Hi, I am not here right now, but if you are a friend, leave a message, if you are a creditor you can kiss my... (beep)
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Here is a list of some funny messages and greetings for answering machines. Hello. Say something quickly, I don’t have time! Hi, I am a machine. If you hate talking to me, why have you called? I am, you-know-who. Leave your, you-know-what and you-know-when. Bye bye. I am not at home but my answering machine is. You can talk to my machine for some time. I have no issues.
No47: This is you-know who. We are you-know-where. Leave your you-know-what you-know-when.
Other jokes and witty lines can be recorded for your callers that may bewilder a silence after the tone, or you might get to hear laughs that started before the beep, or you might throw someone off into the old routine of “What?…Hello?…Are you–Is this?…Am I leaving a message?” But you want fresh ideas. You can borrow mine to entertain your callers. Let me know their reactions. This one sounds like you are a corporation that has several operators who are busy with a large volume of calls. Includes elevator muzak and sound effects. Welcome. Due to a large volume of calls, all of our operators are busy. Please hold for the next available operator. (Music) Our operators are still busy. Please stay on the line while your call is being transferred to the Voice recording database. (connection) Infomercial that sells your messages in a rushed and enthusiastic manner. Borrowed the “complicated payment” from Mitch Hedburg.
Yes, you can be charged. This depends on the service. For example, Spectrum’s Voice Residential Services Price Guide charges $3.95 for voicemail.
I love it! Every time I hear something like this and realize that there really are terrible sales people out there – doing stuff like this – it gives me huge encouragement. I’m sure I make mistakes, who doesn’t, but wow!!!
Funny answering machine or voicemail messages to try. Posted by hotcrowd on August 6, 2009. Try a clever message for your phone. These are a hoot! Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn’t lend me enough money.
Creating a professional voicemail greeting isn’t complicated, but you need to keep a few things in mind to ensure success. The following tips will help: Be friendly and welcoming - let your company's personality shine!; Have a clear voice, speak at a slow to moderate pace, minimize background noise; Ensure the greeting is human and approachable; Keep the greeting short and informative; Ensure the greeting doesn’t sound robotic or unnatural; Show your gratitude for the call by saying thank you; Manage expectations by clearly stating when the client can expect a callback.
Random facts could include their favorite movie, vacation spot, candy, or television show. Regardless of what you choose, it will surprise your caller and more than likely make them leave a message if they were considering hanging up.
From farts to turds and from banter to hits below the belt — BFFs, besties, best friends and bae are on the chopping block here. You talk. I'm sorry I didn't answer your call. I want to be the reason you look at your phone and smile. Zedge have thousands of ringtones for your cell phone. He could record the following: Hi! This is John Smith. Some of these quotes are designed to accommodate every feeling an individual has. Give him a reason to smile and think about you with a fun message he won't forget.
Dave is out. Jane is out. Rover is out. This is their answering machine. I am in. The beep is in. At the sound of the beep leave your name. At the sound of the beep leave your message.
Two other parodies of telephone messages have been made from the telephone company by Ghtrout.
Listing Results Funny Voicemail Greeting Mp3 46 Results Phone number Mobile phone Contact us Customer service
Again, “sell to me”, “feel comfortable”. I want their subconscious to hear me say, speaking of which, I found a lot of sellers who reached out to us are just wondering when we're going to try and pull the wool over their eyes or whether the up to something scammy, so I like to just drop in indications that we understand that they're a little nervous about this and the whole transaction is going to be handled by a licensed attorney and a local title company, no kitchen table closings, so everything is being done above board.
– Thank you for calling (name of the company). If you know the extension number of the person you are trying to reach, you may dial it now. Press 1 for sales. Press 2 for customer service. Press 3 for the billing department. Press 8 to access our fax on-demand system. Press 9 for a company directory, or press 0 for the operator.
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