Sorry, Chris and Susan aren’t here right now. Please leave your name and number after the tone. If you are calling regarding an outstanding debt, please leave your message before the tone.
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Not sure if this is real or not (and either is snopes, see below). But, it sure is funny. Happy Monday! EDIT: Try this link. This is where I got it from, I didn't try the one below and it apparently doesn't work: Claim: Voicemail message describes a confrontation between a male motorist and four women after a minor traffic accident.

Don't mess with Bible-totin' old ladies.. Read this little explanation and then listen to the voicemail. You just have to laugh with the guy. On a recent Spurs trip, we were asking one of our sponsors who works at Jack in the Box for some funny stories or experiences with the company. The funniest story he had was when an operations manager was late for a meeting and called his boss to tell him he was running late. As he was leaving the voice mail message, he witnessed an accident and went on to provide "play by play" of the incident. After telling us the story, he promised to send us a copy of the voice mail and here it is. This is the actual voice mail message. It was passed along and forwarded so many times within Jack in the Box; it crashed their voice mail server. Origins: In one memorable episode of the 1970s television sitcom All in the Family, Archie Bunker is involved in a minor traffic accident and, eager to cash in on the incident, rushes out and engages a Jewish lawyer to sue the other party. However, after conferring with the defendant's attorney, Archie's lawyer advises him that he has http://www.snopes.com/autos/graphics/fight.gif no case, as the other side's witnesses are too strong. There's an old legal precept, he informs Archie: "You can't beat a station wagon full of nuns." Perhaps Archie Bunker couldn't beat a station wagon full of nuns, but according to a circulating audio clip, an Impala full of Bible-toting middle-aged women could beat (literally!) the motorist who ran into them. We present the recording for your listening enjoyment through [url="http://www.snopes.com/autos/audio/jackbox.mp3"]this (http://home.swbell.net/kf5tv/voicemail.mp3) link. The file size of the clip is over 4MB, so please be patient while it downloads. As to the questions of whether the account given above is an accurate explanation of the origins of this audio clip, and whether the traffic incident described actually took place, we have to leave them as "Undetermined" for now. A inquiry posed to the corporate offices of Jack in the Box restaurants produced the following response: Thank you for your inquiry. The message that has been in circulation is an actual voice mail message. The incident occurred 5-6 years ago in Texas. I'm not sure how the recording got outside the company or if the employee still works for Jack in the Box, but the recording periodically re-surfaces on the radio and the internet. Even if this explanation is accurate (i.e., the clip originated as a message left on a Jack in the Box employee's voicemail), it doesn't preclude the possibility that the accident described never took place, and the recording was just a prank one employee pulled on a co-worker. -Now I lay me down to sleep; Leave a message at the beep. If I should die before I wake, remember to erase the tape. what is the best voicemail app “I don’t know who you are but if you don’t let my daughter go now, I will find you; I will kill you. Please leave a message.” 25. "Hello! Thanks for reaching out to [company]. We're closed today for the holiday, and will reopen tomorrow. If you leave your name, number, and a brief message, we'll give you a call when we're back in the office. Thanks again, and have a great day." The display of third-party trademarks and trade names on this site does not necessarily indicate any affiliation or endorsement of webcontactus.com. Be Part Of Our Story! what does default iphone greeting sound like 6. Voicemail Greetings For The Holidays. Hi, you’ve reached (insert name and title) at (insert company.) We’ve taken this time to be with our family’s and stuff our bellies. funny greetings for mothers day Voicemail greetings are not memorable. Most of them are exactly the same and therefore, provide no surprise to the person on the other end of the line. When people see, hear and experience the expected, they tend to forget it very quickly. Funny voicemail greetings give your callers a sense of shock. That shock is not easily forgotten. Not only will this encourage sharing and engagement (which I will get to later), but it will also give you a distinct advantage when you return the call. funny voicemail phone numbers Voicemail Script #7: The Friendly Script. If you want to get a callback that will make your day, you need to be enthusiastic and sound exciting. The prospect might be enchanted to listen to your voicemail till the end. Here’s an example of a sales voicemail script with a … Contact Us No14: Hello, epicenter of the Universe, God speaking. If you leave your name, number, and prayer after the tone, I will call you back as soon as I can. Please note that I answer all prayers, but sometimes the answer is NO. Bless you, my child, and have a nice day. Send Message Create an account. I agree to the license terms. Sign Up You already have an account? Login here. how do you listen to a voice message on instagram But then the bag flies open and among the contents that fall out is a bible. So she pick’s it up and starts to pummel the man with that too. 3. Have Some Fun. Oftentimes, your voicemail greeting is the first impression a caller gets of your personality, your brand, and your business. And as the old adage reminds us, first impressions are everything. Just because it’s your business voicemail, doesn’t mean you have to sound like a robot. 08You’ve reached the voicemail of [your business/company]. We are under new management and will be hosting a re-opening on [dates] where you can come and meet the team and have a chance to learn more about our enhanced services and new products. To leave a voicemail message, press the # key and someone from our team will call you back within 24 hours. This voicemail greeting is used to communicate information regarding changes to any business activities. It specifies how customers can communicate and do business with you, during any transition time. Obviously the women had taken umbrage to his crashing into them and the rest of this street gang then jumped out of the car; continuing their assault: Practice your spiel so you can speak with authority. This lets the caller know how confident, qualified, and prepared you are. The goal is to sound like you’ve been doing this for years, not a few minutes. 1. If you are a burglar, then we’re probably at home cleaning our weapons right now and can’t come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren’t home and it’s safe to leave us a message. ! how to put a voice message on my lg phone how to make a personal voicemail greeting on iphone funny greetings for christmas Close Project funny voicemail greetings mp3 Yes, it draws out the curiosity seekers and then it filters them out before you waste your time on the phone with them. So for us it moves the ball forward with a much higher ratio of the right people. Even if we're actually speaking with fewer people by comparison, but how do you do that effectively? Well, good news in my 18 years in the game now I think I've got it down pretty solid. A finely tuned voicemail script you're looking at right here for seller calls. That's part art and part social science. I think it sets the stage for people and filters out tire kickers, sets the ball beautifully for us to then pass it over for a proper conversation. So I want to walk you through my script and I want to walk you through the 24 hour script for absentee owners in this video. It was also when I didn’t have to worry about getting “professionals” calling me. If you might have to worry about that, I highly recommend you don’t use these and just enjoy them. The singing messages are about 30 seconds long to sing, which is long for a voice mail, but that’s these lyrics’ “price” of fun. 41 Funniest Voicemail Greetings in the World. Many years ago, in a time before cell phones (Yes it exists, and I remember it!) I used to get inundated with phone calls to my landline at all times of day and night. -Hi, this is ______. I’m sorry I can’t answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back. ‘Crash Bandicoot: On the Run’ Halloween Update Out Now with Themed Battle Runs, Spooky Costumes, Seasonal Gangs and Bosses, and More Contact us Terms and rules Privacy policy Accessibility Statement Help Home RSS Hey, it's ________. Sorry you can't get through. Leave your name and your number and I'll get back to you. how to record a personal voicemail greeting funny greetings for emails best voicemail scripts for business Close Project best voicemail recording 6. "Hi, this is [your name]. I'm either on a call or away from my desk. Please leave your name, number, and a brief message and I'll get back to you. Thank you. funny greetings for wedding hi you've reached the home of (name) also known as 007 agents if you get this machine we are probably saving the world this tape will self destruct in 5...4...3...2...1... (BEEP) A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future…. We hope you enjoyed these funny voicemail greetings! Since our business answering service is open 24 hours a day, you’ll never be greeted by a voicemail greeting requesting you to leave a message. However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so we hope these funny … Brought to you by Best Answering Service. This is a magic voicemail message. Leave a message. Leave a message at the beep. Oh, here it is. Hi, thanks for calling. If you need to reach me right away call my personal line as purposefully leave of one numberthat Hi, I am available to the phone right now but I take the calls in order of importance. You may hold or leave a message at the beep. Hi. Do you ever feel, like, your head is full of sand, not your regular loose sand mind you, but compacted sand, and there were like, I dunno, bugs or something jumping up and down on the compacted sand? Well, sometimes I do. Bye. funny missed call greetings funny voicemail greetings for work how to kiss on the cheek greeting Close Project best voicemail welcome message No23: This is Dan Cassidy's answering machine. Please leave your name and number, and after I've doctored the tape, your message will implicate you in a federal crime and be brought to the attention of the FBI. Top 13 Professional Voicemail Greetings – Examples, Scripts, Samples, Audio Recordings I have a confession to make: I haven’t recorded a new voicemail greeting since 2014. In the past four years, I (hopefully) have become more articulate, poised, and self-assured. But hear my voicemail recording, and you’d think I was still new to the work world, a little unsure of myself — and probably not an authority. Obviously I need toupdate it. And if you haven’t changed your voicemail greeting in over a year, you’re likely in the same boat. After all, a professional voicemail recording boosts your credibility, makes you seem more competent, and encourages whoever’s listening to it to continue the relationship. A relatively unprofessional one — like mine, for instance — does the opposite: It encourages prospects, recruiters, and potential connections to run in the other direction. With that in mind, I’ve written 18 unique voicemail greetings for every situation. Pick your favorite, practice a few times, then record your new voicemail. Funny - Humorous voicemail greetings for your amusement and use. Today I've decided to end our friendship, but I realized that you know all of my darkest secrets, so we will have to continue this relationship till the end of time. Hey, how are you? Just wanted to let you know that I'm not here so leave a message! 4. Voicemail greetings for calls received after business hours. You don’t want to answer calls 24/7 (unless you’re serving clients globally and there’s an expectation of 24/7 support). A special high five to Margot Howard for her outstanding research and contributions to this article. We love working with and supporting like-minded entrepreneurs who are passionate about business success strategies. Thank you Margot! ❤️ funny voicemail notifications good business voicemail greetings free professional voicemail greetings Close Project what does default iphone greeting sound like Hello, your name summer home. Leave your message at the tone. Hello, and welcome to Answering Machines of the Rich and Famous! Please leave your name, telephone number, and a brief message in a voice similar to mine, and your call will be returned as soon as humanly possible. This is Chris. This is his refrigerator.Need some ideas for funny voicemail greetings? Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers:. 4. Sincere and Short Voicemail Messages for Personal Use. These answering machine messages are the type that most people leave. These can be used for non-business or personal phones. Hello, this is the Brown residence. We're in the middle of a family fight right now. Leave your name and number at the beep and whoever wins will call you right back. Hi there! You’ve reached the domicile of Blackmore Enterprises [Horn Honk]. We’re sorry to have missed your call, but there’s only so many hours in the day where one has the chance to gut a zombie, or nail a corpse to a tree. As such, please leave your name, contact information, and message, and we’ll try to get back to you as soon as we can. Thanks much for your call. Leave your personal name or business name Say you’re sorry you missed the call Ask them to leave their contact information and message Thank them for their call How To Get Google Voice Voicemail To Work With Tracfone Jesse S Blag Google Voice How To Get Tech Company Logos 10. 1-888-447-5594: Epic speech. This last entry on the prank call numbers list is one that is slightly out of the box. These digits are an Easter Egg line for the ending of the video game God of War. what's the best voicemail app for android what's the best voicemail app for android funny indian voice message Close Project voicemail sample greeting messages 20. Hi, you’ve reached [your name]’s phone. I’m busy making deals or rock climbing [replace with your personal hobbies], so leave your contact information and a brief message so I can call you back when I have a free moment. A special high five to Margot Howard for her outstanding research and contributions to this article. We love working with and supporting like-minded entrepreneurs who are passionate about business success strategies. Thank you Margot! ❤️ Written by Aja Frost @ajavuu You’ve reached [LinkedPhone – Where Freedom Rings]. We are currently off-duty. Our business hours are [Monday through Saturday, 9am to 7pm Eastern Standard Time]. Please leave your name, number, and the reason for your call and we’ll get back to you on the next business day. Thank you. No40: Hello, you've reached 344-1312, the Apartment at the End of the Universe. Please leave your message, name and number at the sound of the tone. Keep your hands, feet, extremities and obscenities inside the car at all times. Enjoy your ride. Very funny. This website is so cool. And those conversation is so funny. I think I have seen the best comedy here. Just awesome you know! 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