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2. "Hi, you've reached [name] at [company]. If you need a quick response, please shoot me an email at [insert email address] and I'll be in touch by EOD tomorrow. If it's not urgent, leave me a message with your name and number. Have a great day."

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If you need to reach a patient, please press 1 and then say their name. If you are delusional, please have either you or your monkey press 2and we will connect you to Mothership.
Mick’s storyful messages are keeping customers happy even though their calls were not answered. So happy in fact, that those that hear the voicemail are sharing them with others and laughing along with the owner when he calls them back. .

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A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future…. A is for academics, B is for beer. So leave a message. After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. Finally get an answering machine. Now how does this thing work? Press record button, I did that, and the light should be on. Hmmmm, I wonder what this button does…….
I've assembled this list in mid-nineties from the messages that people were emailing around. As far as I know, the author of this list is unknown.

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Dear Fear It S Time We Go Our Separate Ways Moving Forward I Will Block All Contact With You Next Time You Call My New Secret Separate Ways Dear You Call

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-So long as phones can ring and eyes can see, leave a message, and I’ll get back to thee.-Now I lay me down to sleep; Leave a message at the beep. If I should die before I wake, remember to erase the tape.-Roses are red booger’s are green please leave your message on this …

  • free professional voicemail greetings

    OK, so I follow all the instructions that come with the machine.I pressed all the necessary buttons.So...now what?I...am...so...confused.Trouble you....Hi, you have arrived at the answering machine (name.He/she is not at the moment, but I am totally open to suggestions.

    Wondering what to say in your business voicemail greetings? Read on to learn how to record a good voicemail that is professional (or funny) to encourage callers to leave a message.
    I am not home to talk to you, But please don't be a creep. Just leave your name and number, At the sound of the...

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    Use These Funny Messages To Customise Your Mobile Phone Voicemail. Or Use Them On Your Answer Machine At Home. Save one of these FREE mp3 files to your computer, play it through your computer speakers and record it through your mobile to your customisable voicemail service. Consult your network manual for detailed information on changing your

    Thanks for sharing, It describes about Numerical limit not apply during Quarter which means spillover should occur quarterly. I don't think they follow that today.
    1. The Welcome Greeting. This is the first greeting callers hear when they call your company. Sample Scripts: “Thank you for calling [company name].” “Thank you for calling [company name].

  • professional personal voicemail greeting examples

    You are here: Home / Daily Life & Must-Knows / Calling, Texting, & More / How to Leave a Voice Mail Message Everyone Enjoys Hearing

    Are you bored of listening, as well as recording standard voice-mail messages in your answering machine? If so, scroll for some really funny voice-mail greetings, which will surely bring a smile on your, as well as your caller's face.
    To increase the chances veterinary clients will take your calls or listen to any voice mail messages you do leave, consider these strategies:

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    If you are dying… well that is not our problem and we cannot do anything about it. If you want to sell us something… this number is no longer valid. Thank you for calling Starstripe Mental Hospital, and have a nice day. You have reached the voice mail box of your name. I want to hear what you have to say.

    It’s frustrating enough to reach a voicemail… being helpful and friendly will go a long way and reduce annoyance!
    Category: Cell Phone, Phone Number, Mobile Phone, Contact Support, Business Show more

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Using poems, rhymes, or creating rap songs is another way to leave funny voicemail messages. Twisting any popular poem or rapping an altered nursery rhyme can be a fun way to stamp your personality on a voicemail, for example, "Now I lay me down to sleep — please leave your SOS at the beep" or "Roses are red, violets are blue, if you leave a message, I'll ..." Is Amazon actually giving you the best price? This little known plugin reveals the answer.

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As the drugs take hold, you feel you are losing your grip on reality. You begin to hallucinate. You see a telephone... The telephone is next to an answering machine... You hear a faint click and a light flashes on the answering machine... You hear a beep...

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