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And my cousin, she's a real girly-girl and you can actually tell from her voice and all she says in her voicemail greeting is:

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3. Funny Examples of Voicemail Messages. These can be used to play tricks on people on April fools day or for any other reason. Use with discretion. If you don't have a time machine, please leave a message and I'll get back with you in the future.
In sales, immediate communication with your prospects and current customers is important. Being available to answer questions or further negotiate a deal allows your clients to feel secure and more apt to purchase from you. But what if you can’t answer the phone when they call? Make sure you have a voicemail system set up so your clients have the opportunity to leave you a message. .

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The longer it gets, the more likely your potential client will hang up because they are annoyed.
I can't come to the phone right now because I'm down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of 20 dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handiwork, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone. If you're from the Department of the Treasury, please ignore this message.

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#6 [automated robot] “The number you have reached, 717-555-9406, is not available. Please leave a message at the beep.” [/automated robot]
30. Hello, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m currently out of the office and will return on [X date]. If your call requires urgent attention, please call [Name] at [phone number] and they’ll be happy to assist you. If not, leave a message and I’ll return your call when I get back.

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Hello, this is Jason's voice. Jason's not here right now -- hey, haven't you ever lost YOUR voice? Well, believe you me, when I find him again, I'll have a few choice words for him. If you do too, leave them after the beep.

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If a telephone rings in an empty room and no one is there to answer it, was there really a phone call? Help me investigate this phenomenon by leaving your name and number after the tone.

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    Fourth, wait patiently by your phone; one of us will come to you. You need to portray a sense of confidence, authority, and respect. If you would like to leave a voicemail message for an inmate, you must first have a Prepaid Account.

    Website: https://funny-about-money.com/phone-solicitor-discouragement-the-long-winded-voicemail-message/
    Hi. I am probably home, I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like. Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you.

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    Listing Results Funny Voicemails For Cell Phones Total 47 Results Webmail Member login Email finder

    There are very few cases in which our telephone answering service would recommend having an antiquated voicemail answer your incoming calls. A Courteous Communications can recommend these 10 recordings for personal use only. Your business callers may not appreciate these voicemail recordings, but your friends and family will surely get a kick out of them.
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    Don't you do it! Don't you dare! I don't want to hear it! Don't you beep! If you beep, I'll... Don't even think about it! Don't!

    Greetings. You’ve reached the office of [Name]. I’m either out of the office or gone for the day. However, your call is extremely import to me, so I’d appreciate it if you’d leave your message, along with your contact information, at the sound of the beep. Thank you for your call.
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    Does that mean the number of incoming calls and voice mails are also in massive decline in the world of veterinary medicine in favor of electronic communication? Probably not.

    With the Holiday season right around the corner, your office’s voicemail greeting should quickly inform callers of any potential changes in hours, days or availability. Oh, and what better way to spread holiday wishes than with a personalized, updated greeting – of course, while at the same time, keeping your clients and prospects in the loop of where you’ll be and when.
    Take the time to listen to calls, call back if necessary, use your cell phone when you’re out of town, and take care of anything actionable listed in the messages instead of watching your mailbox fill in. This kind of attention to detail can go a long way towards building a good reputation and image for the business. Good luck!

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I call bullshit. Why does he start describing what the guy is wearing when he gets out of the car?

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25. "Hello! Thanks for reaching out to [company]. We're closed today for the holiday, and will reopen tomorrow. If you leave your name, number, and a brief message, we'll give you a call when we're back in the office. Thanks again, and have a great day."

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10. "Hello, you've reached [X company]. We can't take your call right now, but please leave your name, contact information, and reason for reaching out, and one of our team members will be in touch within 24 hours."

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Hello, epicenter of the Universe, God speaking. If you leave your name, number, and prayer after the tone, I will call you back as soon as I can. Please note that I answer all prayers, but sometimes the answer is NO. Bless you, my child, and have a nice day.

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