ProfileFriendsGroupsDiscussionsCommentsReading ChallengeKindle Notes & HighlightsQuotesFavorite genresFriends’ recommendationsAccount settingsHelpSign out Start by marking “No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages” as Want to Read: We’d love your help. Let us know what’s wrong with this preview of No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages by John Carfi. Problem: It’s the wrong book It’s the wrong edition Other Not the book you’re looking for? Preview — No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages by John Carfi liked it 3.00 · Rating details · 3 ratings · 1 review Published March 28th 1984 by CCC Publications (first published March 1984) 0918259002 (ISBN13: 9780918259004) To ask other readers questions about No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages, please sign up. Be the first to ask a question about No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages This book is not yet featured on Listopia. Add this book to your favorite list » Aug 02, 2014 Kelly rated it liked it I like this book. Great, snarky answering machine messages. There's something so special about each class of debut YA authors; after all, young adult fiction is all about the hopefulness of new... Company About us Careers Terms Privacy Interest Based Ads Ad Preferences Help AirPods AirPods Max AirPods Pro Apple Car Apple Deals Apple Glasses Apple Pay Apple Pro Display XDR Apple TV Apple Watch SE Apple Watch Series 7 CarPlay HomePod HomePod mini iMac iOS 14 iOS 15 iPad iPad Air iPad mini iPad Pro iPadOS 14 iPadOS 15 iPhone 11 iPhone 12 iPhone 13 iPhone 13 Pro iPhone 14 iPhone SE 2020 iPod touch Mac mini Mac Pro MacBook Air MacBook Pro 13" MacBook Pro 16" macOS Big Sur macOS Monterey watchOS 7 watchOS 8 Home New Posts Forum List Trending New Threads New Media Spy New posts WikiPost Latest summaries Watched WikiPosts Support FAQ and Rules Contact Us Thread starter patrick0brien Start date Jun 14, 2006 Sort by reaction score
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It can help to rough out a script to start each message that includes your name and the name of the practice, so that it’s clear right away who called. If you need a reply urgently, say that right away, too, since the person may not listen to the whole message.
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“Hey there, this is [name]. You’ve reached [XYZ company]. Unfortunately, I’m currently away from the office and am traveling in [place]. I won’t be back in the office until [date] and I will get in touch with you then.
No20: Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
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In this version, you pretend to realize how dumb it is to leave instructions WHILE you are leaving instructions. Hey everyone, listen to me having an epiphany, and then leave me a message.
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If a telephone rings in an empty room and no one is there to answer it, was there really a phone call? Help me investigate this phenomenon by leaving your name and number after the tone.
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Don't you do it! Don't you dare! I don't want to hear it! Don't you beep! If you beep, I'll... don't even think about it!... Don't...!
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Here are some great examples of professional voicemail greetings that you can use in your business!
Thinking of having some fun with your callers while you are away? Here are some funny answering machine greetings and messages. Take a look.
Listing Results Fun Voicemail Scripts 48 Results Phone number Mobile phone Contact us Customer service
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Happy [Monday!] You’ve reached [Jessica on the Business Development Team at LinkedPhone]. I’m presently out of the office [for a meeting until late this afternoon]. Please include your name, number and the reason for your call and I’ll get back to you ASAP. Thank you and have a fantastic day!
This is a magic voicemail message. Leave a message. Leave a message at the beep. Oh, here it is. Hi, thanks for calling. If you need to reach me right away call my personal line as purposefully leave of one numberthat Hi, I am available to the phone right now but I take the calls in order of importance.
The other day, I was leaving a message, and the voicemail system cut me off. It seems I exceeded my 90 seconds of allotted time. No, I didn’t call back. I figured the man got the gist of the message, so I left the ball in his court.
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Funny; Funny Voicemail Funny Voicemail sorry but nobodys available to answer you call at this time.if you'd like to leave a message please wait for the beep, then press #, then so on..great doe anyone know how to have the phone say the name as it is on the contact list? At 6/4/10, 4:47 AM, *Anonymous* said
I think that's hilarious! Hope that helps! This is not a voicemail; this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you and I'll think about returning your call. I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember.
If it works better for you, offer your callers the option to email you, or even send over a text to a VoIP texting app, or even your personal number if you don’t mind. Many people will prefer the ability to quickly text or email, and callers will appreciate the increased level of service.
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This call is from a woman that is calling to ask us to go investigate a strange situation with her neighbor. Apparently her neighbor has attached a tiller to the family dog and is making the dog drag it around to rake leaves?
3. (858) 651-5050: Beautiful phrases. When looking for random phone numbers to call, it does not get funkier than this one. Dialing this line allows you to listen to what sounds like the most well-thought poem ever written.
Click here to watch the Youtube video of Adele singing an acapella version of “Hello.”
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http://www.ezrasvoice.com/ Cell Phone Voicemail Greetings can easily be created using this blueprint. While all Cell Phone Voicemail Greetings will be uniq
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19. Hi, you’ve reached [employee name]’s voicemail box. [Employee first name] no longer works for [company name]. Please call our main line at [phone number] and we’ll be happy to connect you with a current team member who can help.
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The best text-to-speech voices don't sound robotic at all. Do a "text to speech" search in Google to explore your options. Type in your script and presto! You'll get an instant greeting with a natural sounding voice. You can select from a broad spectrum of male & female voices with any local or foreign accent you choose. LinkedPhone offers text-to-speech built right into our software. It's super popular and our users love it!
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21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages | Laugh Break 2. Hi. I’m probably home, I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like. Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you. And the Number 1 Actual Answering Machine Message Recorded and Verified by The World Famous International Institute of Answering MachineMessages. 1.
– Thanks for calling. This is (name). Today is a Friday and I am working from our corporate office. If you need to reach me immediately, please call (number). Otherwise, please leave me a message and I’ll return your call as soon as possible.
You can send them funny Good Morning messages to make them smilechuckle, or laugh out loud from deep under the covers. Check out these hilarious messages that your loved ones will surely appreciate. Mothers are natural comedians, so you will have to try a little harder to get that desired reaction from them. It would not be difficult when you know what tickles their funny bones.
After hours of brainstorming and countless redos, area man Tom Fulton finally recorded the perfect joke voicemail that no other person will ever bother listening to.
Funny Examples pre recorded answering machine messages free Voicemail Messages These can be used to play tricks on people on April fools day or for any other reason. Use with discretion. If you don't have a time machine, answeriing leave a message and I'll get back with you in the future.
There are some people who tend to judge your work according to your voicemail greeting. In this article, we tell you what are the best ways to draft your voicemail message.
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“Hi there! You’ve reached [XYZ Company]. We are unable to take your call at the moment, but we want to hear what you have to say. Please leave your full name, contact details and reason for reaching out, and one of our staff members will get in touch with you within 24 hours. Thanks!”
I have a confession to make: I haven’t recorded a new voicemail greeting since 2014. In the past four years, I (hopefully) have become more articulate, poised, and self-assured. But hear my voicemail recording, and you’d think I was still new to the work world, a little unsure of myself — and probably not an authority. Obviously I need toupdate it. And if you haven’t changed your voicemail greeting in over a year, you’re likely in the same boat. After all, a professional voicemail recording boosts your credibility, makes you seem more competent, and encourages whoever’s listening to it to continue the relationship. A relatively unprofessional one — like mine, for instance — does the opposite: It encourages prospects, recruiters, and potential connections to run in the other direction. With that in mind, I’ve written 18 unique voicemail greetings for every situation. Pick your favorite, practice a few times, then record your new voicemail.
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These cool voicemail ideas given below will take the mundane effects off and leave you with fresh sounding voicemail messages. So take a look at some funny greetings that you can use as your funny cell phone voicemail ideas or home phone. My ass and I are out for a walk. Leave a message till then. Oh hi, how are you?
And here are some sample voicemail greeting scripts for doctors, lawyers, and dentists, in case you're not looking for business greetings. 1. Personal Business Voicemail Greeting. Your personal voicemail greeting should be brief and to the point. State your name and your availability, project a welcoming aura, and ask the caller for whatever
The number you have xxx-xxxx (your number) has been changed, the new number is xxx-xxxx (again, your number). CULATA!
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1. The Celebrity Greeting. Hello! If you are [insert celebrity crush or famous person], call my personal line. You know what number that is. Wink wink. The President is not in the office.
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Sound upbeat in your message. When recording, be sure to say your message with a smile on your face. It’s obvious when people aren’t happy in their message. Since your work revolves around keeping happy customers, do your part by keeping a happy-sounding voicemail message.
Hello, this is Ron. I'm not home right now, but I can take a message. Hang on a second while I get a pencil. [Open a drawer and shuffle stuff around.] OK, what would you like me to tell me?
My ass and I are out for a walk. So as soon as I can get my ass back in the house, I’ll give you a call. Leave a message till then.
What’s more, according to WP Beginner, “more than 88% of local searches on mobile devices end up in a phone call,” so you don’t want to be caught off guard when a customer calls!
Recent trends in voicemail have leaned towards the desire for many individuals to relate on other forms of digital message than traditional voice mails. More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time. However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller. The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail.
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The rates provided are general rates and provide a guideline as to what your voice over will cost. If you have a budget for your project that doesn’t seem to line up with the rates posted, please don’t just move on to another talent or venue for your voice over work.
4.) Keep your voicemail message to two points. If you need to share more information, then say in your voicemail that you’re going to send the person an e-mail message with the rest of the details. “… I’m calling to share that we have finalized the … and lastly, that we know you’d like to meet at 9:00 AM as we discussed. However, is Tuesday or Wednesday better for your team’s schedule? ….”
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We’re keeping it simple with this one. Just a few basic elements to help you get started. As long as you know who your audience is, the message you wish to convey, and the information you need from the caller, the rest should fall into place quite nicely. Let’s face it, a voicemail greeting for a lumber company will probably be different than that of a psychologist’s office. One greeting is aimed at securing potential customers, and the other is geared towards appointments, more or less. Once you are certain who your caller is, the better your voicemail. Center on your audience, first and foremost. Knowing what to relate ensures that your caller will leave the right message. For instance, if you’re a retail store, you would include your hours of operations, and perhaps any specials that you’re running. If you are a therapist’s office, then you’d need to include an alternate number in case a patient is having an issue and requires immediate help. Again, this will vary depending on the business. Here, a therapist would definitely request the caller leave their contact information. However, a retail store chain might not request that. There are also complex voicemail systems such as those used by mobile phone services, which ask you to press a certain number on your phone, where you are asked to leave your account information. Again, as you can see, it all boils down to the demographics of your callers, and what you need from them to conduct the best business possible. Depending on the situation, your caller might be in a good mood or not. In either case, they’ll probably be eagerly awaiting your call. So, it stands to reason that you only promise them a call back if you can deliver. In other words, if you’re a small shop and you’ve decided to close due to a much-needed sabbatical, then don’t leave a voicemail greeting where you promise them to call right back. However, if you have an active customer service staff, then you can promise to return their call within the same day.
Businesses should have two main types of greetings to create an excellent call experience. The first one is what we call a “welcome greeting” – this greeting welcomes callers to your business. Typically, a welcome greeting will present a menu of call options like hours, location, or customer service. For more details on how to create a welcome greeting for your general business number, read this article.
More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time. However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller. The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail. A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century.
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Customer Service and Operations at OpenPhone. Founder of SOUL House artist showcase in the GTA. Art is life! Dee Lee 1 year ago Reply
9. Queue Callback Message. What the caller hears when they request a callback from the queue. Sample Scripts: “You have requested to have the next available agent call you back from the queue.
Hello, this is Susan. I don't live here, so if you were trying to call me, you've dialed the wrong number. On the other hand, if you were trying to call John, Jim, or Eric, please leave your name and number at the tone. I don't guarantee that one of them will call you back -- only that I won't.
37. Hi, this is [company name]. Sorry we missed your call. Leave a message and we’ll get back to you shortly.
Laugh as you watch how Mr. Neeson’s fan got him to record a custom voicemail greeting here.
Friends and colleagues speak to each using first names only. So do people of authority. They do not call each other and leave voicemail messages asking for Mister, Miss, or Mrs. Therefore, when you call a person you want to do business with and you leave a voicemail message, refer to them by their first name only. Don't say mister, miss, or misses. Don't say their last name. Begin your voicemail message by saying only "hi/hello" followed by the person's first name. Or, you can even forget the "hi/hello" and just say the person's first name. That is how you show confidence and authority and separate yourself from weak salespeople.
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This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed. We guarantee that Ninja Number will help grow your business. January 19, Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers: No one answers phone calls anymore; send me a text.
I quite liked the ease of the script; not rushed and overbearing. It is like you are right there talking to me at the kitchen table. Slight grammatical error, it’s ” my wife and I” not “me and my wife.”
-Now I lay me down to sleep; Leave a message at the beep. If I should die before I wake, remember to erase the tape.
I can’t come to the phone right now because I’m down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of 20 dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handi- work, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone. If you’re from the Department of the Treasury, please ignore this message.
What you do not want to do is say your phone number so quickly that the person has to listen to your voicemail multiple times to try and figure out your phone number. We have all gotten those annoying voicemail messages where the person said their phone number so quickly that we had to listen to their message several times to figure out their phone number. Don't be that jerk who leaves their phone number so fast that the other person has to listen to your message over and over to try and figure out what your phone number is.
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