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You must have JavaScript enabled in your browser to utilize the functionality of this website. There are very few cases in which our telephone answering service would recommend having an antiquated voicemail answer your incoming calls.

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No36: Hello, this is Marlin's answering machine reminding you that yesterday was the last day of the previous period of your life. After the beep you can tell me how it was, or leave some other, informative message. Thanks. No37: I can't come to the phone now, so... Hey -- that's a nice phone you have there. Hey sugar, you call this number often? I bet you have answering machines bothering you all the time... Yes indeedy. Why don't you give me a call sometime and we can listen to some old recordings... I might even play my beep for you.
There’s another one that’s a little woman that looks like mother goose. She’s beating him! She’s beating him! She’s got a huge bag! She’s beating him. She’s got this big bag! It’s huge, it’s about the size of her. .

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39 Humorous and Witty Voicemail Greetings. Oct 28, 2015. Jan 7, 2014 by Brandon Gaille. Recent trends in voicemail have leaned towards the desire for many individuals to relate on other forms of digital message than traditional voice mails. More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time.
8. Morgan Freeman Shares His Voice for Voicemail Greetings. Morgan Freeman is known for his voice so much that he was asked to play the voice and image of God in Bruce Almighty.

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Get in touch with us and we'll talk However, if you are offering to buy dinner, I may be available sooner than you think. Thanks for calling. They go on and on, wasting your time. I pledge to you, my caller that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me.
“You’ve reached Bernice’s phone. I’m getting a tooth pulled on Tuesday and don’t feel like talking. In fact, I’ll probably sleep for about four days after the procedure. Tooth resorption is not a joke, friends. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Let your human brush your damn teeth, even if it feels like you’re about to DIE by way of tiny toothbrush. Also, I’ll be accepting gifts of gravy in the days following the extraction.”

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Top 13 Professional Voicemail Greetings – Examples, Scripts, Samples, Audio Recordings

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Weren’t these messages funny and wacky for your machine. Of course, you have to be a bit careful as to what you say and record on your machine. You don’t want to offend anyone or say something that might upset your listeners. So be absolutely sure. And, if you have any more voicemail ideas, do let us know by leaving a comment below. Till then, I’d like to… beep.

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    34. Hello, this is [your name]. I’m currently out of the office celebrating [X holiday]. I’ll be back on [X date], so leave a quick message and I’ll be sure to return your call when I get back. Have a happy [holiday]!
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  • funny voicemail greetings examples

    Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are and what you want, so at the sound of the tone, please hang up.

    As the drugs take hold, you feel you are losing your grip on reality. You begin to hallucinate. You see a telephone, the telephone is next to an answering machine. You hear a faint click and a light flashes on the answering machine. You hear a beep.
    OK, so I followed all the instructions that came with the machine. I pressed all the necessary buttons. So… now what? I… am… so… confused. Could you please… beep. Hello, this is name.However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so we hope these funny voicemail greetings bring you a smile. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Just kidding, buddy. And as the old adage reminds us, first impressions are everything. Step 2 Record a message using a friend who speaks in a deep, low, creepy voice and says "[your name] can't come to the phone.

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    5. The Urgency + Mystery Combo. Once you’ve gotten the basics of those last four scripts, you can combine examples to get even more creative.

    Hello, this is John’s answering machine reminding you that yesterday was the last day of the previous period of your life. After the beep you can tell me how it was, or leave some other, informative message. Thanks.
    Enjoy the short voice mail greetings that are sure to be funny. Use this at your own risk! This is the operator, what number were you trying to dial?

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    Hi, this is Tom, the sales manager at Orlando Powersports. I’m either busy assisting customers, getting ready for our End of Season Sale, featuring deep discounts on our huge selection of power sports equipment and gear or if I’m really lucky, I’m out riding the latest CAN-AM DS 250! Leave a message, and I will call you back as soon as possible. Thanks for calling!

    Is it an interactive automated service, or just a “please provide the following information and someone will contact you shortly” kind of thing? I'm referring to your Vumber number greeting/interaction with the seller during their first ever reach out to you via your postcard. Am I making sense? I have pneumonia so I'm a bit hazy… 😛
    4. Hi, thanks for calling GetVoIP. We would love to help you out in anyway we can, but these Holidays are keeping us from getting anything done! We will be returning to the office after the New Year on Jan 2nd, but feel free to head over to our website GetVoIP.com to learn what you can. Happy holidays!

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Don’t leave customers and colleagues on edge. If you say you’re going to call them back, follow up. If you tend to fall behind in this area, encourage them to email you or reach out in another way. Better yet, learn how to forward voicemail to email so you can access the message anywhere.

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OK, so I followed all the instructions that came with the machine. I pressed all the necessary buttons. So… now what? I… am… so… confused. Could you please… beep.

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God's Voice mail lol Jesus's Voice mail

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It is really important to strike a balance between coming off as too cold, conservative and impersonal with making your message too out there, long or eccentric. If you can create something memorable, it will help engage a caller, or potential client. Go too far off the deep end, and you’ll scare them away

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