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Below are some of the best clean funny answering machine (voicemail) messages! Want to know the best part? You can try using them in your answering machine or voice mailbox life.

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Hey sugar, you call this number often? I bet you have answering machines bothering you all the time. Yes indeedy. Why don't you give me a call sometime and we can listen to some old recordings. I might even play my beep for you.
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She’s rolling down the window; oh man I think she sprayed him with pepper spray. His hands are on his face and he’s on his knees. She’s getting out and beating him with an umbrella.

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In this version, you pretend to realize how dumb it is to leave instructions WHILE you are leaving instructions. Hey everyone, listen to me having an epiphany, and then leave me a message.
Are you thinking about changing your voicemail greeting? Would you like some help from us? Set up a cranky, funny voicemail, and share a moment of laughter with your dear ones, before they understand your intention behind it and run to get you! Whenever I call someone and their voicemail greeting is playing, it tells me a lot about who they are, as a person.

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Please leave one. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.A cute, thoughtful voicemail adds excitement to your boyfriend's day. Give him a reason to smile and think about you with a fun message he won't forget. From awful pickup lines to adorable puns, cheesy phrases make great messages for your guy. Take inspiration from popular memes and plays on words to create an original cheesy voicemail. Use a cute love quote to surprise your man with a sweet message or come up with your own creative idea.

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    You can’t always respond to the mobile phone and contacting 15 times is not encouraging. Ship a textual content or go away a voicemail. • beautiful | GirlsStuff

    Professional voicemail greeting examples to boost your credibility. Here are 15 business voicemail greetings to keep your clients and boost your credibility: You have reached [your name] at [your company]. Thank you for calling. Please leave your name, number and a message, and I will get right back to you. You've reached [your name] at [your
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    You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly. What's the funniest/coolest/cleverest/favorite Answering Machine/Voicemail/Answerphone Messages you've heard, or even done yourself? In college my roomate was a cop, he told me that the worst things you can say on an answering machine were 1) telling them your name, 2) telling the caller your number, 3) and that you aren't at home. Well, here's what I did...

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    21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages | Laugh Break Free Wav Sound Effects. Wav Sounds is a family friendly website that offers a good roundup of free

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    1. Hi this is [your name], I’m either away from my desk or on the phone, please leave your name and number along with a short message and I’ll be sure to get back to you. 2. I’m sorry, but I’m momentarily tied up. Please leave your name and number, and I’ll …

    Or I Send You Straight To Voicemail Because I Don T Want To Listen To You Talk About Yourself For An Hour Ecards Funny Someecards E Cards
    I would be more than happy to discuss your project and your budget, together we can come up with a plan that works for everyone. Budgets and negotiation are often part of the business world.

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    No31: I didn't take a shower today, and I might not take one tomorrow. So if you don't leave a message after the tone, you might have to deal with me in person.

    Michael has over 30 years of executive call center and answering service experience. He is a successful business owner and lead generation expert and shares tips to help other entrepreneurs build and grow their business through leads generation and lead capture solutions.
    This page is dedicated to the best of what the net has to offer in terms of funny and witty voicemail messages! Impersonations and much more... voicemail messages that are certainly not professional, but entertaining and fun! Enjoy!

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Roy H. Williams is the OG Marketing Strategist and Master Copywriter. He IS The Wizard of Ads™, and it is his proven methodology, principles, and framework that are used daily at the Wizard of Ads™.

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Don't you do it! Don't you dare! I don't want to hear it! Don't you beep! If you beep, I'll... Don't even think about it! Don't!

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A word of warning: These greetings will not do you any favors if you’re in the midst of a job hunt or work in a conservative industry. Always remember your target personas. If there’s a chance they won’t appreciate your sense of humor, opt for a straightforward greeting instead. “This is Bond. James Bond. Okay, it’s really [your last name]. [Your first name] [your last name]. I’ll get back to you as soon as I’m done helping M16 save the world — which will probably be tomorrow at the latest. Have a good day.” “Hmm. Gryffindor … No, Ravenclaw. Yes, you definitely belong in Ravenclaw. *Pause.* Okay, you haven’t reached the Sorting Hat — it’s the voicemail of [your name]. Please leave your name and number (and just for fun, the Harry Potter house you think you belong in) and I’ll return your call as soon as possible.” “Hello! You’ve gotten the voicemail of [your name]. Leave your name, contact info, and the answer to the eternal question ‘Which came first, the chicken or the egg?’ Anyone who gets it right will receive a call back.”

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