"Hello, this is John. I'm not home right now, but I can take a message. Hang on a second while I get a pencil." (background noise - open a drawer and shuffle stuff around.) "OK, what would you like me to tell me?" If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will transferred to the mother ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer. If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until someone comes on the line. If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name. If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep, or before the beep, or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you."
It is true, the people we want the most, we have to live without. Saying goodbye to you is such a crazy thing! Promise me this is not the end of everything. Thank you!
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3. Funny Examples of Voicemail Messages. These can be used to play tricks on people on April fools day or for any other reason. Use with discretion. If you don't have a time machine, please leave a message and I'll get back with you in the future.
1. Top Business Ideas 2. Pro Business Guides 3. How to Get Money! 4. Communicate Properly 5. Catchy Names for your Business 6. Creative Slogans for your Business 7. Market Your Business
Voicemail greetings can include any information you’d wish to convey, such as special sales, bargains, alternate phone numbers to use, or your company’s normal working hours.
3. Available Agents Greeting. What callers hear when they are routed to an available agent. Sample Scripts: “Please hold while you are connected to the next available agent.”
So bottom line, I come up with a fair value. If my fair offer is acceptable to you. Again, speaking to their subconscious mind. I'm only a fair guy and all I'm going to do is treat them fairly. You'll subconscious mind get cash in two to four weeks or less, and here please know. Again, I'm just speaking to their nervousness. Nobody's going to try to sell you anything. Rest assured. I'm not interested in convincing you of doing anything. I'm just a local guy, friendly guy, and I'm looking to find a few properties.
MightyCall provides such an answer for businesses. With simple, visually-based call flows, adapting your voicemail messages for different customers and even different times of day demands no tech knowledge and no hardware. Try MightyCall’s business phone system free for 7 days, or book a live demo today.
Classic dad move: Boyfriend's dad left a (phone) message to make sure we got his email. Related Keywords answering machine punsprivate branch exchange punspager punsemail punslandline punstelephone punstelephony punsvonage punscell phone punsmailbox punsmessaging punsintercom punsfaxes punsanswering punscellphone punsmessages punsbeeper punsgmail punspaging punsswitchboard puns
The description reproduced above sets up the following scenario: While an operations manager employed by a restaurant (variously claimed to be Jack in the Box, McDonald’s, Burger King, or some other fast food chain) is commuting to the
Along the way, voice mail usage also suffered significant drops. People not only stopped leaving voice mail messages, they stopped listening to voice mail messages received. In 2012 Vonage, a voice over Internet Protocol (IP) carrier, tracked an 8 percent drop in voice mails left for users. Even worse, Vonage saw a 14 percent drop in people even bothering to listen to voice mail messages others left for them. The company has not released updated stats, but I’d assume the decline continues five years later.
If you’re looking for funny voicemail messages to leave on your answering machine or cell phone, then here are some of the best examples to try. We had a contest to find the most hilarious voicemail messages to make us laugh and thought you might want to try a couple out yourself. Brought to you by Best Answering Service.
Funny - Humorous voicemail greetings for your amusement and use. Professional - Voicemail messages that you can use in an office or business setting. Short - Voicemail greetings that are quick and get straight to the point.
Hi there! You’ve reached the sewer on the next street. I can’t get to the phone right now, but if you take a wee walk, I’ll be at the sewer grate with the red balloon…floating. Please feel free to join me.
Classic dad move: Boyfriend's dad left a (phone) message to make sure we got his email. Related Keywords answering machine punsprivate branch exchange punspager punsemail punslandline punstelephone punstelephony punsvonage punscell phone punsmailbox punsmessaging punsintercom punsfaxes punsanswering punscellphone punsmessages punsbeeper punsgmail punspaging punsswitchboard puns
After hours of brainstorming and countless redos, area man Tom Fulton finally recorded the perfect joke voicemail that no other person will ever bother listening to.
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