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Our previous post on funny voicemail greetings got so much attention, we thought we’d continue the hilarity with even more of your favorite greetings that you can use. Here’s the latest batch: I have nothing to say to you. So leave a message. “Think fast!” *beep* Hi, you’ve reached _____.

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My ass and I are out for a walk. So as soon as I can get my ass back in the house, I’ll give you a call. Leave a message till then.
42. Hi, you’ve reached [X company]. Our team is currently out of the office or assisting other customers. Leave your name, number, and a brief message so we can direct your call to the proper team member when we return. .

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To increase the chances veterinary clients will take your calls or listen to any voice mail messages you do leave, consider these strategies:
10. Uncovering Competitor Info. When it comes to sales voicemail scripts, even the smallest details of a message significantly impact the response rates.

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"Hey it's _____, and it's either I'm ignoring your call or I really can't get to the phone. Leave a message."
There are many times during a busy work day that you will have to be away from your phone. Meetings, lunches, bathroom breaks and more. 5 Not available to answer the call voicemail scripts and demos

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    – Thank you for calling XYZ Company. We are currently unavailable to take your call. Our business hours are nine to five, Monday through Friday. If you know the extension number of the person you are trying to leave a message for, you may dial it now. Press 1 for sales. Press 2 for customer service. Press 3 for the billing department. Press 9 for a company directory, or hold on to leave a message for the operator. If this is an emergency, please enter 911 now to be connected with the after-hours support personnel.

    We hope you are enjoying TechSpirited! We provide informative and helpful articles about the outlook for IT jobs throughout the U.S. Learn more about the career in IT you’ve always wanted, or find new tips to further your technology career. Funny Voicemail Greetings, Answering Machine Messages & Pa Announcements 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 Telephone Voiceovers and Messages Guided Meditation Internet Service Terms Apple Music & Privacy Cookie Warning Support Feedback Services Message On Hold Phone Menu Prompts Narration Samples Voices Music Script Industry Contact Support About Us Our Team Employment Blog Store Search Google 5 Examples of Funny Voicemail Greetings and Why You Should Avoid Them Juli Durante resources, tips, greetings 6 Comments
    2. “DUDE! I told you to bury the arms and throw the body in the ocean” This will surely make the person on the other end go bonkers for a second. If you want to play a prank with them, then use this phrase.

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    10 rows · Voicemail Greeting Sound Files. Bill Crystal / Fernando Lamas – You look marvelous. New: …

    A general voicemail greeting is what callers will be greeted with if you are unable to answer the phone at work. It is the everyday greeting, used as the default, unless you have set up a temporary greeting, such as an away message while you're on vacation, or a special message during a holiday.
    4. 605–475–6964: Things could actually be worse. This is one of the best dial a joke phone numbers. Read also. Sign her already: Reactions as 18-year-old Nigerian lady dribbles men on football pitch in viral video.

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    YouMail, a free cell phone voicemail service provider, has partnered with Salient Media to provide users with comedic voicemail greetings. Some of the greetings from Salient entertainers are free, while other greetings are sold on a subscription basis. Subscriptions range between $1.99 a month to $9.99 a month, based on the number of different greetings a user uses at one time. “This partnership is a significant milestone in YouMail’s goal of creating and distributing the best premium content to our users,” said Alex Quilici, CEO of YouMail. “Salient Media’s breadth and depth within the entertainment industry will give us the opportunity to offer YouMail users premium content from the industry’s most popular and powerful entertainers, artists, comedians and actors.”

    Website: http://www.littlethingsmatter.com/blog/2010/03/08/make-a-positive-impression-with-your-personal-voicemail-greeting/
    No15: Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll be right with you.

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    My voicemail prompts the caller to leave his or her name and number. My dad’s response on his most recent message:

    Hello, this is Jim. Unfortunately I can't answer the phone right now because I've just come back from the Mirror Worlds and I'm still made up of antimatter, so if I were to pick up the phone right now, the resulting energy release would make Hiroshima look like a wet firecracker. So leave a message at the tone and I'll get back to you as soon as my component particles have been restored to their normal charges.
    4. Provide your voicemail system's password. You will be prompted to enter the passcode to your voicemail account, if you have set one (which, hopefully, you have).

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Well, if you left me a message at some point in 2009 there was a good chance you heard that greeting.

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Voicemails can give an important message or inform the caller about the receiver's status. Thus, it is important for you to be clear while recording such messages. Here are a…

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Hi this is Sonny and Attie's machine. Medicare didn’t send us enough money this month so we are out robbing the liquor store. If this is the police we are just napping.

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A relatively unprofessional one — like mine, for instance — does the opposite: It encourages prospects, recruiters, and potential connections to run in the other direction.

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