funny greetings for your voicemail
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“In case you have forgotten, this is a machine – my owner does not want siding, the newspaper, or the carpets cleaned. He donates to charity through its office and do not want their picture taken. If you’re still with me, leave a message and we’ll see if he calls you back.”

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Hi, this is John's answering machine. He's not here, but I'm open to suggestions.
After hours of brainstorming and countless redos, area man Tom Fulton finally recorded the perfect joke voicemail that no other person will ever bother listening to. .

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Of course, your phone rang because someone wanted to get in touch. They got your voicemail because you were busy or just not there. If you section off a block of your day to check voicemails, let the caller know so they can expect a time for you to return their call. People will leave more details if they know someone will check it later.
Hello, we are unable to come to the phone right now. Please leave your name and number unless of course you are a salesman or trying to solicit money.

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Hello. Thank you for contacting [Business Name]. Unfortunately, we are not currently available at the moment. Our regular office hours are Monday through Friday, 8 am to 4 pm, closed during the weekend. Please leave a message along with your name and number, and we’ll get back to you as soon as possible.
5. Hi, this is [your name]. I can’t get to the phone right now, but please leave a message with your name and number, and I’ll get back to you as soon as possible.

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“You’ve reached Bernice’s phone. I’m getting a tooth pulled on Tuesday and don’t feel like talking. In fact, I’ll probably sleep for about four days after the procedure. Tooth resorption is not a joke, friends. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Let your human brush your damn teeth, even if it feels like you’re about to DIE by way of tiny toothbrush. Also, I’ll be accepting gifts of gravy in the days following the extraction.”

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This call is from a woman that is calling to ask us to go investigate a strange situation with her neighbor. Apparently her neighbor has attached a tiller to the family dog and is making the dog drag it around to rake leaves?

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    This short, quick message tells him how you feel, shows he's on your mind, and makes him start thinking about you. All Rights Reserved.However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so we hope these funny voicemail greetings bring you a smile. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Just kidding, buddy.

    The one drawback to Fiverr is you won’t be working directly with the artist in a studio and providing immediate feedback. Because of this, you could end up with a project that’s not 100% what you had in mind.
    This is a great message. It tells me everything that could go wrong with voice messages. Where’s the name? Company? Reason for calling? Solution? Reason to call back? Couldn’t you at least get the name of the person at the front desk? This message is an automatic delete!

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    No22: Bob here. I'm home right now, I'm just screening my calls. So start talking and if you're someone I want to speak with I'll pick up the phone. Otherwise, well, what can I say?

    1. If the reason I was calling you was to ask you what kind of music you like, this little interlude would be perfect. But let me assure you, the reason I was calling was NOT to ask you what kind of music you like.
    CF Staff, Angels and Ambassadors; ask that you join us in praying for the world in this difficult time, asking our Holy Father to stop the spread of the virus, and for healing of all affected.

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    Hello… my name is (your name)’s refrigerator. He/she isn’t home right now to take your call. To leave him/her a message, speak very slowly so I can stick the message with the help of these refrigerator magnets.

    To get a better experience, go to one of these sites and get the latest version of your preferred browser: Setup Professional Voicemail Greetings on iPhone With Examples: Personal, Business and Busy
    #2 “Hey this is Bryan, leave me a message at the beep. Like you needed me to tell you that, right? I mean, how many times have you done this? You already know what to do.”

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    Little things like a great voicemail can really set you apart from your competition. Think about it. Would you be more inclined to want to interview someone who is shouting about how much they hate calling people back, or the person who simply asks you to leave a message? Andrea (she/her) is our head of PR at Snagajob, where she’s focused on telling the world how we help hourly workers and employers. Her first hourly job was as a lifeguard.

    If you are dying… well that is not our problem and we cannot do anything about it. If you want to sell us something… this number is no longer valid. Thank you for calling Starstripe Mental Hospital, and have a nice day. You have reached the voice mail box of your name. I want to hear what you have to say.
    Hi, I am not here right now, but if you are a friend, leave a message, if you are a creditor you can kiss my... (beep)

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“Hey there! This is [name] at [XYZ company]. Thank you for calling. I can’t take your call right now but if you leave your name, contact info and reason for calling, I’ll call you back right away. Take care and speak with you soon!”

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21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages Laugh Brea . Listen to your voice messages and return any calls at your convenience. Set up your voicemail, and get started with Skype voice messages today. Get Skype . Discover all Skype's features .

pre recorded business voicemail greetings

Hello! This is 1-800-PRESLEY. Yes! 1-800-PRESLEY! They say the King died 10 years ago, but we know he's still out there somewhere. So... Leave your name and number and tell us where YOU saw Elvis!

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10. Nobody Misses The Clever Answering Machine Message. Connect Your Team All Under One Number, No Matter If They Are Working Down The Hall Or Across The Country.

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