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Here’s another funny one for those times you really want to lighten the business mood:
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24. "Thank you for calling [company]. We're closed for [holiday] from [date] until [date]. Please leave your message and we'll get back to you as soon as possible. Have a happy holiday season!"
Please be advised that these messages are posted here because I thought they was amusing and I thought that others might enjoy them also. If you are one of the people that left one of these messages and are offended by seeing it here just let me know and I'll take it down.
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You’re growing tired. Your eyelids are getting heavy. You feel very sleepy now. You are gradually losing your willpower and your ability to resist suggestions. When you hear the tone you will feel helplessly compelled to leave your name, number, and a message.
6. Vacation Voicemail Greetings. Hey, this is [your name] at [X company]. I am actually on a break at the moment, on the other side of the world! Please direct all phone calls to [alternate contact name] at [phone number] and emails to [X email address].
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These work voicemail greetings are for the work phone that you and only you use. They’re highly effective because they help you establish a relationship straight from the voicemail. Or they help you share an important update in a simple, straightforward way.
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Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get back to you.
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Listing Results Personal cell phone greetings samples All: 39 Results Convert App Compress Submit Your Post
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3. Thank you for calling GetVoIP, we are currently away due to the holiday, and our office will be closed from Monday the 12th, until Friday the 16th. We apologize for any inconvenience and look forward to serving you once we return. Please feel free to visit our website, GetVoIP.com, to learn more about how we can help.
Holy crap! I just found the recording of a fraternity brother's voicemail from college! I'll post EDIT: Right now... "Our new years resolution was to stay home more and answer our phone, but I guess we're not doing that. Leave a message after the beep " Choppy Prerecorded man's voice "Hello, Please leave a message after the tone " (verizon lady voice)- "Hello - 'Erik' (my voice) - is currently not available. Please leave a message after the tone. To leave a callback number press 5. " Sep 13, 2003 3,303 32 Its not so much where you are as when you are. I did that one once. Pissed the hell out of the telemarketers. See they have an autodialer which listens for the first bit of the phone call. If its something a person says then it hands the call to a person. For a while I also started answering the phone like an answering machine and got all sorts of people just hanging up on me. "Our new years resolution was to stay home more and answer our phone, but I guess we're not doing that. Leave a message after the beep " "Hello?......Hello?....I'm sorry, can you speak up please, I can barely here you....What's that?...I'm sorry, we're not home right now, please leave a message and we'll get back to you soon...." I like the "Hello? ", caught a few people talking to the answering machine with that one. "Hi mom, hi dad.. is not here." etc., etc.
Funny Answering Machine Messages. "Hi, we aren't in at the moment, if you are trying to sell us something please start speaking now and hang up at the beep, everyone else start speaking at the beep and hang up when you've finished." Â "Hi, you have reached the Borg collective.
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Need some ideas for funny voicemail greetings? Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers: No one answers phone …
God's Voice mail lol Jesus's Voice mail
5. Voicemail Greetings For Vacation. As mentioned above, alerting callers that they won’t be getting an immediate call back is of upmost importance for an entity’s reputation and a caller’s satisfaction.
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Hi, I am a machine. Why do you hate talking to me? I never hurt anyone. Can we talk after the beep?
If they don’t leave a message, you’ll never know who called. Some people may assume they should just call back later. But if you prefer to get back to them at your leisure, encourage them to leave a message.
Website: https://theawesomedaily.com/funny-ways-to-answer-the-phone-hello-we-have-plenty/
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I don't want to bore you with metaphysics, but how do you know this is an answering machine? Maybe it's a dream, or maybe it's an illusion, or maybe you don't really exist. One way to find out is to leave a message, and if it's reality, I will call you back.
Hi this is Andrew. If you are an ex-girlfriend, suck it up and move on. If not, I do have a life that is obviously being used so leave a message and if I have time, ill try to squeeze you in.
Sorry, Chris and Susan aren’t here right now. Please leave your name and number after the tone. If you are calling regarding an outstanding debt, please leave your message before the tone.
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So bottom line, I come up with a fair value. If my fair offer is acceptable to you. Again, speaking to their subconscious mind. I'm only a fair guy and all I'm going to do is treat them fairly. You'll subconscious mind get cash in two to four weeks or less, and here please know. Again, I'm just speaking to their nervousness. Nobody's going to try to sell you anything. Rest assured. I'm not interested in convincing you of doing anything. I'm just a local guy, friendly guy, and I'm looking to find a few properties.
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Need more ideas for professional voicemail greetings? Explore our blog. When you're ready to have your business voicemail greetings professionally recorded, get started here! Topics: Voicemail Messages subscribe to email updates Keep up to date on the latest phone system and voice recording trends, tips and ideas by getting new blog posts delivered to your email inbox for FREE!
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I think that's hilarious! Hope that helps! This is not a voicemail; this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you and I'll think about returning your call. I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember.
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Spice up your phones with these funny answering machine messages I've put in for you guys. Beam your phone up with these great ringtones from the Star Trek tv series. Sound effects from the s Answering Machine Funnys. Singing, Coca-Cola Version. Spice Girls
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This guy is looking to get rid of his "blackish white groundhog guinea pig" and wants us to come pick it up.
These voicemail ideas may not come so easily for some of you. And who says that finding inspiration is a bad thing. It’s natural; not everyone has a funny bone inside them. But that doesn’t mean you get stuck with a boring, cliché greeting. It has to be different and contain some kind of style. And to that, I would like to give you a list of messages. They are perfect alternatives when you want to add some uniqueness to your voicemail. These cool voicemail ideas given below will take the mundane effects off and leave you with fresh sounding voicemail messages. So take a look at some funny greetings that you can use as your funny cell phone voicemail ideas (or home phone).
Hello, your name summer home. Leave your message at the tone. Hello, and welcome to Answering Machines of the Rich and Famous!
If you are tired of a robotic voice then why not use the facility allotted to you, and create voicemail greeting in your style, that suits your personality, whether professional or short voicemail greeting that will talk behalf of yours when you can’t attend the call for any reason. Get it with the tutorial, and learn how to create a custom voicemail message on iPhone. This voicemail trick is useful for all iPhone models users, Latest one & iPhone 11, iPhone 11 Pro, iPhone 11 Pro Max, iPhone XR, iPhone X, iPhone XS/XS Max, iPhone X, 8(8 Plus), iPhone 7(7 Plus), iPhone 6S/6S+, iPhone 6/6+, iPhone 5S/5. How to Create Personal Voicemail Greeting on iPhoneWhat You Should Do before Recording Professional Voicemail Greeting on iPhone?Sample Good Greeting Voicemail For iPhone How to Create Personal Voicemail Greeting on iPhone What You Should Do before Recording Professional Voicemail Greeting on iPhone?
Are you thinking about changing your voicemail greeting? Would you like some help from us? Set up a cranky, funny voicemail, and share a moment of laughter with your dear ones, before they understand your intention behind it and run to get you!
Recent trends in voicemail have leaned towards the desire for many individuals to relate on other forms of digital message than traditional voice mails. More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time. However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller.
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Funny voicemail messages are an excellent alternative for people that are looking for that unique touch for something that seems really mundane. If you’re having trouble coming up with your own then you can check out some of the funny voicemail messages below.
For small businesses, there are a variety of voicemail service providers you can use that offer different features. From transcription and voice to text to more convenient features of handling multiple phones through one number, availability varies by service. Shared voicemail and call routing is intended for multiple access and directing calls to one or multiple phones. Mobile apps are also available that allow you to check your messages from your phone. The below infographic outlines the current state and trends of voicemails.
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A is for academics, B is for beer. So leave a message. After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. Finally get an answering machine. Now how does this thing work? Press record button, I did that, and the light should be on. Hmmmm, I wonder what this button does……. This call may be recorded or monitored for quality and training purposes.
Do you find yourself putting pen to paper, staring blankly at the wall, searching for just what to say? Well, know that it happens to the best of us. To help you out, we’ve included some voicemail greeting samples for you to look at. Both the 10 formal and 10 informal samples should give you the prompting you need to start crafting your own voicemail script.
Inspirational Quotes. Leave your caller with something meaningful to think about. Mark Twain . The classic adage "when greatness calls" can be used as a funny greeting."When greatness calls, I may not be able to pick up my phone immediately, so leave a message."
3. The Musical Greetings. (To the tune of Barney the Dinosaur’s “I Love You”) I called you, you called me, we are a calling family, apparently. Leave a message!
Avoid background noise. Whether you have music playing in your office, or you’re sitting in a coffee shop, background noise can make it difficult for your customers to understand your greeting. Limit the noise around you when you leave your voicemail greeting.
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Interesting Voicemail Greeting Examples to Cheer Up Your Callers Thus, it is important for you to be clear while recording such messages. Here are a few examples of voicemail greetings to get an idea about appropriate messages that can be recorded the …
After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. Finally get an answering machine. Now how does this thing work?
Wow – I just read what I typed and even I can't make sense of the prolix drivel. However, I'm in no shape to attempt anything better so give it the old college try and let me know what you make of it. I'm expecting an entertaining, yet informative response, but I would certainly understand a visit from a cpl of guys wearing white lab coats driving an unremarkable, windowless van :/
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10. T-Mobile Visual Voicemail. T-Mobile Visual Voicemail is yet another great voicemail tool for your android devices for accessing and managing your voicemails.
19. Hi, you’ve reached [employee name]’s voicemail box. [Employee first name] no longer works for [company name]. Please call our main line at [phone number] and we’ll be happy to connect you with a current team member who can help.
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This script is very informative for motivated sellers. However, I do not have the years of experience you mentioned in the beginning. Still worth a try because I can tweak it.
If your phone has a Lady Gaga ring-back tone, then I can’t guarantee I’ll wait for you to answer. 5. …I would thank you for calling, but I haven’t heard what you have to say yet. Just kidding! I’ll return your call as soon as possible. Thanks! 6. …If you’re Jennifer Lawrence, call my emergency line. (Insert your celebrity crush
7. The Friendly Script. If you want to get a callback that will make your day, you need to be enthusiastic and sound exciting. The prospect might be enchanted to listen to your voicemail till the end.
No18: I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember. I'd appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and telling me something about myself. Thanks.
5. "Hello, [Person's name] is chasing new adventures and is no longer with [Company name]. Please forward all future requests to [New or interim person's name] at [phone number]. Thank you!"
After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. I’ll get back to you as soon as it’s safe for you to come out of hiding.
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Please read what the event is about. It is NOT about people asking questions on issues. It is about "How can Congress effectively use Facebook". :) Facebook DC Live: Sen. John Cornyn (R-Tex.) | Facebook (http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=105580199526052)
Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us. The new number is Yes, same number.
39 Humorous and Witty Voicemail Greetings. Oct 28, 2015. Jan 7, 2014 by Brandon Gaille. Recent trends in voicemail have leaned towards the desire for many individuals to relate on other forms of digital message than traditional voice mails. More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time.
These voicemail ideas may not come so easily for some of you. And who says that finding inspiration is a bad thing. It’s natural; not everyone has a funny bone inside them. But that doesn’t mean you get stuck with a boring, cliché greeting. It has to be different and contain some kind of style. And to that, I would like to give you a list of messages. They are perfect alternatives when you want to add some uniqueness to your voicemail. These cool voicemail ideas given below will take the mundane effects off and leave you with fresh sounding voicemail messages. So take a look at some funny greetings that you can use as your funny cell phone voicemail ideas (or home phone).
Thank you for calling [LinkedPhone – Where Freedom Rings!]. You’ve reached us outside of business hours. Please select from one of the following options: [for business hours press 1; to leave a message press 2; if this is an emergency, press 0 to be directed to our 24-hour customer success team.] We are grateful for your call and we look forward to speaking with you soon!
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