funny voicemail transcriptions

Not sure if this is real or not (and either is snopes, see below). But, it sure is funny. Happy Monday! EDIT: Try this link. This is where I got it from, I didn't try the one below and it apparently doesn't work: Claim: Voicemail message describes a confrontation between a male motorist and four women after a minor traffic accident.

Don't mess with Bible-totin' old ladies.. Read this little explanation and then listen to the voicemail. You just have to laugh with the guy. On a recent Spurs trip, we were asking one of our sponsors who works at Jack in the Box for some funny stories or experiences with the company. The funniest story he had was when an operations manager was late for a meeting and called his boss to tell him he was running late. As he was leaving the voice mail message, he witnessed an accident and went on to provide "play by play" of the incident. After telling us the story, he promised to send us a copy of the voice mail and here it is. This is the actual voice mail message. It was passed along and forwarded so many times within Jack in the Box; it crashed their voice mail server. Origins: In one memorable episode of the 1970s television sitcom All in the Family, Archie Bunker is involved in a minor traffic accident and, eager to cash in on the incident, rushes out and engages a Jewish lawyer to sue the other party. However, after conferring with the defendant's attorney, Archie's lawyer advises him that he has http://www.snopes.com/autos/graphics/fight.gif no case, as the other side's witnesses are too strong. There's an old legal precept, he informs Archie: "You can't beat a station wagon full of nuns." Perhaps Archie Bunker couldn't beat a station wagon full of nuns, but according to a circulating audio clip, an Impala full of Bible-toting middle-aged women could beat (literally!) the motorist who ran into them. We present the recording for your listening enjoyment through [url="http://www.snopes.com/autos/audio/jackbox.mp3"]this (http://home.swbell.net/kf5tv/voicemail.mp3) link. The file size of the clip is over 4MB, so please be patient while it downloads. As to the questions of whether the account given above is an accurate explanation of the origins of this audio clip, and whether the traffic incident described actually took place, we have to leave them as "Undetermined" for now. A inquiry posed to the corporate offices of Jack in the Box restaurants produced the following response: Thank you for your inquiry. The message that has been in circulation is an actual voice mail message. The incident occurred 5-6 years ago in Texas. I'm not sure how the recording got outside the company or if the employee still works for Jack in the Box, but the recording periodically re-surfaces on the radio and the internet. Even if this explanation is accurate (i.e., the clip originated as a message left on a Jack in the Box employee's voicemail), it doesn't preclude the possibility that the accident described never took place, and the recording was just a prank one employee pulled on a co-worker. funny voicemail answers "I totally get why some animals eat their young," Pepper said. - Author: Jamie Farrell #2. The story of life is quicker then the blink of an eye, the story of love is hello, goodbye. - Author: Jimi Hendrix #3. Say that this is real. That it counts. - Author: Cora Carmack #4. Everywhere I go, everyone I talk with, everyone I think about - their salvation is what is on my mind. I love fellowship with Christians, but I can't become preoccupied with the pleasure of fellowship when I know that sinners are sinking into hell. - Author: Kirk Cameron #5. I've taken the leap of faith to stop punching the company time clock and start working for myself. I'm now the CEO of Starfish Media Group, my production company, in New York City. - Author: Soledad O'Brien #6. Far from being an aberration that is not representative of Christianity, the persecution of heretics follows logically from the connection of faith and salvation as presented by Jesus in the Gospels. - Author: Shadia Drury #7. You're always against the clock. But really just fighting for quality. - Author: Cary Fukunaga #8. When nature calls, I don't let it go to voicemail. - Author: Nenia Campbell #9. I'm talking about science on the leading edge, where it's not clear which way things are going be cause we don't know, and I'm dealing with areas which we don't know about. - Author: Rupert Sheldrake #10. Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. - Author: Dalai Lama XIV #11. After years of doing it, you learn the difference between your ego and your opinion. When you're married you have to cut through that. - Author: Dan Castellaneta #12. Some things are impossible. - Author: Alex Van Halen 10. 1-888-447-5594: Epic speech. This last entry on the prank call numbers list is one that is slightly out of the box. These digits are an Easter Egg line for the ending of the video game God of War. . professional.voicemail greeting Are you ready to talk to the answering machine? Now you can with MY voice message. It listens, records, and even has a beep! Unlike other voicemails, every word is heard. This is a huge value, all for just 2 easy payments and one complicated payment. If you leave a message within the next 10 seconds, I will return your call free of charge. This offer is not available in stores, so leave a message now. Self-evident Jane Barbe (not a real recording, her real voice mashup) makes sure that you know… Sometimes, you need to step away from work and live a little! This is perfectly okay, but make sure you leave a well-recorded voicemail greeting to keep your customers happy and content. Read these two examples of professional vacation greetings. how to call a number and get voicemail A custom phone greeting is a recording that plays automatically when a customer calls. They can be set to play right at the start as a professional welcome, as a voicemail greeting, or even as an away message when you can’t answer. 37. Hi, this is [company name]. Sorry we missed your call. Leave a message and we’ll get back to you shortly. how to greet on a conference call 8. Hello, you’ve reached [your name], [your job title] at [your company]. I’m sorry for missing your call, but if you leave a message that includes your name and contact information, I’ll get in touch as soon as I can. personal voicemail greeting messages funny voicemail options funny but professional voicemail greetings what is the difference between voicemail and voice message download funny voicemail greetings funny voicemail recording what is a visual voice message business voicemail greetings with extensions best voicemail funny best funny voicemail funny business voicemail greetings voice message examples funny funny voicemail greetings mental health hotline This message will self destruct. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it. The President is not in his office at this time. funny voicemail raps Want to snag it (even as a starting point) so you don't have to go back through that video and type the whole freaking thing out? Departments and teams are typically organized by function – customer service, tech support, sales, billing questions, etc. When a team is busy handling other calls, encourage your callers to leave a message and reassure them that you will get back to them within a reasonable time frame. It’s important that you actually follow through to avoid upsetting your callers. Well, I didn't see it. Can't imagine I'm the only one. Many of us don't live online. Reply Closed Thread Share Facebook Twitter Reddit Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information - phone greeting ideas More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time. However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller. The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail. 16. "Hmm. Gryffindor … No, Ravenclaw. Yes, you definitely belong in Ravenclaw. *Pause.* Okay, you haven't reached the Sorting Hat — it's the voicemail of [your name]. Please leave your name and number (and just for fun, the Harry Potter house you think you belong in) and I'll return your call as soon as possible." Free Voicemail & Answer Machine Messages › Discover The Best Education www.freefonefun.co.uk Education Use These Funny Messages To Customise Your Mobile Phone Voicemail.Or Use Them On Your Answer Machine At Home. Save one of these FREE mp3 files to your computer, play it through your computer speakers and record it through your mobile to your customisable voicemail service. best voicemail for sales If anything big changes- address, phone, etc.- make sure you correct your voicemail early on. Keep It Short; We know, we know. We just gave you all this information and we’re now telling you to ‘keep it short‘. But, a professional voicemail greeting (or any for that matter) shouldn’t go beyond 20-25 seconds. 8. "Hi, you've reached [your name]. I'm unable to come to the phone right now. But if you leave your name, number, and a short message, I'll be sure to call back. Website: https://www.mightycall.com/blog/the-best-services-to-record-a-voicemail-greeting-for-business/ what should my voice message say 12. "Hi, you've reached [company]. We're available by phone from [hour] to [hour] [time zone] Monday through Friday [optional: and from hour to hour on the weekends]. You can also contact us by going to our website, [URL], and live-chatting or emailing us. If you'd like us to call you back, please leave your name and number after the tone." Not everyone is not going to return your voicemail messages. However, by using these techniques you will certainly get a lot more callbacks than if you were to use the normal long winded and weak salesperson voicemail that is left by so many salespeople. Good luck! Win more clients by creating impressive digital business proposals, price quotes, and contracts using ClientPoint Software He’s hit him in the head with the bible. She picked the bible up and lifted it way over her head…and she’s still beating the hell out of this guy. She picked this bible up and raised it above her head and beamed the guy. 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Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets. Contact Us When you want to add some uniqueness to your voicemail, they are the perfect choice.These cool voice mail ideas given below will eliminate the mundane impact and leave you fresh voice mail.So, take a look at some interesting greetings that you can use as your funny phone voice mail idea (or home phone ). Send Message Create an account. I agree to the license terms. Sign Up You already have an account? Login here. professional phone greeting recording Free Phone Message Template Funny Answering Machine Free Phone Message Template Witty Answer Messages Funny Funny Voicemail Greeting Example A Greetings For Cell Phones Waiting Bd Funny Answering Machine Voicemail Messages Voicemail Messages Cartoons And Comics Funny Pictures From Related : Funny Voicemail Greetings Audio. Like I said earlier, 99.9% of voicemail greetings are exactly the same. Go outside the box and create a hilarious voicemail greeting. Comedic messages create a memorable experience, encourage word of mouth and keep your callers on the line. Seems like a winning formula to me. 3. Stammer-Filled Voicemail Greeting from Jimmy Stewart. Jimmy Stewart, born James Maitland Stewart, has a voice that is unmistakable and 100% unique to him. Jaysukh Patel is the founder of howtoisolve. Also self Professional Developer, Techno lover mainly for iPhone, iPad, iPod Touch and iOS, Jaysukh is one of responsible person in his family. Contact On: [email protected] [OR] [email protected] Best iPhone 13 Pro Max Armband Cases in 2021 Best Keyboard Case for iPad 9th Generation 2021 [10.2] IS The iPhone 13 Waterproof? Here’s Full Truth Best iPhone 13 Pro Max MagSafe Cases in 2021 Best iPhone 13 Pro Battery Case in 2021:- iPhone 13 Supported Funny Voicemail Greetings Answering Machine Messages Pa funny answering machine greetings mp3 is important information accompanied by photo and HD pictures sourced from all websites in the world. Download this image for free in High-Definition resolution the choice "download button" below. HA HA HA! That was my mom's answering machine for most of my high school years!! I Loved it! The A is for... one was my boyfriends when he lived in the dorms but thankfully it's normal now! lol did you hear about the lady who was a big Tom Selleck fan ? she taped a scene from magnum which had his answering mahine on in it and used it for her machine. imagine getting Tom Selleck s voice when you called home. I do think it is kind of creepy to hear a dead person s voice because the survirors can t bear to erase the tape. i totally need to change my answering machine msg and im definately gonna use one of those!! lol those cracked me up!!! - would consider changing my message to the hynosis one. hi, i'm not here right now to talk with you. in the meantime, while you wait for my return, you can strip naked and run around in the streets yelling "buga buga buga". it won't make me respond sooner, but there will be some nice folks wearing white coats who will be happy to talk to you. Your name or email address: Do you already have an account? No, create an account now. Yes, my password is: Forums > Leisure and Society > Hobbies, Interests & Entertainment > Clean/Christian Jokes > A Whipp Media Site Contact Us Help Home Terms and Christian Forum Rules Privacy Policy ! how to greet on video call how to call someone's voicemail directly verizon how to greet someone on video call Close Project best voicemail professional Listing Results Funny Voicemails Ideas 48 Results Phone number Mobile phone Contact us Customer service This is a funny message left on my phone, funny because they called me to tell me I am apparently ... answering-machine automated message phone voice Public Survey Call.wav - mp3 version Public Survey Call.wav - ogg version Public Survey Call.wav - waveform Public Survey Call.wav - spectrogram 15313.6 life telephone answering-machine beep answer-phone home message annoying before-after remix 2 of 117530__fiatknox__The_Great_Machine_Speaks.flac - mp3 version before-after remix 2 of 117530__fiatknox__The_Great_Machine_Speaks.flac - ogg version before-after remix 2 of 117530__fiatknox__The_Great_Machine_Speaks.flac - waveform before-after remix 2 of 117530__fiatknox__The_Great_Machine_Speaks.flac - spectrogram 56319.2 The Great Machine Speaks.mp3 - mp3 version The Great Machine Speaks.mp3 - ogg version The Great Machine Speaks.mp3 - waveform The Great Machine Speaks.mp3 - spectrogram 15181.0 answer echo god-machine voicemail Error Dial Answering Machine - mp3 version Error Dial Answering Machine - ogg version Error Dial Answering Machine - waveform Error Dial Answering Machine - spectrogram 32304.8 Get creative. Poke good-natured fun, or tease them with your dry or self-deprecating humor. Remember that the goal is to make them feel happy to start the day, and not the other way around! 15. Hello, you’ve called [X Business Name]. We are currently closed. Our opening hours are [State opening hours]. Please visit our company website at [company website URL], or email us at [X email address]. If you’d like a callback, please leave your name and phone number, and our team will get in touch with you within 24 hours. 10. 1-888-447-5594: Epic speech. This last entry on the prank call numbers list is one that is slightly out of the box. These digits are an Easter Egg line for the ending of the video game God of War. The first call is from a man that looked in the yellow pages under the pest control category and decided that we looked like the right people to call to report that 3 men were throwing a dead goat into a dumpster. seven best business voicemail greetings funny greetings for your phone fun business voicemail greetings Close Project funny voicemail to call 10. Nobody Misses The Clever Answering Machine Message. Connect Your Team All Under One Number, No Matter If They Are Working Down The Hall Or Across The Country. professional voicemail greetings download Voicemail Funny Greetings For Your Phone Ideas Cell Phones 2 Business Answering Machine Greetings Tips Messages Closed Funny Voicemails Witty Answer Phone Messages Mp3 Voicemail Funny Voicemail Messages 9 Images Greeting Ideas Good Random Numbers To Give People Or Call When Bored Free Funny You can add the flavor of fun and humor to your telephone calls through the use of funny voice mails and answering machine messages. You can devise some innovative voice mail ideas for your answering machine. Just make sure that you do not hurt the sentiments of your callers in any way. 11. "Hi, you've reached [company]. Unfortunately, we're currently unavailable. But we want to talk to you — so please leave your name and number, as well as your reason for calling, and someone will call back ASAP." No more fear! You’re so going to be a gracious master of voicemails. Here are the best tips to help you leave a voicemail message that’s friendly, gets the needed information across, and ends before the dreaded “time’s up” beep! How to record or change your Android voicemail greeting in 10 simple steps. 1. Turn on your phone and launch the Phone app. Turn the power on for your phone. Then, tap the Phone app. 2. Open the dial pad. Tap the dial pad icon near the bottom of the screen to bring up your phone's dial pad. 3. personal voicemail greeting samples short professional voicemail greetings best greeting in call center Close Project free professional voicemail greetings samples 3. YouMail Robocall Blocker & Voicemail. YouMail is one amongst the great free visual voicemail app that acts as spammer and robocalls blocker to protect you from unwanted callers. His mission is to share carefully guarded marketing tips that will help small-medium business compete on a smaller budget. Your email address will not be published. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. Enjoy the short voice mail greetings that are sure to be funny. Use this at your own risk! This is the operator, what number were you trying to dial? Just kidding. Hi! John’s answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I’ll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets. 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All the points you describe are sufficient and up to the mark ..... its really great....Actually i have the same Problem and i also want some help i think this post helps me to overcome my problem.....Thanks for sharing this great thoughts with us....!! villa estartit (http://vakantiehuizenestartit.villamar.nl/findAllVillas.php?filter=Estartit&lang=nl) villa blanes (http://vakantiehuizenblanes.villamar.nl/findAllVillas.php?filter=Blanes&lang=nl ) Q1) I would like to take a US consulate appointment for visitor's visa for my father. We are from southern Andhra Pradesh and Chennai consulate is convenient for us. Since Hyderabad has US consulate, does whole of Andhra come under HYD consulate jurisdiction? or can we take appointment in Chennai Consulate? Could you please let me know? My father is going for visa for the first time. Q2) If visitor passport is expiring in next eight months and if the visitor is residing in US, is it possible to renew the passport here? Or the person has to go back to India and renew the passport there. I would just like to help my parents with the paper work and get it done if possible when they are here. 25. "Hello! Thanks for reaching out to [company]. We're closed today for the holiday, and will reopen tomorrow. If you leave your name, number, and a brief message, we'll give you a call when we're back in the office. Thanks again, and have a great day." what is a casual greeting funny voicemail recordings professional voicemail greetings samples Close Project funny voicemail answers Hi there. This is Joe speaking. I'm home right now, and in a moment, I'll have a decision to make. Leave your name and number and I'll be thinking about it. Website: https://www.shrm.org/ResourcesAndTools/hr-topics/technology/Pages/Personal-Cellphone-Privacy-at-Work.aspx “How do you leave an idiot in suspense? Leave a message, and I’ll get back to you… Bye!” Businesses should have two main types of greetings to create an excellent call experience. The first one is what we call a “welcome greeting” – this greeting welcomes callers to your business. Typically, a welcome greeting will present a menu of call options like hours, location, or customer service. For more details on how to create a welcome greeting for your general business number, read this article. Nobody wants to play phone tag. Skip the back and forth by explicitly telling the caller to leave their name, number, and the best day(s) and time(s) to reach them. Your clients will appreciate you not wanting to waste their time. Home What’s This? Awesome Resources 🌟 REI Blog 🔤 REI Terms 🔢 REI Training Reach Out My Stuff Log in how to greet someone on a call professional phone greeting funny greetings for monthsary Close Project funny voicemail mental health hotline It is really important to strike a balance between coming off as too cold, conservative and impersonal with making your message too out there, long or eccentric. If you can create something memorable, it will help engage a caller, or potential client. Go too far off the deep end, and you’ll scare them away All content protected under the Digital Millennium Copyright Act. Content theft, either print or electronic, is a Federal offense. SERVICES Overview Greetings Voice Prompts Message On Hold PRICING STANDARD PRICING Greetings & Prompts Message On Hold PLANS & PACKAGES Word Credits Message On Hold Plans SOLUTIONS Cloud PBX Recordings IVR Recordings Call Center Recordings EXAMPLES Voices Music By Industry Scripts RESOURCES TOOLS Quoting Calculator Word Estimation Calculator Audio Converter RESOURCES How It Works Contact Us Blog Knowledge Base FAQ PARTNERS Programs Service Providers Resellers SIGN IN GET STARTED Tweet Creating solid business voicemail greetings requires a little finesse. You want to make the best impression and set the right tone. However, sometimes you need to break from the norm and create business voicemails that will do some of the work for you. Whether you are dealing with frustrated callers, want to further promote your business, or have important info to share, here are the top 8 voicemail greetings and sample voicemail scripts your business should consider. Hello. You’ve reached the offices of [Business Name]. At present, our office is closed for repairs. However, you may reach us at our temporary location, at 555-555-3432. There, we will be able to pick up your call, 9 to 5, Monday through Friday. Thank you. Nov 11, 2019 - Explore maru's board "funny voicemail" on Pinterest. See more ideas about voicemail, funny, voicemail greeting. Pricing Features All Features Mobile App Call Menu Options Local & Toll-Free Business Numbers Business Call Routing Client Notes CRM Port My Business Number What is a Virtual Phone System? What is a Virtual Phone Number? Reviews About Us Blog FAQ Log In What is a Professional Voicemail Greeting? Why is Having a Great Business Voicemail Greeting Important? How to Create Your Own Professional Business Voicemail Greeting Record Your Own Text-To Speech Technology Hire Professional Voice-Over Talent Top 13 Professional Voicemail Greetings – Examples, Scripts, Samples, Audio Recordings Company Voicemail Greetings Department Voicemail Greetings Personal Business Voicemail Greetings Small Business Resources for Business & Personal Growth Looney Tunes No Hang-ups No Hang ups Chick Hearn Telephone Answering Tape At the sound of the beep Every Excuse In the Book FurmanNet Matthew Furman Silly answering machine silly greetings messages funny answering machine greetings comedy answering machine silly voicemail silly voice mail novelty greetings funny messages for answering machines funny voicemail tones what are good things to say on a prank call having a funny voicemail message is a good idea because it shows the employer your sense of humor Close Project X