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Roses are red, boogers are green, please leave your message on this stupid machine.

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When on vacation, provide your callers with a return date and a back-up contact person to accommodate emergencies. This prevents you from potentially damaging a valued relationship while you enjoy some time off.
A clever, witty voicemail message can be short or long, complex or simple, as long as it is entertaining. Using famous lines from TV shows or movies is a great place to start. There is a lot of creative wordplay that you can use based on famous lines from classics like The Twilight Zone. For instance, you could say, "Hello, you've reached the Twilight Phone, where every message is sent into another dimension. To receive an interdimensional call, just leave your name and number, and I'll call you from the closest parallel universe." .

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I can't come to the phone now, so if, well, actually, I can come to the phone now, I mean, like, I'm at the phone now, recording this message, but I'm doing this now, while you're listening to it later, except for you I guess it's now, like, when you're listening to it ... now I'm confused ... leave a message and I'll explain later.
Now, we’ve covered the topic a bit at length in the past, with sure-fire ways to engage callers with your business voicemail greeting. Still a solid basis for constructing your new voicemail greeting, we’ll cover a quick recap of the most important aspects of a voicemail greeting for those that are unfamiliar.

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This guy is looking to get rid of his "blackish white groundhog guinea pig" and wants us to come pick it up.

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Funny Voicemail Greetings. Thank you for calling Santa's workshop. Santa can't come to the phone right now, and the elves are out back barbecuing Blitzen. After the tone, please leave your Christmas list and maybe we'll get back to you!Thanks for calling Dial-A-Shrink. I can't come to the phone right now, so after the tone, please leave your

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No27: Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back.

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    Good day, you have reached the office of [Name]. I’m away for the weekend. If you require my immediate assistance, please call 555-555-2345. Otherwise, if this is a casual call, please leave your name, number and a brief message, and I’ll get back to you on Monday.

    1. Hi this is [your name], I’m either away from my desk or on the phone, please leave your name and number along with a short message and I’ll be sure to get back to you. 2. I’m sorry, but I’m momentarily tied up. Please leave your name and number, and I’ll …
    Magnificent web site. Plenty of useful info here. I am sending it to a few buddies ans additionally sharing in delicious. And certainly, thanks to your effort!

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    Please leave a message as soon as possible and I'll get back to you at the sound of the tone. 29. Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back. 30. Hello, this is Ron. I'm not home right now, but I can take a message.
    Here are some proven techniques for how to leave a voicemail message that gives you the best chance of getting a call back:

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    Hey before you leave that message, do you want to know something about me? I love jokes. You want to know something I hate?

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    1. HI, you’ve reached (name). I’m so sorry I can’t pick up the call right now because I am standing right behind you. GOTCHA.

    Funny voicemail messages are an excellent alternative for people that are looking for that unique touch for something that seems really mundane. If you’re having trouble coming up with your own then you can check out some of the funny voicemail messages below.
    If a telephone rings in an empty room and no one is there to answer it, was there really a phone call? Help me investigate this phenomenon by leaving your name and number after the tone.

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If you are dying… well that is not our problem and we cannot do anything about it. If you want to sell us something… this number is no longer valid. Thank you for calling Starstripe Mental Hospital, and have a nice day. You have reached the voice mail box of your name. I want to hear what you have to say. You want to know why?

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A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future....

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Now… now, the first step is, is the most important step there is. Liam Neeson has been acting for decades but it was his recent role in the hit movie Taken that caught the attention of a younger audience.

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-If your phone has a gangsta rap ring-back tone, then I might wait for you to answer.

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