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2. The Simpsons Share a Funny Answering Greeting. If you’re looking for a short and simple message, we suggest turning to Homer Simpson as he tells callers to… leave a message.

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Rehearse or write down your message before recording it. Remember that old saying “practice makes perfect?” It’s certainly true when it comes to creating an electronic greeting. The more you’ve rehearsed, the easier the message will be to restate. If you don’t have time to practice, writing down the greeting before recording it – and then reading it aloud from the paper – may help you stay focused on the correct wording.
9. This is Dan Cassidy’s answering machine. Please leave your name and number, and after I’ve doctored the tape, your message will implicate you in a federal crime and be brought to the attention of the FBI. .

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10. Hi, you’ve reached (name)’s answering machine. He/she is not in right now, but I’m totally open for suggestions.
No2: Hello, this is Ron's toaster. Ron's new answering machine is in the shop for repairs, so please leave your message when the toast is done... (Cachunk!)

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5. Hi, this is [your name]. I can’t get to the phone right now, but please leave a message with your name and number, and I’ll get back to you as soon as possible.
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Our previous post on funny voicemail greetings got so much attention, we thought we'd continue…. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed. We guarantee that Ninja Number will help grow your business. January 19, Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers: No one answers phone calls anymore; send me a text. Who is this?!

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You’ve worked hard on your application. You’ve double- and triple-checked for spelling errors and you know you are a perfect fit for this job. You’ve followed up on your application and made such a great impression that the employer decides they want to call you in for an interview. You are checking your phone, anxiously awaiting the call…but nothing seems to happen.

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    Information: Your business voicemail should provide all the information the caller needs. ...Validation: A great professional voicemail greeting should thank the caller for their call and apologize for missing it. ...Motivation: The aim of a professional voicemail is to keep the caller on the line long enough to listen to your message. ...

    Avoid background noise. Whether you have music playing in your office, or you’re sitting in a coffee shop, background noise can make it difficult for your customers to understand your greeting. Limit the noise around you when you leave your voicemail greeting.
    Stephen Colbert asked Samuel L. Jackson to record his infamous voice on his outgoing message recording. Click here and listen on Youtube to what it would sound like if Mr. Jackson leant his voice to your voicemail recording.

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    How to record or change your Android voicemail greeting in 10 simple steps. 1. Turn on your phone and launch the Phone app. Turn the power on for your phone. Then, tap the Phone app. 2. Open the dial pad. Tap the dial pad icon near the bottom of the screen to bring up your phone's dial pad. 3.

    No42: A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future.
    Hello. I'm home right now but cannot find the phone. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it.

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    Wondering what to say in your business voicemail greetings? Read on to learn how to record a good voicemail that is professional (or funny) to encourage callers to leave a message.

    2. "Hi, you've reached [name] at [company]. If you need a quick response, please shoot me an email at [insert email address] and I'll be in touch by EOD tomorrow.
    “Hello, you’ve reached the special agent Bond. James Bond. Okay okay, it’s actually [last name]. I’m currently away saving the world on a top-secret mission but I will get back to you as soon as possible. Please leave your name, contact info, number, and availability and I’ll call back as soon as I’m done helping M16. Have a great day. [last name] out!”

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    Here's 10 humorous 'School Answering Machine' messages (author unknown) that we've turned into a high quality poster that you can download and print out. You are welcome to put it up on your Teacher's Room wall for everyone to see. 'LIKE' it on Facebook, tweet about it, email it to your fellow teachers - share the joy!

    Random facts could include their favorite movie, vacation spot, candy, or television show. Regardless of what you choose, it will surprise your caller and more than likely make them leave a message if they were considering hanging up.
    It is true, the people we want the most, we have to live without. Saying goodbye to you is such a crazy thing! Promise me this is not the end of everything. Thank you!

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Hello, this is (name). I am sorry I can’t come to the phone right now. Leave your name, number, and a short message after the beep. Oh and please do wait by the phone till I call you back. Bye.

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How did you get this number?! If you are a friend, trying to give us money or just want to talk, then leave a message or try my cell phone number. But you can tell me all of that in the message you leave me. So, haha funny story, my phone and I are playing hide and seek….

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"Hi. You've reached my voicemail. Please leave your name, number, and a damn good reason why this conversation couldn't be done over text."

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No7: You have reached 934-2435. We picked this machine up at a garage sale in "as-is" condition. You can try to leave a message on it, but we are not sure it will be recorded. If we don't return your call, it means the machine did not work.

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