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I can't come to the phone now because alien beings are eating my brain. Leave a message anyway, and after the alien beings assume my shape, one of them will get back to you.

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6. I can’t come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don’t remember. I’d appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and telling me something about myself.
8. Outside Business Hours. What the caller hears when they call your company outside of business hours. Sample Scripts: “Thank you for calling [company name]. .

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5. Delay Announcement. What the caller hears every two minutes that they are in the waiting queue. Sample Scripts: “Thank you for your patience. All of our agents are still busy.
Would you like to write for us? Well, we're looking for good writers who want to spread the word. Get in touch with us and we'll talk However, if you are offering to buy dinner, I may be available sooner than you think. Thanks for calling. They go on and on, wasting your time. I pledge to you, my caller that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me. This is name. If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.

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No30: I don't want to bore you with metaphysics, but how do you know this is an answering machine? Maybe it's a dream, or maybe it's an illusion, or maybe YOU don't really exist. One way to find out is to leave a message, and if it's reality, I will call you back.
If you’re a #Trekkie or a #Trekker, this is the best of our funny voicemail greetings. Let Spock deliver your outgoing message to all of your callers.

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These voicemail ideas may not come so easily for some of you. And who says that finding inspiration is a bad thing. It has to be different and contain some kind of style.

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Enjoy the short voice mail greetings that are sure to be funny. Use this at your own risk! This is the operator, what number were you trying to dial?

  • holiday greeting to someone who lost a loved one

    -Hey you all, thanks for calling me today. It will be super nice if you would leave me a special and kind message so I’m encouraged to call you back.

    Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
    -Now I lay me down to sleep; Leave a message at the beep. If I should die before I wake, remember to erase the tape.

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    Currently there are no lifeforms available to take your call but at the pre-arranged audio signal, please feel free to leave any verbal communication you feel is necessary.

    Hello, this is Sally's microwave. Her answering machine just eloped with her tape deck, so I'm stuck taking her calls. Say, if you want anything cooked while you leave your message, just hold it up to the phone.
    Oh, one more thing;Where do you say you live?Hi.I need some money if this is my parents.If this is my friend, I will give you your money.If this is a hot girl, don't listen to what I said before.

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    6.) Don’t miss the opportunity to leave a specific message. There’s nothing more frustrating than listening to a voicemail that basically says, “Hi, it’s me. Call when you can!” Even if you’re just calling to say hi, make that your phone message. “Hi, Barbara! It’s Maralee! I haven’t heard your voice in too long, and I wanted to touch base and say hi. I’ll give you a call tonight at 8:00 your time. I hope we can chat then. Stay warm in Michigan. I heard about the storms.”

    First you need to know how much time your phone system or provider allows for the duration of the greeting. Some are 30 sec some are longer. Then you need to have a few ideas of what you want to say, or ask your callers.
    I really liked your script. I am looking for ideas for our ringless voicemail script and this was a great inspiration.

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Oh lord…is it you…again? Well, if you must, leave a name and number after the beep. I’ll try to return the call, if I can stand it, that is.

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Elements of a Good Business Voicemail Greeting. Typically, a good business voicemail greeting should comprise the following elements: A warm greeting. Your name, the name of your company and department name. Make an apology for being unable to take the call. Ask the caller to leave a message. Let the caller know when to expect a return call. Free Funny Voicemail Greetings Recordings Home Free Funny Voicemail Greetings Recordings

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47. Hi, this is [name], [company]’s [job title]. I’m happy to help you with [task], but I’m currently away from my phone. Leave a quick message and I’ll return your call as soon as I can. Thanks!

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47. Hi, this is [name], [company]’s [job title]. I’m happy to help you with [task], but I’m currently away from my phone. Leave a quick message and I’ll return your call as soon as I can. Thanks!

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