A phone call to your business is often the first encounter your customers and prospects have with your company. If no one is available to take the call, having the best professional voicemail greetings possible is important to leave a great first impression and to ensure that business opportunities don’t slip by.
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Not sure if this is real or not (and either is snopes, see below). But, it sure is funny. Happy Monday! EDIT: Try this link. This is where I got it from, I didn't try the one below and it apparently doesn't work: Claim: Voicemail message describes a confrontation between a male motorist and four women after a minor traffic accident.

Don't mess with Bible-totin' old ladies.. Read this little explanation and then listen to the voicemail. You just have to laugh with the guy. On a recent Spurs trip, we were asking one of our sponsors who works at Jack in the Box for some funny stories or experiences with the company. The funniest story he had was when an operations manager was late for a meeting and called his boss to tell him he was running late. As he was leaving the voice mail message, he witnessed an accident and went on to provide "play by play" of the incident. After telling us the story, he promised to send us a copy of the voice mail and here it is. This is the actual voice mail message. It was passed along and forwarded so many times within Jack in the Box; it crashed their voice mail server. Origins: In one memorable episode of the 1970s television sitcom All in the Family, Archie Bunker is involved in a minor traffic accident and, eager to cash in on the incident, rushes out and engages a Jewish lawyer to sue the other party. However, after conferring with the defendant's attorney, Archie's lawyer advises him that he has http://www.snopes.com/autos/graphics/fight.gif no case, as the other side's witnesses are too strong. There's an old legal precept, he informs Archie: "You can't beat a station wagon full of nuns." Perhaps Archie Bunker couldn't beat a station wagon full of nuns, but according to a circulating audio clip, an Impala full of Bible-toting middle-aged women could beat (literally!) the motorist who ran into them. We present the recording for your listening enjoyment through [url="http://www.snopes.com/autos/audio/jackbox.mp3"]this (http://home.swbell.net/kf5tv/voicemail.mp3) link. The file size of the clip is over 4MB, so please be patient while it downloads. As to the questions of whether the account given above is an accurate explanation of the origins of this audio clip, and whether the traffic incident described actually took place, we have to leave them as "Undetermined" for now. A inquiry posed to the corporate offices of Jack in the Box restaurants produced the following response: Thank you for your inquiry. The message that has been in circulation is an actual voice mail message. The incident occurred 5-6 years ago in Texas. I'm not sure how the recording got outside the company or if the employee still works for Jack in the Box, but the recording periodically re-surfaces on the radio and the internet. Even if this explanation is accurate (i.e., the clip originated as a message left on a Jack in the Box employee's voicemail), it doesn't preclude the possibility that the accident described never took place, and the recording was just a prank one employee pulled on a co-worker. Hello, and welcome to Answering Machines of the Rich and Famous! Sam can't come to the phone right now because he's spending the week in his beautiful summer home on the French Riviera. what to say for your personal voicemail greeting No35: (Drunken voice:) You have reached Bob's hotline. We are not able to respond due to uninevitable circumcisions. But if you leave your name and noomber, we won't be in wonder... pa-a-a-a! Website: https://www.mightycall.com/blog/the-best-services-to-record-a-voicemail-greeting-for-business/ Parodying any government or secret service agency is also a great way to create funny voicemail messages. For instance, you could say, "Thank you for calling the Slovakian Consulate. All our diplomats are out changing lightbulbs, so at the sound of the tone, please leave your details and any international secret you may have for sale." Creating funny voicemail messages that sound like they are from the mafia, the FBI, the CIA, or even the IRS can be a cool way to greet your callers when you are not available. Be Part Of Our Story! best voicemail messages funny The other day, I was leaving a message, and the voicemail system cut me off. It seems I exceeded my 90 seconds of allotted time. No, I didn’t call back. I figured the man got the gist of the message, so I left the ball in his court. professional personal voicemail greeting 26. Hello, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m either on another call, on a top secret mission to Mars, or I’ve just stepped away from my desk for the day. Leave a message after the tone and I’ll call you back tomorrow or in about seven months. funny voicemail examples Website: https://www.mightycall.com/blog/the-best-services-to-record-a-voicemail-greeting-for-business/ Contact Us She’s rolling down the window; oh man I think she sprayed him with pepper spray. His hands are on his face and he’s on his knees. She’s getting out and beating him with an umbrella. Send Message Create an account. I agree to the license terms. Sign Up You already have an account? Login here. what is the proper greeting for ramadan You should script out your greetings, rehearse, and find a tone of voice that is reflective of your professionalism and your company’s personality. If applicable, your tone and your message should take into account that certain industries and companies are more conservative than others. How do you leave a message on this thing? I can't understand the instructions. Hello. Testing 1 2 3. I wonder what happens if I touch this. Company-level calls are usually directed to your general business number. There are occasions when everyone in the office is tied up and unable to pick up calls. It’s important to gather information about the reason for the call so that the right person or team can call them back. These greetings ensure that customers do not feel neglected while also providing assurance that their call will be attended to as soon as possible. 2. The Mystery. A mysterious voicemail leaves the listener wondering what the call is about and plays to our fear of loss and FOMO. What if something’s wrong w/ my account? User Alert System provided by Advanced User Tagging (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2021 DragonByte Technologies Ltd. knocking at a wooden roomdoor in different ways. short and aggressive styles. throbing at the door and hectic knocking and ... knock door room throb zombie wooden locked aggressive Dog eating Neck of Goose / Chewing / Breaking Bones - mp3 version Dog eating Neck of Goose / Chewing / Breaking Bones - ogg version Dog eating Neck of Goose / Chewing / Breaking Bones - waveform Dog eating Neck of Goose / Chewing / Breaking Bones - spectrogram 194212.0 ! best voicemail scripts for sales personal voicemail greeting samples funny voicemail greetings app Close Project how to leave a formal voice message 13. "Hello, you've reached [company]. If you're looking for information on [X], please check out our [Facebook page, company website, etc.] If you want to know more about [Y], take a look at [Z page on our site, our YouTube channel, etc.] Still have more questions, or just want to chat with our team? Leave your name and number, and we'll return your call straight away." A relatively unprofessional one — like mine, for instance — does the opposite: It encourages prospects, recruiters, and potential connections to run in the other direction. Hi, you’ve reached Customer Service. We are busy assisting other customers at the is time. Please leave a detailed message with your order number or customer ID, the reason for your call, and the best number to reach you. A Service Specialist will return your call as soon as possible. If you need to reach a patient, please press 1 and then say their name. If you are delusional, please have either you or your monkey press 2and we will connect you to Mothership. If you are dying… well that is not our problem and we cannot do anything about it. Most business organizations will always have a receptionist who will be responsible for receiving and transferring calls but in case you are using voicemail, then you need to know which are the ways in which you can phrase your greeting. Given below are two examples of greetings that you can use for your voicemail, one for during office hours and the other for after office hours. Thank you for calling (name of company). If you know the extension number of the person you are trying to reach, you may dial it now. Press 1 for (department). Press 2 for (department). Press 3 for the (department). Press 4 for the company directory, or press 0 for the operator. Thank you for calling (name of company). We are currently not here to take your call. Our business hours are (working hours and days). If you know the extension number of the person you are trying to leave a message for, you may dial the number now. Press 1 for (department). Press 2 for (department). Press 3 for (department). Press 9 for a company directory. If this is an emergency, please enter (after hours support number) to be connected with the after-hours support personnel. “Hey there, this is [name]. You’ve reached [XYZ company]. Unfortunately, I’m currently away from the office and am traveling in [place]. I won’t be back in the office until [date] and I will get in touch with you then. how to call a number and get voicemail funny voicemail greetings to say what should i say in my personal voicemail greeting Close Project professional voicemail greetings for your cell phone Hi, you have reached the Borg collective. Please leave your name and star system and we'll assimilate you as soon as we can. best voicemail apps “I’m not able to get to the phone in spite of the fact that I’m able to climb mountains, water ski, and play a saxophone. So, please leave me your message, and I’ll get to you soon. Thanks for calling.” ‘The Lord of the Rings: Rise to War’ Lands on iOS and Android Today, Bringing Middle-Earth to Mobile in a Geo-Strategic War Game When you’re closed for the holiday, it’s good to forgo your usual out-of-office greeting for a custom holiday message. Keep it cheery and brief, and be sure to let callers know when you’ll resume normal business operations. An easy way to get started using video content as part of your marketing strategy is to turn... Do You Still Need a Professional Cell Phone Voicemail Greeting? July 25, 2013 Juli Durante resources, tips, greetings – Driving to the day care center to pick up Tracy. Leave a message if it is urgent or I shall return your call in a little while. funny greetings happy birthday professional voicemail greetings free funny voicemail after vaccine Close Project best voicemail app for android 2021 Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money. If your phone has a Lady Gaga ring-back tone, then I can’t guarantee I’ll wait for you to answer. 5. …I would thank you for calling, but I haven’t heard what you have to say yet. Just kidding! I’ll return your call as soon as possible. Thanks! 6. …If you’re Jennifer Lawrence, call my emergency line. (Insert your celebrity crush Appfelstrudel - iPhone & iPad App Discovery menu Search Tips Browse Apps About YouMail Voicemail & Spam Block YouMail See also: Top 10 Apps like YouMail Voicemail & Spam Our top rated spam call blocker, robo call blocker & visual voicemail app will help you handle your phone calls better while protecting you against spam and robocalls. See for yourself why YouMail ha.. 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Read more Browse Apps | Apps like Showbox | Apps like Dave | Apps like Tinder | Apps like Earnin | Apps like Tumblr | Apps like Wish | Apps like Instagram | Apps like Flipagram | Apps like Snapchat Apps like Letgo | You must have JavaScript enabled in your browser to utilize the functionality of this website. About UsPricing and PlansFAQRequest a quoteContact Us CART 0 10 Funny Voicemail Greetings Recorded by Celebrities BY Natalie Ramirez 24. "Thank you for calling [company]. We're closed for [holiday] from [date] until [date]. Please leave your message and we'll get back to you as soon as possible. Have a happy holiday season!" Click here to watch the Youtube video of Adele singing an acapella version of “Hello.” Customize Your Voicemail! Customizing your outbound voicemail greeting for different callers is just the tip of the iceberg! Sign up today for FREE! Enhanced visual voicemail. Call blocking. Voicemail sharing. Voicemail to email. Voicemail to text. a good personal voicemail greeting funny voicemail setup funny voicemail greetings soundboard Close Project prerecorded funny voicemail greetings Little things like a great voicemail can really set you apart from your competition. Think about it. Would you be more inclined to want to interview someone who is shouting about how much they hate calling people back, or the person who simply asks you to leave a message? Andrea (she/her) is our head of PR at Snagajob, where she’s focused on telling the world how we help hourly workers and employers. Her first hourly job was as a lifeguard. EmployersPost JobsPost a ShiftWhy Snagajob?Our SolutionsRecruiting and Hiring AdviceOur CustomersEmployer ReboundBrowse ProfilesContact Us Hello, you've reached 555-1552, the Apartment at the End of the Universe. Please leave your message, name and number at the sound of the tone. Keep your hands, feet, extremities, and obscenities inside the car at all times. Enjoy your ride. Hi. I’m probably home. I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like. Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you. Hi, this is _____. I’m sorry I can’t answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back. Hello, this is _____. I’m not home right now, but I can take a message. Please leave a message as soon as possible and I'll get back to you at the sound of the tone. 29. Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back. 30. Hello, this is Ron. I'm not home right now, but I can take a message. 10. Max Wait Time Reached Message. What the caller hears when they have been waiting in the queue for the maximum amount of time. Sample Scripts: “You have exceeded the waiting limit for this queue. best voicemail funny what are the best voicemail transcription apps how to greet someone in a conference call Close Project how to call someone else's voicemail 5. The Urgency + Mystery Combo. Once you’ve gotten the basics of those last four scripts, you can combine examples to get even more creative. You are here: Home / IT Jobs / Interesting Voicemail Greeting Examples to Cheer Up Your Callers Back in 1997, Seinfeld’s character, George Costanza, attempts to avoid a breakup call from his girlfriend and we hear his comical outgoing machine recording. It includes two phone handsets and stores up to 17 minutes of messages to accommodate plenty of calls. We also love the VTech CS6729-5 DECT 6.0 Cordless Phone System with Digital Answering Machine because it includes five handsets, stores up to 14 minutes of messages, and allows you to remotely access your messages. Filter Type All Time Past 24 Hours Past Week Past month Contact List Found1. 603-413-4124 New Contact Listing› Abu Dhabi Islamic Bank› Rocketreach› Amigo Mexican Restaurant› How To Connect A Ps4 Controller To Steam› Westlake Financial Services› Snapfon Eztwo Unlocked› Rockstar Games› Defense Health Agency› Aged Care Decisions› Abc Accounting And Tax Services› Betterhelp› Metro Services Inc› Iphone› Social Security Administration› Activtrades› Epic Games› Metamask› Rosedale ServiceBrowse All Listing » Frequently Asked QuestionsCan you put a funny message on Your Answering Machine? Phone Solicitor Discouragement: The Long-Winded Voicemail Message. November 12, 2014. November 12, 2014 by funny. By pure, ridiculous serendipity, I found a way to almost bring a stop to phone solicitor calls, a major nuisance for dinosaurs who wish to hang onto their land lines. 5. "Hello, [Person's name] is chasing new adventures and is no longer with [Company name]. Please forward all future requests to [New or interim person's name] at [phone number]. non professional voicemail greetings free professional voicemail greetings pre recorded business voicemail greetings Close Project X