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No1: Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.

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Website: https://weirdomatic.com/weird-and-funny-answering-machine-messages-thatll-make-you-laugh.html
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Get creative. Poke good-natured fun, or tease them with your dry or self-deprecating humor. Remember that the goal is to make them feel happy to start the day, and not the other way around!

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Now, here's where the embedded commands begin. I don't know if you've ever heard of Neurolinguistic Programming, NLP. I'm no Ninja at it, but I've learned a little bit about it through the years and if you can embed commands that aren't direct commands, not explicit, I'm commanding you to do this, but a subtle statement of a thing that embeds as a command to your subconscious mind, it can have an influencing effect on the other person.
Just when we think things can’t get any more brutal, Jimmy tells of how the main assailant – the Godmother if you will – begins to unleash her savage beating:

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Hey sugar, you call this number often? I bet you have answering machines bothering you all the time. Yes indeedy. Why don't you give me a call sometime and we can listen to some old recordings. I might even play my beep for you.

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This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed. We guarantee that Ninja Number will help grow your business. January 19, Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers: No one answers phone calls anymore; send me a text.

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    Hi, this is John's answering machine. He's not here, but I'm open to suggestions.

    – Hi, I will be studying at the University library till late. Cannot carry my phone inside. Will get back to you as soon as I can. So leave a message after the beep.
    Get professional voicemail greetings today! Lili is a professional voice talent based in Los Angeles with a deep warm voice that will make your business sound professional. Lili has been recording professional voicemails & messages on hold with a fast turnaround since 1997. Most recordings are …

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    Being that I have been at Holdcom for a few months now, I decided it was time to change my cell phone voicemail greeting to something a bit more polished. Keep in mind, I have had the same voicemail message for probably 6 years, just transferring the same greeting every time I would get a new... All posts Next

    "Hello, you've reached [name] at [company]. I'm unable to come to the phone right now. Leave your name and number, and I'll return your call as soon as I'm free. Thank you."
    Funny voicemail ideas could do that trick, won’t they? Whether it is for your home, office, or cell phone, set a good voicemail that will keep your callers laughing even after they’ve left you a message. Ideas for a Voicemail. These voicemail ideas may not come so easily for some of you. And who says that finding inspiration is a bad thing.

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    1. Hi! You have reached voicemail of (your name), (job title). I am currently away from my desk. Please leave your complete name, contact number and short message after beep and I will be sure to get back to you the time I am available. 2. Good morning. You have reached (company name or office name) of (name).

    03Hello, this is [your name] of [your company/business]. I’m not able to take your call at the moment. Please leave your details and a quick message and I will get back to you at the earliest time possible. Thanks in advance. This voicemail greeting for work lets your customers or colleagues know that you are busy attending to other matters. It also reassures them that you’ll get back to them when you receive their message.
    You are dazed, bewildered, trapped in a world with no time, where color collides with sound, and shadows explode. You see a sign up ahead. This is no ordinary answering device; this is "The Twilight Phone."

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    This call may be recorded or monitored for quality and training purposes. If you don’t wish this call to be monitored or recorded, then please let the answering machine know when you leave your message.

    And remember, while you’re busy returning your calls, Blitz can be automating other parts of your sales process. We can assign leads to your staff or even send emails to your customers.
    Funniest Voice Mail Ever Original Funny Voice mail

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As one of the best-selling VoIP devices, magicJack has allowed people to use their Internet connection to make both mobile and landline...

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Show off your pop culture knowledge and creativity when you take a famous movie quote and give it a cute relationship twist.

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Elements of a Good Business Voicemail Greeting. Typically, a good business voicemail greeting should comprise the following elements: A warm greeting. Your name, the name of your company and department name. Make an apology for being unable to take the call. Ask the caller to leave a message. Let the caller know when to expect a return call. Free Funny Voicemail Greetings Recordings Home Free Funny Voicemail Greetings Recordings

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*Quick Tip* If you have your very own salon app, then make sure you mention that in your voicemail as well! For more ideas on salon app marketing, click here.

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