Voicemail: [You can listen to the above video to hear my actual voicemail, and you can also snag the scrip verbatim by simply leaving us a comment below, tell us how you feel about it. đ ]
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Already know who you are and why you've called, please hang up after and we tell each other everything.
We have added expanded forums for the new strategy games Humankind and Old World. Civilization's 30th Birthday Contest: Give Civ a Present, Get One Back! New Forums for Humankind and Old World 100 Of The Funniest Thing To Put On Your Answering Machine Theard Page 1 of 9 1 â 2 3 4 5 6 â 9 Next > Joined: Apr 12, 2003 Messages: 45 Location: at my house Lets try to put 100 of the funniest thigs you can put on your answering machine. I can't think of any thing so somebody else start off, and links to web sites are ok. Chain n' Axe, May 22, 2003 Joined: Apr 10, 2003 Messages: 359 Location: Here " OH MY GOD PUT THE GUN DOWN! PLEASE PUT IT DOWN! BOOM!!!" *beep*
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Hello, and welcome to Answering Machines of the Rich and Famous! Sam can't come to the phone right now because he's spending the week in his beautiful summer home on the French Riviera.
1. If the reason I was calling you was to ask you what kind of music you like, this little interlude would be perfect. But let me assure you, the reason I was calling was NOT to ask you what kind of music you like.
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Is there another postcard to which you were referring in the script video that DOES say that the seller will NOT talk to a real person at first? I'm just a little bit confused about the discrepancy there. But, like I said, I am battling pneumonia so i'm prolly not braining well today. Hard for me to know really.
Please leave your name, phone number, the name of the country you wish to invade, and the secret password. Please leave a message.
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Fiverr is a popular freelance service anyone can use to get creative work â in this case, a personalized voicemail greeting. On Fiverr, you first check out the freelancerâs work samples to evaluate whether theyâre a good fit for your company. We recommend reading feedback and reviews on various creatives, contacting potential freelancers with any questions you have, and browsing through various package options.
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This free voicemail audio clip is to help with verbiage or as using for your own voicemail response. Looking for a voicemail greeting to use instead of your
âHi, this is Ralph. Youâre getting this message because Iâm probably sleeping. Leave your message at the tone and maybe Iâll call you back when Iâm awake. If this is about anything food-related, please press 411 and your call will be rerouted to the dog, who will immediately wake me up to take your call. Do not use 411 because you want to tell me you lost a whisker or your human changed cat litter brands on you. I donât care. Food only! And anyway, why arenât YOU sleeping? Weirdo.â
No48: You have reached 234-1243. This is an answering machine. This is the nineties. You know what to do.
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8. Hi there. This is Joe speaking. Iâm home right now, and in a moment Iâll have a decision to make. Leave your name and number and Iâll be thinking about itâŚ
When you leave a voicemail do not use your full name because that immediately raises a red flat that you are a salesperson making a cold call. Instead, say your first name only followed by your company name. This will make your customer feel that you are much more familiar with each other than you really are. Saying your last name would defeat the whole purpose of demonstrating familiarity.
Hi. If this is my parents, I need some money you guys. If this is my friend, Iâll get you your money. If this is a hot girl, DO NOT listen to a word I said before. I got plenty of money for you.
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âHello, youâve reached the special agent Bond. James Bond. Okay okay, itâs actually [last name]. Iâm currently away saving the world on a top-secret mission but I will get back to you as soon as possible. Please leave your name, contact info, number, and availability and Iâll call back as soon as Iâm done helping M16. Have a great day. [last name] out!â
I love jokes. You want to know something I hate? Wanna hear a joke? Knock, knock! Hello, and thank you for calling the Starstripe Mental Hospital.
After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you and I'll think about returning your call. Thus, it is important for you to be clear while recording such messages. We hope you enjoyed these funny voicemail greetings! Since our business answering service is open 24 hours a day, you'll never be greeted by a voicemail greeting requesting you to leave a message.
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If this were the best of all possible worlds, I could come to the phone right now, but I can't, so if you could leave your name and number, I'd appreciate it.
Smith suggests the following sample messages for other typical voice mail messages a veterinarian or veterinary practice team member might need to leave. If youâre calling to see how a pet is doing after a recent medical encounter/treatment: Voice mail â âMs. Smith, this is Dr. Vet just checking in on Fluffy. If you have any questions, please contact our office at 212.555.1234.â Email â âMs. Smith, this is Dr. Vet just checking in on Fluffy. If you have any questions, please contact our office at 212.555.1234.â If youâre calling with a petâs medical results or treatment decisions: Good news voice mail â âMs. Smith, this is Dr. Vet, and you will be glad to hear all of Fluffyâs testing came back fine. She is good to go until her next appointment.â Bad news voice mail â âMs. Smith, this is Dr. Vet, and we have the results of Fluffyâs tests. Please call our office at 212.555.1234 so that we can discuss these results.â Tips for connecting with clients
Perhaps this guy was tired, maybe having a bad day, and hopefully he doesnât leave this type of message regularly.
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4.) Keep your voicemail message to two points. If you need to share more information, then say in your voicemail that youâre going to send the person an e-mail message with the rest of the details. â⌠Iâm calling to share that we have finalized the ⌠and lastly, that we know youâd like to meet at 9:00 AM as we discussed. However, is Tuesday or Wednesday better for your teamâs schedule? âŚ.â
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Hello, you have reached the automated answering service for (your name), your message will be answered to in the order in which it was received, your message is number 8,243, please hold, your message is important to me.
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Out Now: âCollection of SaGa: Final Fantasy Legendâ, âPokemon UNITEâ, âIndiesâ Liesâ, âThe Lord of the Rings: Rise to Warâ, âProject ICHRâ, âUnholy Societyâ and More
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Funny Voicemail Messages Thatâll Tickle Your Callersâ Funny Bone. There is plenty of room for being creative. You can always modify and personalize voicemail messages depending on your sense of humor. Keep it light and simple! ⢠As long as phones can ring and eyes can see, leave a message, and Iâll get back to thee.
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Hi, youâve reached the home of [name]. If you are calling to collect a student loan, gambling debt, or other obligation, please press 1 and hang up now. If you are selling any product or service, or requesting charitable donations, please press 2 and hang up now. Otherwise, press 3 and leave your message now. Pressing 3 is optional.
Hey, it's ________. Sorry you can't get through. Leave your name and your number and I'll get back to you.
âHoliday voicemail greeting is the perfect opportunity to personalize the usually neutral corporate communication.â 9 scripts for holiday voicemail greetings. Below we have listed several ideas for great voicemail messages, depending on your companyâs needs. 1. Happy [X holiday]! Youâve reached [ âŚ
-Hello. All of our operators are busy right now, but if youâll leave your name, telephone number, a brief message, and the time you called, weâll get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you and have a pleasant day.
-Hi. Iâm probably home. Iâm just avoiding someone I donât like. Leave me a message, and if I donât call back, itâs you.
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Want to snag it (even as a starting point) so you don't have to go back through that video and type the whole freaking thing out?
I know you're angry because I never answer your phone.So, to fix this, I think you guys should give me a birthday present: cell phone..(Make a little noise in the background ).Hi, you are already at your friend's house.
âGood morning. Youâve reached the voicemail of [your name]. Today is [date]. Please leave me a message with your name and contact information. Oh, and hereâs my motivational quote of the day: [read quote].â
There are many times during a busy work day that you will have to be away from your phone. Meetings, lunches, bathroom breaks and more. 5 Not available to answer the call voicemail scripts and demos
A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So leave a message.
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Professional voicemails are important, because theyâre an extension of your personal brand, reflecting what level of professionalism you offer. Use these voicemail greetings for work or personal cell phone messages for your specific needs. You can choose a voice that will best suit your business and will deliver a warm and professional voice message. Your callers donât want to hear a cold and indifferent machine voice. The information you want to put in your voicemail should be succinct enough for your callers to get every bit of information they need. Leave the relevant information in a clear and precise manner. Professional voicemail greetings for work should be informative. The first message the customer hears should have the companyâs name so they can be sure theyâve reached the right number. Be courteous and informative. This could be their first point of contact, and you want it to be enjoyable. You may also like 30 Best Wishes and Congratulations for New Business Adventures If youâre going to make your voicemail message humorous in some way, it should be tasteful and aligned to your brand. It shouldnât get in the way of giving customers enough information when they call. Your voicemail greetings for work should be welcoming and friendly but not too informal. Customers want to feel confident that theyâve contacted a professional, that the company values their call, and they have made the right choice. So be friendly but not too nonchalant. Your voicemail greeting should be clear, concise and to-the-point. You donât have to put your clients through a sales pitch when they are trying to just get some information.
what should i say in my personal voicemail greeting
Are you thinking about changing your voicemail greeting? Would you like some help from us? Set up a cranky, funny voicemail, and share a moment of laughter with your dear ones, before they understand your intention behind it and run to get you!
hi you've reached the home of (name) also known as 007 agents if you get this machine we are probably saving the world this tape will self destruct in 5...4...3...2...1... (BEEP)
Wrap up with a call to action, an explicit call to action again speaking to their subconscious mind. So here's what you have to do next. Take a moment, leave me a message with your name, phone number twice, including your area code, the address of the property you're thinking of selling, your asking price. A lot of people don't like to include that because they don't want the seller fixating on a price. I like to know what's on their mind if they even have a starting point. You noticed, I don't say what you're asking, what, what you need to get for the property, because I'm probably not going to be able to offer them their asking price, but I'd like to know what, if anything, they have in mind.
6. Adele Sings Hello as an Outgoing Phone Message. A great way to incorporate a fun voicemail greeting in todayâs age is re-writing the lyrics to a current billboard topping hit.
Other jokes and witty lines can be recorded for your callers that may bewilder a silence after the tone, or you might get to hear laughs that started before the beep, or you might throw someone off into the old routine of âWhat?âŚHello?âŚAre youâIs this?âŚAm I leaving a message?â But you want fresh ideas. You can borrow mine to entertain your callers. Let me know their reactions. This one sounds like you are a corporation that has several operators who are busy with a large volume of calls. Includes elevator muzak and sound effects. Welcome. Due to a large volume of calls, all of our operators are busy. Please hold for the next available operator. (Music) Our operators are still busy. Please stay on the line while your call is being transferred to the Voice recording database. (connection) Infomercial that sells your messages in a rushed and enthusiastic manner. Borrowed the âcomplicated paymentâ from Mitch Hedburg.
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4. Hi, thanks for calling GetVoIP. We would love to help you out in anyway we can, but these Holidays are keeping us from getting anything done! We will be returning to the office after the New Year on Jan 2nd, but feel free to head over to our website GetVoIP.com to learn what you can. Happy holidays!
Get in touch with us and we'll talk However, if you are offering to buy dinner, I may be available sooner than you think. Thanks for calling. They go on and on, wasting your time. I pledge to you, my caller that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me.
Website: https://funnypng.blogspot.com/1976/12/funny-voicemail-greetings-audio.html
OK, so I followed all the instructions that came with the machine. I pressed all the necessary buttons. So⌠now what? I⌠am⌠so⌠confused. Could you please⌠beep. Hello, this is name.However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so we hope these funny voicemail greetings bring you a smile. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Just kidding, buddy. And as the old adage reminds us, first impressions are everything. Step 2 Record a message using a friend who speaks in a deep, low, creepy voice and says "[your name] can't come to the phone.
We use cookies and tracking technologies to offer you a better browsing experience, analyze site traffic, and improve the website. By clicking âAccept Cookiesâ, you expressly agree to our use of cookies and tracking technologies in accordance with our Cookie Policy. If you wish to prevent your data from being used by Google Analytics you can opt-out below. Accept Cookies Google Analytics Opt-Out Log In | Request Account Subscribe to e-Alerts LinkedIn YouTube Facebook Instagram Twitter Who We Serve Products Solutions & Services About Us Insights & Publications Account The AmerisourceBergen Network LinkedIn YouTube Facebook Instagram Twitter December 13, 2017 The Ideal Voicemail Message By Roxanne Hawn Strategies for connecting and moving the conversation forward
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Funny Voicemail Message 20. I didnât answer your call because, well, I didnât want to. Funny Voicemail Message 21. I had the phone ringing in my hand but was too lazy to answer it. Leave a message. Funny Voicemail Message 22. If you are a male, keep your voice and say you are a âŚ
For those with voicemail greetings that get changed about as often as a new president is elected, know that this is doing a serious disservice to the caller-recipient relationship. It signals to callers that the business is anything but an authority, most likely not very detail oriented, and has questionable overall credibility and competency. Those arenât traits that any business wants to associate itself.
Feel free to add a personal touch to make your voicemail message fun and interesting. Clients will feel reassured when they know their messages have been received and you will get back to them.
5. The Urgency + Mystery Combo. Once youâve gotten the basics of those last four scripts, you can combine examples to get even more creative.
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5. Delay Announcement. What the caller hears every two minutes that they are in the waiting queue. Sample Scripts: âThank you for your patience. All of our agents are still busy.
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4. Funny Voicemail Greetings. Hi, youâve reached [your name] at [X company]. We are busy trying to save the world by [what your company does best]. If you want to learn more about how we do it, please leave us your name and phone number, and we will get back to you as soon as our mission is completeâ which should be fairly soon.
ProfileFriendsGroupsDiscussionsCommentsReading ChallengeKindle Notes & HighlightsQuotesFavorite genresFriendsâ recommendationsAccount settingsHelpSign out Start by marking âNo Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messagesâ as Want to Read: Weâd love your help. Let us know whatâs wrong with this preview of No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages by John Carfi. Problem: Itâs the wrong book Itâs the wrong edition Other Not the book youâre looking for? Preview â No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages by John Carfi liked it 3.00 ¡ Rating details ¡ 3 ratings ¡ 1 review Published March 28th 1984 by CCC Publications (first published March 1984) 0918259002 (ISBN13: 9780918259004) To ask other readers questions about No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages, please sign up. Be the first to ask a question about No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages This book is not yet featured on Listopia. Add this book to your favorite list Âť Aug 02, 2014 Kelly rated it liked it I like this book. Great, snarky answering machine messages. There's something so special about each class of debut YA authors; after all, young adult fiction is all about the hopefulness of new... Company About us Careers Terms Privacy Interest Based Ads Ad Preferences Help AirPods AirPods Max AirPods Pro Apple Car Apple Deals Apple Glasses Apple Pay Apple Pro Display XDR Apple TV Apple Watch SE Apple Watch Series 7 CarPlay HomePod HomePod mini iMac iOS 14 iOS 15 iPad iPad Air iPad mini iPad Pro iPadOS 14 iPadOS 15 iPhone 11 iPhone 12 iPhone 13 iPhone 13 Pro iPhone 14 iPhone SE 2020 iPod touch Mac mini Mac Pro MacBook Air MacBook Pro 13" MacBook Pro 16" macOS Big Sur macOS Monterey watchOS 7 watchOS 8 Home New Posts Forum List Trending New Threads New Media Spy New posts WikiPost Latest summaries Watched WikiPosts Support FAQ and Rules Contact Us Thread starter patrick0brien Start date Jun 14, 2006 Sort by reaction score
My voicemail prompts the caller to leave his or her name and number. My dadâs response on his most recent message:
I made this "grouchy voicemail" for whoever is tired of the boring old voicemail your phone service provides. I will have more funny voicemail greetings on
32. Hi, youâve reached [your name] at [X company]. Our office is currently closed until [X date]. Please leave us your name and number, and our team will get back to you as soon as possible. Enjoy [X holiday].
So, I added a, you, uh, your, uh, just a pause or maybe a little chuckle in here or there just to make it sound organic. So right off the top, if we've already spoken about your house and you just need to leave a message, press pound now and leave a message after the tone. So that obviously has a practical use because if sellers call back because that's the only number that they have, maybe the second or third time, I don't want to have to make them endure the entire message before they leave us a message. And that is actually how Vumber works.
