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A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future…. .

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I have no idea if I’ve dialed the right number or if I’m about to leave a message for Kim Jong-il (why wouldn’t Kim Jong-il have a cellphone with a Lancaster County, PA area code?). If I’m killed tonight by snipers from North Korea, this is all your fault.
Woman Breaks Down How To Shut Down Men Asking For Your Number With Fake Voicemail - FAIL Blog - Funny Fails

examples of funny voicemail greetings

Hello. This is Mark and Nathan's phone. We're not here right now, but the phone is.
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good professional voicemail greetings

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I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your message, name and number, I'll call you back when I am.

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    Here are a few sample voice mail greetings to get you started: Standard Voice Mail Greetings. Normal Greeting (Without pager notification) "This is (name) of (company). I'm currently unable to take your call. Please leave your name, phone number, and a brief message, and I …
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    The female voicemail greeting experts know how to pace their delivery and produce the perfect sound for your application.
    2. What to Say in a Voicemail Message. When unable to answer the phone, a voicemail message can be important. Below are examples of what to say in a voicemail message.

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    If I’m your best friend, that’s not a problem. But otherwise, I have no idea if I’m leaving a message for the right person or not. Was that his voice? I couldn’t tell. It kinda sounded like Micheal Cera. Did I accidentally just call Michael Cera’s phone? “Hey if this is Alex, it’s Bryan Allain…call me back. And if this is Michael Cera, loved you in Year One. You may also call me back.”

    So, I added a, you, uh, your, uh, just a pause or maybe a little chuckle in here or there just to make it sound organic. So right off the top, if we've already spoken about your house and you just need to leave a message, press pound now and leave a message after the tone. So that obviously has a practical use because if sellers call back because that's the only number that they have, maybe the second or third time, I don't want to have to make them endure the entire message before they leave us a message. And that is actually how Vumber works.
    So take a look at some funny greetings that you can use as your funny cell phone voicemail ideas or home phone. My ass and I are out for a walk.

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    “Can you hear me? Can you hear me? I don’t think if this thing works. I’m probably guarding my litter box right now so the dog doesn’t steal my deposits. This is important work, so I can’t distract myself with phone calls. I’ll catch up with you later. Is this even working? Leave a message and hopefully I’ll figure out how to retrieve it.”

    Every professional knows how important having a LinkedIn profile is to network with people in the...
    “Good morning. You’ve reached the voicemail of [your name]. Today is [date]. Please leave me a message with your name and contact information. Oh, and here’s my motivational quote of the day: [read quote].”

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scripts for professional voicemail greetings

5. "Hello, [Person's name] is chasing new adventures and is no longer with [Company name]. Please forward all future requests to [New or interim person's name] at [phone number]. Thank you!"

best voicemail messages for sales

The one drawback to Fiverr is you won’t be working directly with the artist in a studio and providing immediate feedback. Because of this, you could end up with a project that’s not 100% what you had in mind.

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Read the SMS.Need some ideas for funny voicemail greetings? Our users have volunteered their best greetings that…. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam.

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Hello, this is Susan. I don't live here, so if you were trying to call me, you've dialed the wrong number. On the other hand, if you were trying to call John, Jim, or Eric, please leave your name and number at the tone. I don't guarantee that one of them will call you back -- only that I won't.

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