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Don't you do it! Don't you dare! I don't want to hear it! Don't you beep! If you beep, I'll... don't even think about it!... Don't...!

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So long as phones can ring and eyes can see, leave a message, and I’ll get back to thee.
Website: https://classroom.synonym.com/christian-ideas-for-voice-mail-messages-12082608.html .

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No45: Hello, this is Jim. Unfortunately I can't answer the phone right now because I've just come back from the Mirror Worlds and I'm still made up of antimatter, so if I were to pick up the phone right now, the resulting energy release would make Hiroshima look like a wet firecracker. So leave a message at the tone and I'll get back to you as soon as my component particles have been restored to their normal charges.
2. The Simpsons Share a Funny Answering Greeting. If you’re looking for a short and simple message, we suggest turning to Homer Simpson as he tells callers to… leave a message.

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Tonberries enjoy dark, shadowy places lit only by their lamps or dim natural light, and are most often found living in the depths of empty caves or ancient ruins. Though they seem to be peaceful creatures living in large, friendly societies, the presence of an outsider in their territory can make them very angry. tonberry, May 24, 2003 Joined: Feb 22, 2001 Messages: 3,328 Location: Casa de Non Compos Mentis "You have reached the residence of ..... currently we are out hunting other people to cook and fry for dinner. Please leave your phone number and address and we will get back to you." allhailIndia, May 26, 2003 Joined: Sep 4, 2002 Messages: 53 "Hello?.... Wait, i can't hear you.... just a second.... BEEP bige2002, May 26, 2003 One of Dad's friends had an answering machine that said... Hello? * you start saying message* Oh yeah! I'm not here! Please leave a message. *beep* puglover, May 26, 2003 Joined: Nov 10, 2002 Messages: 1,536 Location: NY, NY
5. Ooma. Ooma voicemail app is among best voicemail app android providing high degree of flexibility. The app offers its users with high-quality voicemail and all-around phone services from anywhere.

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6. Pre-Recorded Message Playback. The Perfect Single Businessperson Solution. One Mailbox That Can Transfer Your Callers To Any Phone Of Yours, As Well As Voicemail And Fax To Email.

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Website: https://grasshopper.com/blog/perfect-voicemail-greetings-10-tips-for-recording-effective-and-professional-messages-plus-examples/

  • seven best business voicemail greetings

    Funny Voicemail Greetings. Are you bored of listening, as well as recording standard voice-mail messages in your answering machine? If so, scroll for some really funny voice-mail greetings, which will surely bring a smile on your, as well as your caller's face.

    Too Bad These 10 Biggest NBA Draft Busts Didn’t Deliver as Expected7 Funniest Misheard Lyrics That You Got Wrong TooYou’ll Definitely Laugh at These 7 Funniest Nigger Jokes7 Funniest Wedding Toasts That Will Make Everyone LaughGet to Know the 6 Biggest Yielding Cannabis StrainsThese 12 Funniest Gamertags Will Make You Laugh Out Loud Recent Posts 7 Funny Things That Only People Who Exercise Would Understand 7 Funniest Wedding Toasts That Will Make Everyone Laugh 7 Funniest Misheard Lyrics That You Got Wrong Too 7 Funniest Riddles That Will Make You Think and Laugh 7 Funniest Graduation Speeches You’ll Never Forget
    Your voicemail greeting is the first introduction to your office — what kind of impression do you want to leave?

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    What is the recorded message that the seller listens/responds to when s/he calls the number on your postcard?

    A is for academics, B is for beer. So leave a message. After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. Finally get an answering machine. Now how does this thing work? Press record button, I did that, and the light should be on. Hmmmm, I wonder what this button does……. This call may be recorded or monitored for quality and training purposes.
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  • professional voicemail greetings examples for a business

    “Hi, this is Ralph. You’re getting this message because I’m probably sleeping. Leave your message at the tone and maybe I’ll call you back when I’m awake. If this is about anything food-related, please press 411 and your call will be rerouted to the dog, who will immediately wake me up to take your call. Do not use 411 because you want to tell me you lost a whisker or your human changed cat litter brands on you. I don’t care. Food only! And anyway, why aren’t YOU sleeping? Weirdo.”

    Here’s another funny one for those times you really want to lighten the business mood:
    Happy [Monday!] You’ve reached [Jessica on the Business Development Team at LinkedPhone]. I’m presently out of the office [for a meeting until late this afternoon]. Please include your name, number and the reason for your call and I’ll get back to you ASAP. Thank you and have a fantastic day!

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    -Hi. I’m probably home. I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like. Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you.

    Funny Answering Machine & Voicemail Messages. Semper Fi. Leave your order after the beep. You know what I hate about voicemail messages? They go on and on and on, wasting your time. No more. I pledge to you, my caller, that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me! I promise.
    It was funny the first time it got you, and then it was not funny the next 8,306 times.

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7. A Classic Hepburn Answering Greeting for Voicemails. Katharine Hepburn’s iconic and feisty voice goes down in history and can add a bit of moxie to your voicemail greeting.

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Hello, this is Rip van Winkle. I'm not awake to take your call right now. Please leave your message at the sound of the snore.

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When creating an individual voicemail greeting, clearly identify yourself, your role, and your company, and let the caller know when you will be able to return their call. Here are a few voicemail greeting scripts you can use with your personal work phone extension: On Another Call Example Script. Hi, this is [YOUR NAME] from [COMPANY NAME].

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