You are dazed, bewildered, trapped in a world with no time, where color collides with sound, and shadows explode. You see a sign up ahead. This is no ordinary answering device; this is "The Twilight Phone."
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"Hello, this is John. I'm not home right now, but I can take a message. Hang on a second while I get a pencil." (background noise - open a drawer and shuffle stuff around.) "OK, what would you like me to tell me?" If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will transferred to the mother ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer. If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until someone comes on the line. If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name. If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep, or before the beep, or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you."
File Name: 911.wav File Size: 499 KB Text: "Thank you for calling 911. All of our offices are busy right now, please call back later .." File Name: afterlife.wav File Size: 611 KB Text: "Welcom to the afterlife voice mail system, if you are trying to reach heaven .." File Name: altzheimers.wav
Website: https://www.reference.com/world-view/examples-professional-voicemail-greeting-93942ec15af9e87a
Hi! I told you never to call me at this number. But since you did, I left the knife on your back porch…Check to see I got all the blood off. Don’t forget to leave a message, and we’ll talk about the…plan.
Website: http://allowe.com/laughs/book/88 Creative Answering Machine Messages.htm
Now I lay me down to sleep; leave a message at the beep. If I should die before I wake, remember to erase the tape.
7. A Classic Hepburn Answering Greeting for Voicemails. Katharine Hepburn’s iconic and feisty voice goes down in history and can add a bit of moxie to your voicemail greeting.
4. The Millennial Greeting. We don’t call anymore, text. Seriously? You’re calling, again? Can everything you have to say be condensed in a text message? Hello, this is [insert name].
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More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time. However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller. The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail. A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century.
Appfelstrudel - iPhone & iPad App Discovery menu Search Tips Browse Apps About YouMail Voicemail & Spam Block YouMail See also: Top 10 Apps like YouMail Voicemail & Spam Our top rated spam call blocker, robo call blocker & visual voicemail app will help you handle your phone calls better while protecting you against spam and robocalls. See for yourself why YouMail ha.. Read more Guffaw Funny Photo Video Booth Shweta Goyal See also: Top 10 Apps like Guffaw Funny Photo Video A Fun App to Change Face and Voice. Guffaw has many Face and Voice Changing Filters. You can also combine different Face effects to create your own. The possibilities are virtually endless. Go ahead.. Read more Trusted by top sales people to manage their voicemail. Stop unwanted, junk messages wasting your time. Magically turn those voicemails into text. Get the gist without listening. - Stop Rob.. Read more Funny Face Camera Booth Revosoft Technologies PTY LTD See also: Top 10 Apps like Funny Face Camera Booth Funny Face Camera Booth is a tool that allows you to custom morph anyone's face multiple times to make some crazy photos. You have full control over where you place the morph on the face as well as co.. Read more HulloMail Voicemail Thumbtel Ltd See also: Top 10 Apps like HulloMail Voicemail Our Award Winning Visual Voicemail App will help you read, play, search and share your voicemails with ease. Manage your voicemails better with custom greetings, voicemail sharing, voicemail to text a.. Read more Voxist: Visual Voicemail VOXIST See also: Top 10 Apps like Voxist: Visual Voicemail Voxist is an intelligent voicemail that replaces your carrier’s inefficient voicemail. Delight callers with customized greetings and save time by reading transcribed voicemail messages. Access message.. Read more World Voicemail Norwood Systems Pty Ltd See also: Top 10 Apps like World Voicemail Enjoy a 1-week free trial. Cancel anytime. World Voicemail revolutionizes your voicemail experience, making it effortless to retrieve and respond to voicemails. IMPORTANT: To use World Voicemail, yo.. Read more Instantly transform your face into a hilarious work of art. Take funny pictures of yourself and add amazing effects to create outrageous photos. LOL Booth includes tons of unique face mutations and sp.. Read more Crazy Bug Eyes Changer Booth : Funny Eye Makeup Appkruti Solutions LLP See also: Top 10 Apps like Crazy Bug Eyes Changer Bo Go Crazy with Your Eyes ------------------------------- Crazy Bug Eyes Changer Booth is a fun app to change the way your eyes will look in a Video or a Photo. It’s Free, Download Now!!! App uses fa.. Read more Cloud Answering Machine Infinite Loop Development Ltd See also: Top 10 Apps like Cloud Answering Machine Cloud Answering Machine.com allows you to have a second virtual phone number, hosted in the cloud - geographically located anywhere in the world. So, if you are too busy to handle all your phone ca.. Read more Browse Apps | Apps like Showbox | Apps like Dave | Apps like Tinder | Apps like Earnin | Apps like Tumblr | Apps like Wish | Apps like Instagram | Apps like Flipagram | Apps like Snapchat Apps like Letgo | You must have JavaScript enabled in your browser to utilize the functionality of this website. About UsPricing and PlansFAQRequest a quoteContact Us CART 0 10 Funny Voicemail Greetings Recorded by Celebrities BY Natalie Ramirez
Save the funny voicemail greetings for your home phone, and let us handle your business phone. Since our digital call center is open 24/7/365, you will never be greeted by a voicemail greeting requesting you to leave a message. However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so …
42. Hi, you’ve reached [X company]. Our team is currently out of the office or assisting other customers. Leave your name, number, and a brief message so we can direct your call to the proper team member when we return.
5. Check your voicemail inbox. Once you're in your voicemail system, you may have to do things slightly differently than how they're done in this tutorial, depending on your telecom carrier and/or voicemail client.
Of course, you NEED a voicemail greeting for the times your salon is closed at least. Here’s a checklist of best practices.