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Hey Jake, if I wanted to email you, I would’ve emailed you. It’s not like I forgot email existed until I heard your voice mail greeting and thought “Holy crap! TOTALLY forgot about that whole email thing! Let me hang up on this phone call and waste another 5 minutes sending you an email that would have taken me 20 seconds to speak.”

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When your small business is closed, ensure that your callers know that! If appropriate, you might want to reiterate your business hours to manage callback expectations.
Woman Breaks Down How To Shut Down Men Asking For Your Number With Fake Voicemail - FAIL Blog - Funny Fails .

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This call may be recorded or monitored for quality and training purposes. If you don't wish this call to be monitored or recorded, then please let the answering machine know when you leave your message.
Show off your pop culture knowledge and creativity when you take a famous movie quote and give it a cute relationship twist.

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Since this clip surfaced on the Internet in early 2005, several radio programs have aired interviews with persons claiming to have some involvement with this audio clip. On 4 February 2005, the nationally syndicated Coast to Coast AM show put through a caller who maintained he was the person who had been beaten by the women as described in the purported voicemail message. In late February, several stations broadcast
Holiday Voicemail Script Sample. Thank you for calling ABC Company. We are currently closed for the holiday. Our normal business hours are 8 am to 8 pm, eastern time, Monday through Friday. Your call is very important to us. Please leave your name, phone number, and a brief message regarding your …

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I can’t come to the phone right now because I’m down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of 20 dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handi- work, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone. If you’re from the Department of the Treasury, please ignore this message.

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Hello! Thanks for calling [LinkedPhone. We’re currently tied up assisting other entrepreneurs & small businesses at the moment]. But please leave your name, number, and the reason for your call and we will get back to you as soon as possible. We look forward to working with you. Thank you.

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    Voicemail: [You can listen to the above video to hear my actual voicemail, and you can also snag the scrip verbatim by simply leaving us a comment below, tell us how you feel about it. 🙂 ]

    Dear Fear It S Time We Go Our Separate Ways Moving Forward I Will Block All Contact With You Next Time You Call My New Secret Separate Ways Dear You Call
    No22: Bob here. I'm home right now, I'm just screening my calls. So start talking and if you're someone I want to speak with I'll pick up the phone. Otherwise, well, what can I say?

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    9. OK, so I followed all the instructions that came with the machine. I pressed all the necessary buttons. So… now what? I… am… so… confused. Could you please… beep.

    Hi, this is Tom, the sales manager at Orlando Powersports. I’m either busy assisting customers, getting ready for our End of Season Sale, featuring deep discounts on our huge selection of power sports equipment and gear or if I’m really lucky, I’m out riding the latest CAN-AM DS 250! Leave a message, and I will call you back as soon as possible. Thanks for calling!
    3. Using Prerecorded Messages. Leave Me A Message And Wait By Your Phone Till I Can Call You Back. Hi There! Your Name Is Not Here At The Moment. How Can Someone Keep A Dork In Suspense?

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    7 Funniest Insults That You Can Tell Your Best Friends7 Funniest Riddles That Will Make You Think and Laugh25 Funniest Gifts That Will Surely Be Appreciated10 Funniest Commencement Speeches to Keep You Awake7 Funny Things That Only People Who Exercise Would Understand

    03Hello, this is [your name] of [your company/business]. I’m not able to take your call at the moment. Please leave your details and a quick message and I will get back to you at the earliest time possible. Thanks in advance. This voicemail greeting for work lets your customers or colleagues know that you are busy attending to other matters. It also reassures them that you’ll get back to them when you receive their message.
    No32: (Noisy pick-up of phone.) Hi, I'm a burglar and I was just about to steal Troy's answering machine. If you give me your name and number I'll... Uh, I'll post it on the fridge where he'll see it. Uh... By the way, where did you say you live?

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    I personally don't like voicemail. I don't check messages because my phone identifies missed calls. I know who these people are and why they are calling. I don't want to spend (waste)time hearing nothing of importance. I have left messages saying

    A special high five to Margot Howard for her outstanding research and contributions to this article. We love working with and supporting like-minded entrepreneurs who are passionate about business success strategies. Thank you Margot! ❤️
    3. Business Voicemail Greetings. Hello, you've reached the Sales Department at [X company]. We can't take your call right now, but please leave your name, contact information, and the reason for reaching out, and one of our team members will be in touch within 24 hours.

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A funny voicemail greeting is one of those things that seems like a good idea...until you hear it time and time again. For business and professional life, funny voicemail greetings just doesn't make sense. If you're expecting an important call, or trying to impress someone you certainly won't want them irritated by your voicemail message. Here are 5 examples of funny phone greetings, and why you shouldn't use them on your cell.

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"Hi. You've reached my voicemail. Please leave your name, number, and a damn good reason why this conversation couldn't be done over text."

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Zombies doing whatever zombies do when they are feeling exultant and joyous...about brains. eerie spooky horror dreamlike Halloween uneasy strange distant ambient haunted abandoned - mp3 version abandoned - ogg version abandoned - waveform abandoned - spectrogram 59521.1

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