I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your message, name and number, I'll call you back when I am.
38. Thanks for calling [company name]. We’re unable to take your call right now, but leave your details and we’ll call you right back.
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Hi, this is Stephanie's answering machine. If you're the phone company asking for money, stop bugging her, she'll send it sooner or later. If you're a TV company advertising TVs, she already has a TV with every channel known to man, and several known to monkeys. If you called for any other reasons, please hang up the phone, start screaming, and run to the nearest shoe store. When you get there, ask them for a cheeseburger. (This probably won't help you, but we'll always have something to laugh about when we're bored.)
4. Hi, thanks for calling GetVoIP. We would love to help you out in anyway we can, but these Holidays are keeping us from getting anything done! We will be returning to the office after the New Year on Jan 2nd, but feel free to head over to our website GetVoIP.com to learn what you can. Happy holidays!
Roses are red, violets are blue. Sugar is sweet, and so are you. The roses have wilted, the violets are dead. The sugar bowl's empty, and so is your head. The roses stink, sorta like sheep. But leave your name, number, and message after the beep. The roses are molding, the violets are rotten. And I might call you back, if I haven't forgotten.
21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages | Laugh Break FREEAnsweringMachineMessages. FREE. Answering. Machine. Messages. Below is a list of various Answering Machine Messages and messages you can use on your voice mail system. 6thSenseDetectiveAgency.wav AdamSandlerPotSmokers.mp3 Africain.mp3 Afterlife.wav AliceCooper.wav
20. Hi, you’ve reached [your name]’s phone. I’m busy making deals or rock climbing [replace with your personal hobbies], so leave your contact information and a brief message so I can call you back when I have a free moment.
Need your voicemail recording as soon as possible? Depending on the complexity of your job, you can receive your final audio files in as little as one day.
8. “Phone tag, you’re it.” Remember that childhood game of tag, you’re it? It’s the same with this phrase, but it is slightly changed. It sounds best when you want to create a playful or mischievous vibe.
There are plenty of options for business voicemail messages, including professional greetings, casual messages, and even funny ones. Consider your brand voice and target audience to choose the tone. And include directions for those who call.
Hi. This is Kevin and Diana's vacuum cleaner. Their appliances have switched jobs again, and I get to answer the phone 'cause my old job sucked. So leave a message after you hear the beep, and you can be sure it's in the bag.
(Kazoo band playing "Thus Spake Zarathustra") Thinking you were making an ordinary phone call, you have instead reached... (TA-DAAAAA!) the ANSWERING MACHINE! Leave your name and number, and we will get back to you as soon as we can. Steve: You fool, I know it's... Wait... Matt... What are you doing with that frying pan? (BONK... THUD) Hi there. This is Joe speaking. I'm home right now, and in a moment, I'll have a decision to make. Leave your name and number and I'll be thinking about it... Bob here. I'm home right now, I'm just screening my calls. So start talking and if you're someone I want to speak with I'll pick up the phone. Otherwise, well, what can I say? (Fun to leave on a friend's machine when he's away... Sounds of raptuous sex) Hi. Mike can't come to the phone right now because he's having sex. If you leave your name and number, he'll get back with you in juuust a second. (Male groan; female voice) That's it?You're in Big Trouble Hello! I'm on a four state killing spree! WATTA YA WANT? (Voice 2) These are the messages of Chad's answering machine. Its two semester mission: To seek out your name and your telephone number. At the sound of the... This is 234-3249, and no, it's not Pete's Pizzeria. It's not the Credit Union either, and no one named Pam lives here. You can leave a message though. Hi. Do you ever feel, like, your head is full of sand, not your regular loose sand mind you, but compacted sand, and there were like, I dunno, bugs or something jumping up and down on the compacted sand? Well, sometimes I do. Bye. Bullwinkle: Hey, Rocky, somebody called while we weren't home. Watch me pull their message out of this machine! Bullwinkle: Nuthin' up my sleeve... PRESTO! (Sound of vicious dog barking, stops abruptly.) Rocky: Here's a chance for you to REALLY leave your message. (A friend was at a mutual friend's sister's house, and when she went out for beer, he changed her answering machine message. In a loud, deep, gravelly, horror-film voice he recorded) Hi, this is Kathy. I'm not myself right now. If you leave your name and number, I'll get back to you when I'm feeling better.Farewell These words are lovely dark and deep
I think that's hilarious! Hope that helps! This is not a voicemail; this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you and I'll think about returning your call. I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember.
It’s the way that people contact you when you are busy with other clients or customers, and cannot get to the phone. It is often the customers or clients first impression of your business or brand, you need to leave a great impression. The worst thing is for a first time caller, or even a returning customer, to get a short blurb like “Leave a message i’ll call you back”. Or, just a beep after the ring.
3. "Hey, this is [your name]. If you're calling for [X reason], please [contact so-and-so] or [go to our website, send me an email]. For all other inquiries, leave your name and a brief message and I'll call you back within [one, two, three] business day[s]."
What kind of company do you run? A law firm may prefer more formal business voicemail greetings than a trendy retail store, for example.
Even if this explanation is accurate (i.e., the clip originated as a message left on a Jack in the Box employee’s voicemail), it doesn’t preclude the possibility that the accident described never took place, and the recording was just a prank one employee pulled on a co-worker.