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Hi, I am a machine. Why do you hate talking to me? I never hurt anyone. Can we talk after the beep?

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HI, you’ve reached (name). I’m so sorry I can’t pick up the call right now because I am standing right behind you. GOTCHA.
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Different businesses may require different types of greetings. This is the ultimate list that can work for a wide array of company messages.
7. "Hello, this is [your name] at [company]. Thanks for calling. Please leave your name, number, and the reason you'd like to chat, and I'll get back to you ASAP."

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Hi, you have reached (phone number) you have a chance to win one million dollars if you can answer the following 1. What is your name? 2. What is your phone number? 3. Why did you call this number?
More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time. However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller. The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail. A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century.

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Katharine Hepburn’s iconic and feisty voice goes down in history and can add a bit of moxie to your voicemail greeting. Click here to hear how Hepburn brings these words to life.

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6. Full Waiting Queue Message. What the caller hears when the waiting queue is full. Sample Scripts: “We are currently experiencing high call volume. Please leave a message with your name and phone number and we will return your call as soon as possible.”

  • scripts for business voicemail greetings

    We hope you enjoyed these funny voicemail greetings! Since our business answering service is open 24 hours a day, you’ll never be greeted by a voicemail greeting requesting you to leave a message. However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so we hope these funny …

    Here is a list of some funny messages and greetings for answering machines. Hello. Say something quickly, I don’t have time! Hi, I am a machine. If you hate talking to me, why have you called? I am, you-know-who. Leave your, you-know-what and you-know-when. Bye bye. I am not at home but my answering machine is. You can talk to my machine for some time. I have no issues.
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    In this post, I’ll share what makes a good voicemail greeting — and the best voicemail greeting scripts you can use.

    Hi there! You’ve reached the sewer on the next street. I can’t get to the phone right now, but if you take a wee walk, I’ll be at the sewer grate with the red balloon…floating. Please feel free to join me.
    You may think your voicemail message is professional. But when you listen back it could sound rushed or shaky. Listen to it regularly to see if changes are needed.

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    Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us.

    Our friend Jim then proceeds to describe what happens as the man gets out of his truck to go chastise the women he’d just driven into. He reaches the driver’s window when events take a sudden and violent turn:
    Hello, you have reached the automated answering service for (your name), your message will be answered to in the order in which it was received, your message is number 8,243, please hold, your message is important to me.

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    -This is you-know who. We are you-know-where. Leave your you-know-what you-know-when.

    Website: https://www.austincc.edu/offices/telecommunications-services/tutorials-and-reference-guides/sample-voicemail-greetings
    No15: Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll be right with you.

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Funny voicemail messages are an excellent alternative for people that are looking for that unique touch for something that seems really mundane. If you’re having trouble coming up with your own then you can check out some of the funny voicemail messages below.

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Straight To Voicemail App Lets You Go Straight To Someone S Voicemail Without Ringing Their Phone Great Way To Call In Sick An App Voicemail Talking To You

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Our Favorite Funny Voicemail Greetings . 1. Elvis Presley Rocks Your Voicemail. Elvis appeared in 31 films, performed in 1,156 U.S. concerts and has sold more than a billion albums since the 1950’s. Why not bring his iconic voice to your personal voicemail to entertain your callers? Elvis Presley Voicemail Recording. To the tune of "Jailhouse

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Answering message 259. Search for jokes by keyword. Also see. Aha! Jokes > Random Answering Machine Messages. Instead of text-based answering machine messages, use audio messages! Visit the funny audio division for almost one hundred different audio answering machine messages.

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