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Dave is out. Jane is out. Rover is out. This is their answering machine. I am in. The beep is in. At the sound of the beep leave your name. At the sound of the beep leave your message.

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AboutPressCopyrightContact usCreatorsAdvertiseDevelopersTermsPrivacyPolicy & SafetyHow YouTube worksTest new features Remember Me? FAQ Social Groups Calendar Photo Albums FAQ Social Groups Calendar Mark Forums Read Toyota 4Runner Forum - Largest 4Runner Forum > Toyota 4Runner Forum > Off Topic > Very very funny voicemail Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes 03-07-2005, 11:56 PM #1 Reply With Quote Satman View Public Profile Find More Posts by Satman 03-08-2005, 12:03 AM #2 Reply With Quote krosno3 View Public Profile Find More Posts by krosno3 03-23-2005, 10:00 AM #3 That was great!!!! Too bad he didn't have a video to go along with it.....Thanks for sharing..... Reply With Quote CruiseDuck View Public Profile Find More Posts by CruiseDuck 03-23-2005, 12:08 PM #4 Man...I'd love to have a beer with that guy...what a crackup....ROTFLOL:jester: Expat View Public Profile Find More Posts by Expat 03-23-2005, 04:47 PM #5 265/65R18 LT BFG All Terrains, ICON Stage 1, SpiderTraxx, WeatherTech Liners, Demello Hybrid Sliders Kenwood DNX-890HD. Boaz View Public Profile Find More Posts by Boaz 03-23-2005, 04:48 PM #6 Reply With Quote 5 : Excellent 4 : Good 3 : Average 2 : Bad 1 : Terrible Similar Threads Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post Funny story fightman80 3rd gen T4Rs 22 10-11-2010 01:28 PM doyouknowwhatihate.com - funny stories bobbyavidity Off Topic 2 08-17-2009 12:23 AM Funny Toyota truck commercials Sidney Classic T4Rs 3 02-01-2008 02:24 AM Funny Old Lady! Thai Off Topic 1 03-09-2006 01:29 AM » Popular Tags 3rd 4runner 4th 5th area back bar battery black brake bumper car control cover door engine find fluid front gen good iphone issue i�m kit lift light lights limited miles mount oem oil part parts plate power pro rack rear replaced road roof running rust sale set shocks side skid springs sr5 start steering stock suspension switch system time tire tires toyota trail trd truck vehicle wheel wheels work wtb » Follow Us!!! Search Engine Optimisation provided by DragonByte SEO (Pro) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2021 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
Movies and Television. There is surely no better way to make voicemail fun than with pop culture references. Tim Gunn . Play off a classic line delivered by Humphrey Bogart in Casablanca. "Of all the messages on all the phones in all the world, you have to leave one for me." .

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Business transition voicemail greetings communicate important information resulting from changes to your business activities driven by things like a new address or remodeling. Keep it light and simple!
Hi, you have reached (names) voicemail. If you want money or to sell us something, we a) gave at the office, b) already have it, or c) don’t want it. If you are a friend, trying to give us money or just want to talk, then leave a message or try my cell phone number.

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Your call is important to us and we will get back to you as soon as possible. Please leave your full name, contact details, phone number, and availability after the beep and we will call you back straight away. Thank you!”
People who call you to talk are few and far between these days. And out of those people, the ones who leave a voicemail are even rarer. We put out a call on social media for saved voicemail recordings, and in a special episode of our podcast, The Outline World Dispatch, Tolu Edionwe talks to those who are holding on to voicemails — from their dead loved ones.

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Seconds later say “HAHA, that was a fake beep created by my mouth. I fooled you good!” A is for A, B is for Beer, C is for C, D is for Drunk. Call me back in 48 hours when I’m R for Recovered! A is for apple, B is for beer and that may be why I’m not here. Leave a message. Alright listen, I’m on one line with my girlfriend and her best friend on the other. Leave a message and if you promise to not tell either of them that I’m a player, I’ll call you back. Back in MY DAY we didn’t use answering machines. We used jumbo sized devices to take messages for us. Those we called “Answering Machines” and I just realized.. I sound like an idiot! Bob is currently in the shower. He’s there an hour per day. I wonder what the heck he does in that time. Oh well, probably plays with himself. Help me.. HELP ME!! My wife wants me in bed. PLEASE CALL 911!!!! HURRY!!! AHHHHH!!! Hi this is Bob’s answering machine and I will need a few things from you. #1 is your full name including middle name. #2 is your address including postal code. #3 is your credit card number with the 3 digit security code on the back. There’s a porn site I want to join and I don’t want to use my moms information. Hi you have reached Bob and I’m not interested in having my grass cut, buying new windows or installing new doors. Hi you’ve reached Bob. If you want to leave a message press 1. If you want to leave a message about how sexy I am, press 2. If you have the wrong number, press 9. As you already can tell, the number pressing doesn’t do anything. I did all this just to feel.. cool.. Hi, I am Bob’s answering machine and he’s pissing me off. Everyday he changes his messages and I’m sick of all the button pressing he does. If you come over, can you please take me? I need a new owner who doesn’t push buttons! Hi, I understand how annoying long messages can be. Why do people always waste so much time talking about crap? Well I’m with you on this one. I can’t stand people who leave long messages talking about nothing useful. Why can’t they just get to the point? All they have to say is “Hey I’m not here cause I’m doing important stuff. Leave a message!” Anyways I kept this message short. Leave one after the beep. Hi, I’m in the process of getting married. Why can’t the priest operate as quick as a microwave? Less than 5 minutes or your money back! Hi, I’m not interested in answering your call right now but my voicemail is. Leave one! Hi, if you’re a telemarketer give me your number and I’ll call you back. What, you don’t want me to call you back? Now you know how I feel! Hi, my name is the answering machine and I record messages in your very own authentic voice. Would you like to increase the size of your penis? I sell those too! Hi, this is Bob’s voicemail and he’s on vacation. He’s in the Caribbean partying with all the tourists. If you like you can rob his place and I won’t say a word! Hi, you’ve reached the pizza delivery guy and I’m trying to make a delivery but am stuck waiting for the train to go by for the 10th time. This customer gets me every time! I had the phone ringing in my hand but was too lazy to answer it. Leave a message. If you are a male, keep your voice and say you are a female. Hi, this is Bob’s girlfriend. I drove him in debt and took his phone. Leave a message and if you sound rich & sexy, you’ll hear back! If you’re calling for Bob, press 1. If you are calling for Greg, press 2. Hey I have some news for you, there’s no Greg at this number. HAHA I lied to you! You got fooled pretty good! I’m pretty drunk & unstable. I think my hands are vibrating. How am I going to hold my next drink without spilling it?? PLEASE TELL ME!! I’m probably too lazy to answer. Leave a message and I’ll call back. If you don’t hear from me, then it’s cause I don’t like you! Keep your original voice Hi, I’m Katie and.. Who did I say I was? Oh man, I gotta keep off the Viagra! Make sound effects with your mouth. Yo Yo Yo.. This is Bob who’s here to make the save. You want to talk to me but I will be charging a fee. Leave a message so I can make enough for a massage! Oh no.. You’re calling.. Someone.. please pull my plug!!! Hello.. anyone there?? NOOOOOO… Oh wicked, I finally got an answering machine. YAY! Now how do you work this thing? Let’s see.. To record message, press the REC button. Alright, where the heck is the REC button? Someone else says out loud Bob you moron, it’s right here and you already pressed it! Then you say Ahh crap! Sorry I don’t answer the phone or check my messages but if you are calling to donate me money, leave a message and I’ll call you back within seconds. Sorry I missed your call. I’m probably running away from the wife. She’s in one of those moods.. AGAIN! This is Bob and I just picked up the best answering machine in the world. The recordings are in high quality. Leave a message now so I can listen to it in 5.1 surround sound! Yo, this is Bob coming to you from the rave, never knowing when to behave. I can rhyme within time and you should leave one before I win a ton! If a telephone rings in an empty room and no one is there to answer it, was there really a phone call? Help me investigate this phenomenon by leaving your name and number after the tone. Funny Joker : I love funny jokes which is probably why I own this very funny jokes website :-) The jokes here are NOT work friendly, you've been warned. Recent Jokes Money Jokes Monster Jokes Time Jokes Bus Jokes Sheep Jokes Cow Jokes Camping Jokes Burger Jokes Weather Puns Weather Jokes Cannibal Jokes Baby Jokes Dad Jokes Grand National Jokes 69 Jokes Accounting Jokes Funny Things to Say at a Drive Thru Understanding Marketing Jokes Sperm Jokes Knock Knock Jokes Free Sex Jokes Funny Bumper Stickers Love at First Sight Joke Computer Jokes Magna Carta Joke

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On this page, we’ve provided some script samples and templates of voicemail greetings and auto attendant messages you can use for your business phone, VOIP service, PBX/PABX system as well as cell/mobile/smart phone greetings. If you need help writing your phone scripts and greetings or want to have your phone recordings professionally recorded by a professional voice talent, contact Macryn

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    Your clients don’t have a lot of time, and neither do you. Use the following short voicemail greetings to get to the point quickly and invite them to leave a message.

    Are you bored of listening, as well as recording standard voice-mail messages in your answering machine? If so, scroll for some really funny voice-mail greetings, which will surely bring a smile on your, as well as your caller’s face.
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  • very professional voicemail greetings

    This call is from a couple of kids that decided to leave a prank on my voicemail. They are acting like they are being attacked by a vampire bat. This kid has left me pranks in the past also.

    Thank you for posting the video. I think the script is well put together and seems somewhat pesonal.
    Please hang up, and check the number, and dial again, and your card number, and check the number again, and ask information operator for assistance for fifteen minutes, and deposit 40 cents.

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    Website: https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/2017/08/169685/songs-with-voicemails-playlist

    If the problem persists, please report this issue to YouMail Support Team. Greeting Copied To Your Account. It will now appear inside your YouMail account under your [Greetings] tab. You can set this as your default greeting, or pick specific Contacts to hear it. Go To My Account Now.
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    With the Holiday season right around the corner, your office’s voicemail greeting should quickly inform callers of any potential changes in hours, days or availability. Oh, and what better way to spread holiday wishes than with a personalized, updated greeting – of course, while at the same time, keeping your clients and prospects in the loop of where you’ll be and when.

    11. Hello, you’ve reached [your name]’s cell phone. I can’t take your call at the moment, but if you leave a brief message, I’ll get back to you as quickly as possible.
    Many of these sites offer to write your voicemail script for you, but you’re welcome to write your own. Whatever you decide, there are many options to suit your needs.

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The most professional voicemail message should include a formal tone and specific instructions. For example, you may say “Hello, you’ve reached [your name], [job title] at [business name]. I’m sorry to have missed your call. Please leave your name, contact information, and reason for calling so I can get back to you promptly.”

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An excellent business voicemail greeting conveys your level of professionalism and competence while also providing your callers with a glimpse into your company’s culture and level of care. As minor as it may seem, your voicemail greeting can instill confidence and trust in your callers or it can be a cause for concern.

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