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There’s one old woman with a little black purse tomahawking him. She looks like a…jackhammer. We got another woman that’s hitting him like she’s got a cattle prod. She’s got an umbrella she’s sticking it in his side.

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Today I've decided to end our friendship, but I realized that you know all of my darkest secrets, so we will have to continue this relationship till the end of time. Leave a message at the beep.
My grandpa (RIP)'s outgoing voicemail message used to give their phone # instead of their name. "Hi, you've reached 555-1234, leave your message at the beep." .

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Category: Phone Number, Mobile Phone, Home Phone, Computer, Mail Service Show more
Origins: In one memorable episode of the 1970s television sitcom All in the Family, Archie Bunker is involved in a minor traffic accident and, eager to cash in on the incident, rushes out and engages a Jewish lawyer to sue the other party. However, after conferring with the defendant’s attorney, Archie’s lawyer advises him that he has no case, as the other side’s witnesses are too strong. There’s an old legal precept, he informs Archie: “You can’t beat a station wagon full of nuns.”

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You talk. I'm sorry I didn't answer your call. I want to be the reason you look at your phone and smile. Zedge have thousands of ringtones for your cell phone. He could record the following: Hi! This is John Smith.
Has using headphones made you think about their working? To know how headphones work, read on.

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Our funny voice mail greetings are uploadable to any voicemail system or answering machine you can call into to change your greeting, so you can have a funny voice greeting on your cell phone or home phone! (Click Here to Learn How) All voice greetings are delivered at the time of purchase in a .zip file containing a .wav file, an .mp3 file

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No18: I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember. I'd appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and telling me something about myself. Thanks.

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    Funny; Funny Voicemail Funny Voicemail sorry but nobodys available to answer you call at this time.if you'd like to leave a message please wait for the beep, then press #, then so on..great doe anyone know how to have the phone say the name as it is on the contact list? At 6/4/10, 4:47 AM, *Anonymous* said

    Recognize Their Need. When someone calls your business, the voicemail should give them a sense of validation. This means that your voicemail should extend gratitude for their interest in your business, or an apology for not being there to answer your call. These two simple courtesies can go a long way in the creation or establishment of client/business trust. Make it Informative for the Caller. Your voicemail must include all the information the customer will need for your particular business. For instance, if you’re a brick and mortar establishment, it’s wise to include your store hours. It’s also a good idea to leave them an alternate way to contact you, especially if it’s after hours. After all, you don’t want to miss just one potential customer. Here are some suggestions for elements to include in your voicemail: Business name Hours (if brick and mortar) Alternate method of contact, such as email Your name
    “Good afternoon. You have reached the office of [your name]. I will be out of the office beginning on [date] and will be returning on [date]. Please leave a brief message with your contact information, and I’ll be sure to get back to you as soon as I return on [date]. If this is an emergency or you need to speak with someone before I return, please contact [name of colleague/supervisor], [their job title], at [their phone number].”

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    Nerdy Fact you can call the number on Lucy from Despicable Me2's card get - Prank - Prank meme - #prank #prankmeme - Nerdy Fact you can call the number on Lucy from Despicable Me2's card get a voicemail etc COOL!! The post Nerdy Fact you can call the number on Lucy from Despicable Me2's card get appeared first on Gag Dad.

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  • professional voicemail greetings for your cell phone

    Typical voicemail greetings usually start with a hi, tell you they are not home, to leave a message, and that they’ll call you back. However, there are people who shook it up a little bit and came up with witty and funny voicemail greetings that are not your norm. If you are looking for a creative way on how to add spice to your boring voicemail greetings and make it a hit, these funniest voicemail greetings will not just make you chuckle, but they will give you cool ideas on what to make on yours. Get ready to laugh as we start the countdown. Share on Facebook

    Top 7 business voicemail greetings. 1. Hi, you’ve reached [ you name] of [ your business ]. I’m sorry that I’m not available to answer your call at the present time. Please leave your name, number and a quick message at the tone and I’ll forward your message to the appropriate person. 2.
    I was trying to put together the puzzle of my life and realized there's a piece missing - you. Business transition voicemail greetings communicate important information resulting from changes to your business activities driven by things like a new address or remodeling. Keep it light and simple! In the new HBO documentary Robin Williams: Come Inside My Mind, Billy Crystal, fellow comedian and decades-long friend of Robin Williams, opens up about his bond with the late comedian, including a series of voicemails that I'm leaving you this message because it's the fastest way for my heart to reach yours.

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    4. Funny Voicemail Greetings. Hi, you’ve reached [your name] at [X company]. We are busy trying to save the world by [what your company does best]. If you want to learn more about how we do it, please leave us your name and phone number, and we will get back to you as soon as our mission is complete— which should be fairly soon.

    High Voltage 48V 51.2V Solar System Batteries BMS Lithium ion Battery Storage Solar Power Bank Battery Pack Would you like to change your voicemail greetings?Do you need our help?Build a quirky, fun voicemail and share a moment of laughter with your dear before they understand the intent behind you and run to pick you up!Voice mail is not necessarily monotonous or very jazz or trendy.What you want is a balance between the two.Whenever I call someone and their voicemail greeting is playing, it tells me who they are.
    4. Humorous Voicemail Greetings. While straightforward is always the safe bet, certain entities can go to the humorous side of voicemail greetings. Before taking this route, consider the type of callers and the persona the recipient is trying to convey.

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A good cell phone voice mail greeting is clear, courteous and to the point. Enunciate, don't mumble, to make it as easy as possible for those with poor hearing or bad connections to be able to hear your greeting. Be polite, and save swearing for the conversation, if applicable.

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Cash Me Outside. Donald Trump - Donate to the Wall. Thank You For Holding. Hillary - Delete My Emails. Pokemon Go.

voicemail personal greeting ideas

Many professionals in New York take the subway every day to work. More often than not, you have a quiet train ride with no interruptions. Now, let’s say you sit down and this panhandler begins his hilarious rant.

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A word of warning: These greetings will not do you any favors if you're in the midst of a job hunt or work in a conservative industry. Always remember your target personas. If there's a chance they won't appreciate your sense of humor, opt for a straightforward greeting instead.

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