with your name, number, and reason for calling so I can get back to you in a timely manner. See Also: 50% of Business Owners Over 50 Back Trump's National Emergency Declaration

  • proper professional voicemail greetings

    Read this little explanation and then listen to the voicemail. You just have to laugh with the guy.

    "Every generation imagines itself to be more intelligent than the one that went before it, and wiser than the one that comes after it." Lord_all_Mighty, May 22, 2003 Joined: Oct 20, 2002 Messages: 1,506 Location: Too close to Victoria You have reached the home of Tarzan. Sorry i can't answer the phone right now, please leave a message after the AAAHHHHHHAAHHHHHHAAHHHHHHHH Bose, May 23, 2003 Joined: May 16, 2003 Messages: 352 Location: Poland, Warsaw -Robert, answer the phone! Oops, I am Robert! But I'm away now. See? You have to record a message... -You have just reached Browns. We're arguing right now. Record a message: when we'll finish, the one that didn't move out to his/her mother will call you. -Hello, here's Iraq Army HQ. We are out because we want to conquer the USA. When Yankees will kick our butts again, we'll call you.
    Informal voicemail greetings are those that don’t adhere to the rules of professional and business voicemail greetings. Here, you are free to just leave a simple greeting, or use it to show your more witty side. This style of greetings can be used for both home and business if you like, depending on the type of caller you expect.

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    1. HI, you’ve reached (name). I’m so sorry I can’t pick up the call right now because I am standing right behind you. GOTCHA.

    Background noise can make it hard for the person calling in to understand your greeting. Limit the noise around when you record your message!
    Going Green. Saving Money. Getting Tech Savvy. These are some of the many reasons why businesses choose to send eGreeting cards in lieu of traditional paper cards. If you are considering sending an eGreeting card this year, follow these steps to make it the best it can be: Business and Personal Professional Voicemails October 28, 2011 Katie Devlin resources, tips, greetings

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    Are you ready to talk to the answering machine? Now you can with MY voice message. It listens, records, and even has a beep! Unlike other voicemails, every word is heard. This is a huge value, all for just 2 easy payments and one complicated payment. If you leave a message within the next 10 seconds, I will return your call free of charge. This offer is not available in stores, so leave a message now. Self-evident Jane Barbe (not a real recording, her real voice mashup) makes sure that you know…

    “Yo, this is Leon. If you’re calling about scoring some catnip — oops, I mean ‘you know what,’ meow twice in your message. If you’re calling about ear-cleaning services, meow once. Or maybe meow once for ‘you know what’ and twice for ear cleaning. I don’t remember. Maybe don’t leave a message and we’ll psychically connect. OK? Cool.”
    Click On The Link To Read More About Parenting With Purpose Christianparenting Funny Mom Jokes Funny Mom Quotes Mom Life Quotes The best creative and funny voicemail messages along with professional voicemail greetings. funny answer phone messages, answer phone messages funny, funny phone answering messages, funny cell phone voicemail messages, funny cell phone messages, cell phone messages funny, cell phone funny text messages, funny cell phone text messages, free funny phone messages, funny phone messages, Labels: cell phone funny text messages, cell phone messages funny, free funny phone messages, funny cell phone text messages, funny phone messages

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If your phone has a Lady Gaga ring-back tone, then I can’t guarantee I’ll wait for you to answer. 5. …I would thank you for calling, but I haven’t heard what you have to say yet. Just kidding! I’ll return your call as soon as possible. Thanks! 6. …If you’re Jennifer Lawrence, call my emergency line. (Insert your celebrity crush

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Be honest...you've been fooled by this one before, haven't you? It goes like this: riiiing, riiing, riiiing "Hey." "Hi, it's Juli what's up?" "Oh. I'm not here right now, leave me a message after the beep". There is actually very little I find more irritating than this voicemail, especially for business. Why do you want to fake out a business opportunity? This voicemail leaves callers feeling embarrassed and you looking foolish.

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Maralee McKee is dedicated to helping you become the person you most want to be and to live a confident, kind, and generous life! She is a contemporary etiquette, manners, and people skill expert and the founder of the prestigious Etiquette School of America. She's in the top one percent of experts in her field, and her etiquette skills blog is the most read in the United States. Maralee presents business etiquette seminars to corporations large and small and coaches individuals one-on-one virtually and in-person. Her book on how moms can teach their children to become the best version of themselves (Harvest House Publishing) earned the prestigious Mom’s Choice Gold Award for excellence in parenting books.

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