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If you are family/friends, press 1. If you are someone looking to give me a job, press 2. If you are one of the multiple out-of-area code numbers that constantly insist upon calling me, even though you should know by now im never going to answer, press the end button. This is the voicemail box of The Goddess.

funny voicemail greetings

9. 212-479-7990: You have been rejected. You met an exciting new person, asked for their phone number, and got it. But when you called, it was not them on the line.
A robot? Seriously, a robot? Are you that lazy that you can’t set up a stinking voice mail greeting? .

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This is a magic voicemail message. Leave a message. Leave a message at the beep. Oh, here it is. Hi, thanks for calling. If you need to reach me right away call my personal line as purposefully leave of one numberthat Hi, I am available to the phone right now but I take the calls in order of importance.
Your call is important to us and we will get back to you as soon as possible. Please leave your full name, contact details, phone number, and availability after the beep and we will call you back straight away. Thank you!”

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I guess I’m a little like a cat in that way. I’m a call screener. If you’re my friend and you’re reading this, please understand I don’t screen your calls. Just everyone else’s.
8. Hi there. This is Joe speaking. I’m home right now, and in a moment I’ll have a decision to make. Leave your name and number and I’ll be thinking about it…

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I can't come to the phone now, so if, well, actually, I can come to the phone now, I mean, like, I'm at the phone now, recording this message, but I'm doing this now, while you're listening to it later, except for you I guess it's now, like, when you're listening to it ... now I'm confused ... leave a message and I'll explain later.

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If it is bad news, do not leave the bad news in a voice mail. Good news voice mail – “Ms. Smith, this is Dr. Vet, and you will be glad to hear all of Fluffy’s testing came back fine. She is good to go until her next appointment.” Bad news voice mail – “Ms. Smith, this is Dr. Vet, and we have the results of Fluffy’s tests. Please

  • fun professional voicemail greetings

    3. Stammer-Filled Voicemail Greeting from Jimmy Stewart. Jimmy Stewart, born James Maitland Stewart, has a voice that is unmistakable and 100% unique to him.

    So take a look at some funny greetings that you can use as your funny cell phone voicemail ideas or home phone. My ass and I are out for a walk.
    8. Outside Business Hours. What the caller hears when they call your company outside of business hours. Sample Scripts: “Thank you for calling [company name].

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    Voicemail greetings for business have to be very clear, precise, and to the point. Businessmen tend to avoid frivolous talks, so it is important that you stick to the basics. On the other hand, you can be funny or a little less formal while recording a voicemail for your friends and family. However, remember to adhere to voicemail etiquette while recording these greetings. So, this is where I sign out. Leave a message, I mean a comment if you like my voicemail greeting suggestions!

    hi JP, I loved it and appreciate any help I can get. I thought it was awesome. Concise and to the point but adaptable to my business model as I’m a solopreneur but life long NE Ohioan. Can i use my dog as my family??? I meet alot of people on walks with him as he is uber cute and friendly. Let you know how it goes. Have a great day! Home Privacy Policy Terms of Use Cancellation Policy Contact Us Members Login Sitemap
    I call bullshit. Why does he start describing what the guy is wearing when he gets out of the car?

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    Roses are red booger's are green please leave your message on this stupid machine .

    Hello, this is Sally's microwave. Her answering machine just eloped with her tape deck, so I'm stuck taking her calls. Say, if you want anything cooked while you leave your message, just hold it up to the phone.
    Don't create any unnecessary complications by asking someone to call you back at the office when you're calling from your cell phone.

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    The last few years have seen a huge rise in the use of automated voicemails and auto-attendant greetings. This has been especially true for the business sector, where professionals should record friendly and polite voicemails to greet their customer callers.

    Many professionals in New York take the subway every day to work. More often than not, you have a quiet train ride with no interruptions. Now, let’s say you sit down and this panhandler begins his hilarious rant.
    Well, if you left me a message at some point in 2009 there was a good chance you heard that greeting.

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funny voicemail greetings for cell phones download

11. "Hi, you've reached [company]. Unfortunately, we're currently unavailable. But we want to talk to you — so please leave your name and number, as well as your reason for calling, and someone will call back ASAP."

how do you greet someone in a call center

If you’re busy and can’t get to the phone, make sure your answering machine or voice mail greets the guest with a professional message before the third ring (see the later section, “Relying on answering machines or voice-mail systems” for details). from Running a Bed and Breakfast For Dummies by Mary White Wiley, 2009

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Is it an interactive automated service, or just a “please provide the following information and someone will contact you shortly” kind of thing? I'm referring to your Vumber number greeting/interaction with the seller during their first ever reach out to you via your postcard. Am I making sense? I have pneumonia so I'm a bit hazy… 😛

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1. 911, what’s your emergency? Imagine you saying this when a call comes in. Just don’t let the other person say anything and barge in. It will make the other person laugh out loud.

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