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All right guys. So there you go. That's my voicemail message that I've crafted carefully over the last 18 years in the game. You need to use this as a starting point only for creating your own version of this. And then I'd really like to hear from you what you think about this and how it works for you. Tell me a comment below. Just talk to me. Tell me how this strikes you. Is there anything about the script that you like or don't like especially? I'm open-minded… talk to me. Thanks guys. Keep it awesome. Happy investing. JP Out.
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Home » Lists » 21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages
Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us.
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Various messages for using with my cellphone voicemail. - I certify that I am over 13 years old. - I agree to the privacy policy and the terms of usage. Membership is free, secure and easy.
"Yesterday I got home and I saw the phone machine blinking. I was so happy! I thought 'A message for me! Hooray!' "But when I listened to the tape, there was only a dial tone.
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A custom phone greeting is a recording that plays automatically when a customer calls. They can be set to play right at the start as a professional welcome, as a voicemail greeting, or even as an away message when you can’t answer.
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2. Hello you’ve reached Matt Grech, I’ll be out of the office for the next few days due to the holidays. Feel free to leave a message, or you can shoot me an email at Matt@GetVoIP if something urgent pops up. I’ll be sure to get back to you as soon as I return to the office. Happy holidays!
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About: Creative Voicemail Messages has free scripts for voicemails ranging from funny voicemail messages to professional voicemail greetings. Voicemail Messages. Creative - Cool and creative voicemails that you use for your cellphone. Funny - Humorous voicemail greetings for …
My friend found a recording of a man rifling off purposely confusing voice mail instructions. It's really fast, and he keeps saying numbers and number combinations... I wish I had it....
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"Hello. No one's home and the answering machine isn't working. This is the refrigerator. Please leave your message with me and I'll stick it to myself with this magnet. Thank you." MacRumors attracts a broad audience of both consumers and professionals interested in the latest technologies and products. We also boast an active community focused on purchasing decisions and technical aspects of the iPhone, iPod, iPad, and Mac platforms.
So, some of the embedded commands that are in here, I made them purple but are also in all caps. Just to make sure I remember to emphasize it a little bit as I'm talking, so just to give you an idea, Mr. Seller, here's how I make it easy and convenient when you sell your house to me.
4. Provide your voicemail system's password. You will be prompted to enter the passcode to your voicemail account, if you have set one (which, hopefully, you have).
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Holiday Voicemail Script Sample. Thank you for calling ABC Company. We are currently closed for the holiday. Our normal business hours are 8 am to 8 pm, eastern time, Monday through Friday. Your call is very important to us. Please leave your name, phone number, and a brief message regarding your …
15. Hello, you’ve called [X Business Name]. We are currently closed. Our opening hours are [State opening hours]. Please visit our company website at [company website URL], or email us at [X email address]. If you’d like a callback, please leave your name and phone number, and our team will get in touch with you within 24 hours.
but I'm doing this NOW, while you're listening to it LATER, except for but whatever you have to say to him, you can tell me. We're VERY close Bwana fella no home now, so you fella leave talkie-talk. Bwana 'im big fella mek talkie-talk back real fas'.
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22. Hello, this is [your name]. I’m currently away from my phone. I return calls on Tuesday and Friday at 10 a.m. Please leave a detailed message including your name and a callback number and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.
“We are thrilled to be partnering with YouMail to help entertainers such as Katt Williams connect with their fans through YouMail’s unique and innovative voicemail service,” said Gary Binkow, CEO of Salient Media. “YouMail offers not only a way to connect entertainers with their fans, but also gives fans the opportunity to express their personality and interests in a new and exciting way.”
7. I can’t come to the phone right now because I’m down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of twenty-dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handiwork, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone.
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I can’t come to the phone right now because I’m down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of 20 dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handi- work, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone. If you’re from the Department of the Treasury, please ignore this message.
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Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
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Morgan Freeman is known for his voice so much that he was asked to play the voice and image of God in Bruce Almighty. Allow him to greet your callers and prompt them to leave a message for you. I wish I could tell you that Morgan Freeman was available to take your call. I wish I could tell you that, but this is no fairytale world. Morgan Freeman is gone now; to where I cannot say. Click here to experience this voicemail message on Youtube. Stephen Colbert asked Samuel L. Jackson to record his infamous voice on his outgoing message recording.
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2. Access the dial pad. You'll need to bring up the Phone app's dial pad, as if you were going to call an actual person. To do this, tap the dial pad icon near the bottom of the screen.
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A voicemail and voicemail greeting are two different things. A voicemail serves to leave a message and contact information to an individual or business. A voicemail greeting serves to welcome those who call while you are out, encouraging them to leave a message and contact information. A well-crafted voicemail greeting also serves as a tool where one can leave a good first impression.
#2 “Hey this is Bryan, leave me a message at the beep. Like you needed me to tell you that, right? I mean, how many times have you done this? You already know what to do.”
Just kidding. Do you know of a funnier voice message? Leave it in the comments below! Author: Michael C Michael has over 30 years of executive call center and answering service experience. Post Comment Cancel reply Your email address will not be published.Need some ideas for funny voicemail greetings? Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers:. Our previous post on funny voicemail greetings got so much attention, we thought we'd continue….
Hi this is Andrew. If you are an ex-girlfriend, suck it up and move on. If not, I do have a life that is obviously being used so leave a message and if I have time, ill try to squeeze you in.
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As one of the best-selling VoIP devices, magicJack has allowed people to use their Internet connection to make both mobile and landline...
29. Hi, this is [your name] at [X company]. I am on vacation right now and won’t be back to the office until [X date]! Please leave me your name, phone number, and the reason you are calling, and I will get back to you then. Alternatively, you can phone [Name] at [phone contact information]. Thank you for calling!
For example, a voice mail message appointment reminder call might say the following: “Ms. Smith, Fluffy’s next veterinary appointment at [name of practice] is on Monday the 12th at 1:00. Please respond to the email we are sending you now to confirm the appointment.”
28. Hello, you’ve reached [your name]. I can’t come to the phone right now, probably because I’ve just stepped away from my desk, but possibly because I’m trapped under something heavy. Leave a message and I’ll call you back within one business day — and if I don’t, please send help.
No11: "You have called 655-9229. If you are my mom, I will write you as soon as I can, I promise. If you are my son, sorry, I am broke too. If you are a friend, leave a message after the tone. If you are a salesman...FORGET IT." No12: This is not an answering machine -- this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you, and I'll think about returning your call.
Image credit to Far Reach Inc. http://www.farreachinc.com/blog/far-reach/2015/01/08/ho-ho-oh-how-to-create-unforgettable-corporate-holiday-greetings
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2. Hi, you’ve reached [your name]’s voicemail box. I can’t come to the phone right now, but if you leave your contact information I’ll get back to you within 24 hours.
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-Hello. I’m sorry I didn’t answer your call. I’m just waiting for more important people to call. If I hear your message and deem you worthy of the title “important,” I will think about calling you back, but for now. Bye! -Beep-
No10: (Very fast:) Hi, this is 904-4344. If you want to leave a message, please wait for the tone. If you want to leave your name and number, please press pound, press 3, then dial your name, then press 6 and dial your number. If you want to leave your name and just a message, press star, press 6, ask for extension 4443, then leave your name and message. If you want to leave your number and the time you called, please press star twice, spin in a circle, press 1 twice, talk loud and BEEP
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Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
Now, towards the end, I want to be sure and set the expectation that I'm probably not going to be in a position to pay you full market value for your property and I explained why. However, I can pay a fair price based on the condition and the situation you have at hand.
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Hi, this is John's answering machine. He's not here, but I'm open to suggestions.
Want to snag it (even as a starting point) so you don't have to go back through that video and type the whole freaking thing out?
“You know what I hate about voice-mail messages? They go on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really need to say is, “We aren’t in, leave a message.” That’s why, I’ve decided to keep mine simple and short. I pledge to you, my caller that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me. Bye!”
Typically, a good business voicemail greeting should comprise the following elements: A warm greeting. Your name, the name of your company and department name. Make an apology for being unable to take the call. Ask the caller to leave a message. Let the caller know when to expect a return call.
Hello, epicenter of the Universe, God speaking. If you leave your name, number, and prayer after the tone, I will call you back as soon as I can. Please note that I answer all prayers, but sometimes the answer is NO. Bless you, my child, and have a nice day.
Time to give stuff away again! And golly, you guys just can't get enough, can you? 🙂 Our letter of intent Our burned house letter Our option agreement Our motivated seller postcard 47 MLS keywords for REI A motivated seller phone script
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21. "Hello, you've reached [your name, the office of X company]. The team is currently out of the office, but we'll be back on [date] stuffed with good food and eager to speak with you. Leave your name, number, and — if you're so inclined — your favorite [holiday dish, Thanksgiving tradition, etc.]"
Thank you for calling [LinkedPhone]. Due to the current pandemic, our team members are working remotely and are available [Monday through Friday from 9am to 7pm Eastern Standard Time]. Please leave a message with your name, number, and how we can serve you. We will respond as promptly as possible. Thank you for your patience during this unprecedented time. Let’s get through this together. Stay safe and well.
Live long and prosper. Click here to listen to the Star Trek voicemail greeting on Youtube. Hello, can you hear me? Hello from Ellen. Click here to hear how Hepburn brings these words to life. So please, leave a message at the sound of the beep… for the sake of anthropology. Hopkins later said that Hepburn's voice was, in part, the basis for Hannibal Lecter's voice in Silence of the Lambs.
If the problem persists, please report this issue to YouMail Support Team. Greeting Copied To Your Account. It will now appear inside your YouMail account under your [Greetings] tab. You can set this as your default greeting, or pick specific Contacts to hear it. Go To My Account Now.
10. Hi, you’ve reached (name)’s answering machine. He/she is not in right now, but I’m totally open for suggestions.
A clever, witty voicemail message can be short or long, complex or simple, as long as it is entertaining. Using famous lines from TV shows or movies is a great place to start. There is a lot of creative wordplay that you can use based on famous lines from classics like The Twilight Zone. For instance, you could say, "Hello, you've reached the Twilight Phone, where every message is sent into another dimension. To receive an interdimensional call, just leave your name and number, and I'll call you from the closest parallel universe."
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