Just when we think things can’t get any more brutal, Jimmy tells of how the main assailant – the Godmother if you will – begins to unleash her savage beating:
personal voicemail greeting examples
45. Hi, this is [X department] at [X company]. We’re not able to take your call right now, but if you leave a quick message after the tone, our next available representative will call you back shortly.
“Ummm… uh, listen carefully. I, I have only 10 seconds to explain to you how to leave a message on one of these machines. Now… now, the first step is, is the most important step there is. What, what you’ve gotta do is ummm… and, and, and, and, uh… well.”
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So take a look at some funny greetings that you can use as your funny cell phone voicemail ideas or home phone. My ass and I are out for a walk.
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7. "Hello, this is [your name] at [company]. Thanks for calling. Please leave your name, number, and the reason you'd like to chat, and I'll get back to you ASAP.
10. Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I’ll be right with you. You are half-way there.
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Morgan Freeman is known for his voice so much that he was asked to play the voice and image of God in Bruce Almighty. Allow him to greet your callers and prompt them to leave a message for you. I wish I could tell you that Morgan Freeman was available to take your call. I wish I could tell you that, but this is no fairytale world. Morgan Freeman is gone now; to where I cannot say. Click here to experience this voicemail message on Youtube. Stephen Colbert asked Samuel L. Jackson to record his infamous voice on his outgoing message recording.
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Hello, this is Jim. Unfortunately I can't answer the phone right now because I've just come back from the Mirror Worlds and I'm still made up of antimatter, so if I were to pick up the phone right now, the resulting energy release would make Hiroshima look like a wet firecracker. So leave a message at the tone and I'll get back to you as soon as my component particles have been restored to their normal charges.
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Wanna hear a joke? Knock, knock! Hello, and thank you for calling the Starstripe Mental Hospital. If you need to reach a patient, please press 1 and then say their name. If you are delusional, please have either you or your monkey press 2and we will connect you to Mothership.
Instead of leaving a message on your friend's wall or sending him an email, probably you want to leave a voicemail VMS to your buddy in Facebook and wish him a Happy Birthday. It is true, the people we want the most, we have to live without. Saying goodbye to you is such a crazy thing! Promise me this is not the end of everything. Thank you!Recent trends in voicemail have leaned towards the desire for many individuals to relate on other forms of digital message than traditional voice mails.
Hi, this is Stephanie's answering machine. If you're the phone company asking for money, stop bugging her, she'll send it sooner or later. If you're a TV company advertising TVs, she already has a TV with every channel known to man, and several known to monkeys. If you called for any other reasons, please hang up the phone, start screaming, and run to the nearest shoe store. When you get there, ask them for a cheeseburger. (This probably won't help you, but we'll always have something to laugh about when we're bored.)
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Funny Voicemail Greetings 1. Funny Voicemail Greetings Maintaining a business-like manner is very important in all facets of corporate life. For most companies hiring recording engineers, training is a necessity. But this time, why don't you try something different? Instead of keeping such serious messages, allow us to involve some intriguing
No21: Hi there. This is Joe speaking. I'm home right now, and in a moment, I'll have a decision to make. Leave your name and number and I'll be thinking about it...
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4. The Millennial Greeting. We don’t call anymore, text. Seriously? You’re calling, again? Can everything you have to say be condensed in a text message? Hello, this is [insert name].
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Businesses should have two main types of greetings to create an excellent call experience. The first one is what we call a “welcome greeting” – this greeting welcomes callers to your business. Typically, a welcome greeting will present a menu of call options like hours, location, or customer service. For more details on how to create a welcome greeting for your general business number, read this article.
Informal voicemail greetings are those that don’t adhere to the rules of professional and business voicemail greetings. Here, you are free to just leave a simple greeting, or use it to show your more witty side. This style of greetings can be used for both home and business if you like, depending on the type of caller you expect. For instance, a novelty shop could probably create a rather informal message, using sound effects that represent the type of items they sell.
This call is from a couple of kids that decided to leave a prank on my voicemail. They are acting like they are being attacked by a vampire bat. This kid has left me pranks in the past also.
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6. Pre-Recorded Message Playback. The Perfect Single Businessperson Solution. One Mailbox That Can Transfer Your Callers To Any Phone Of Yours, As Well As Voicemail And Fax To Email.
what to say on your personal voicemail greeting
– Sorry, I can’t be everywhere, and sitting by the phone ready to take your call, just isn’t going to happen. The best thing to do is to leave your message and not be offended that I wasn’t able to speak with you. Thanks.
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I can't come to the phone right now because I'm down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of 20 dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handiwork, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone. If you're from the Department of the Treasury, please ignore this message.
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What kind of company do you run? A law firm may prefer more formal business voicemail greetings than a trendy retail store, for example.
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Click here and listen on Youtube to what it would sound like if Mr. Jackson leant his voice to your voicemail recording.Poly Ringtones. Java Games. Video Clips. Colour Backgrounds. LG Remote Unlocking. Motorola Remote Unlocking.
Thinking of having some fun with your callers while you are away? Here are some funny answering machine greetings and messages. Take a look. Voicemails can give an important message or inform the caller about the receiver's status.Recent trends in voicemail have leaned towards the desire for many individuals to relate on other forms of digital message than traditional voice mails.
The bottom line is that a business’s situation is likely to change often and rapidly, each of which need a unique and applicable voicemail greeting to cover the circumstances and timeline. For example, callers shouldn’t reach a business-as-usual voicemail, and therefore expect a return call within the business day, if the subject they’re calling is out on vacation for two weeks. Such a lack of communication is a recipe to lose that caller’s trust and tarnish the brand’s reputation.
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You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly. What's the funniest/coolest/cleverest/favorite Answering Machine/Voicemail/Answerphone Messages you've heard, or even done yourself? In college my roomate was a cop, he told me that the worst things you can say on an answering machine were 1) telling them your name, 2) telling the caller your number, 3) and that you aren't at home. Well, here's what I did...
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Just kidding. Do you know of a funnier voice message? Leave it in the comments below! Author: Michael C Michael has over 30 years of executive call center and answering service experience. Post Comment Cancel reply Your email address will not be published.Need some ideas for funny voicemail greetings? Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers:. Our previous post on funny voicemail greetings got so much attention, we thought we'd continue….
You can use any of the ideas for voicemail messages given in this article. Proper voicemail etiquette is extremely important while drafting a message for your phone. Voicemail messages should always be concise and to-the-point so that the caller is not confused by excess information. In the holiday season try to add holiday greetings to your voicemail. Drafting a voice mail message is very simple as long as you know exactly what you want to say and how to say it.
Hi. This is David. I’ve shut the ringers off on my phones and taken a sedative. As soon as I finish this recording I’m going to bed indefinitely. When I wake up I’ll play my messages. Please leave one.
No30: I don't want to bore you with metaphysics, but how do you know this is an answering machine? Maybe it's a dream, or maybe it's an illusion, or maybe YOU don't really exist. One way to find out is to leave a message, and if it's reality, I will call you back.
This article is your complete guide to resetting the voicemail password on an iPhone. Know how to secure your voicemail inbox, with periodic password changes.
17. Hi, this is [your name] at [X Business Name]. Our office is currently closed, but I’ll be back in the office at 9 a.m. tomorrow. Feel free to leave a message or send me an email at [email address], and I’ll get back to you as quickly as possible.
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Help CFC Save the World In the top 200 of over 44,000 teams. All you need is a computer. Now folding with the help of Blazer6. taper, May 26, 2003 "Oh my God, the ringing, THE RINGING! Please, STOP THE RINGING!!! AAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!!!!" *beep* WillJ, May 26, 2003 Joined: Feb 8, 2002 Messages: 10,278 Location: Atlanta, former CSA Irish Caesar, May 28, 2003 Joined: Feb 16, 2003 Messages: 3,098 Location: -4 GMT I don't feel like answering the phone right now. If you leave a message maybe I'll get back to you...or maybe I won't. If you don't hear from me in 72 hours, I decided not to return your call. YNCS, May 28, 2003 Log in with Facebook Your name or email address: Do you already have an account? No, create an account now. Yes, my password is: Home Forums > COLOSSEUM > Humor & Jokes > Search Forums Recent Posts Account Upgrades Civ6 Civ5 Civ4 Civ3 Civ2 Civ1 Modiki Members Notable Members Current Visitors Recent Activity New Profile Posts Search titles only Posted by Member: Newer Than: Search this thread only Search this forum only Display results as threads Style Civilization VI Language English (US) Contact Us Help Home Top RSS Here are some funny answering machine messages to download and record to your answering machine. If you are not Redirected Please Click Here to Continue to the Answering Machine Messages
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LEVEL 6, BRILLIANT SOLITAIRE, SCHEME No 78 PART 2, VIJAYNAGAR, INDORE (M.P.) – 452010 IN P: +91 731 6725516 | M: [email protected] Website: https://activerain.com/blogsview/392498/-free-voicemail-greetings-for-your-cell-phone
38. Thanks for calling [company name]. We’re unable to take your call right now, but leave your details and we’ll call you right back.
The next step is very important and you need to get it right. Say your phone number two times very slowly so the person has enough time to write down your number as they are listening to your message the first time.
A custom phone greeting is a recording that plays automatically when a customer calls. They can be set to play right at the start as a professional welcome, as a voicemail greeting, or even as an away message when you can’t answer.
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But to make them work, you need a business phone system that makes recording, tweaking, and uploading voicemail greetings simple. MightyCall provides such an answer for businesses. With simple, visually-based call flows, adapting your voicemail messages for different seasons, customers, and even different times of day demands no tech knowledge
02Hello, you’ve reached [your name] of [your company/business]. I’m sorry that I’m not available to answer your call now. Please leave your details and a brief message at the tone and I’ll make sure your message reaches the right person. This is the perfect voicemail for a department’s secretary or operatory to let those calling know that their message will be delivered when you get back.
Hi! Jan's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
“So I start by talking as if I answered the phone, like: ‘Hello? It’s Tom, is anyone there?’” Fulton eagerly explained, unaware that no one would ever stay on the line long enough to hear the voicemail he spent his entire Sunday crafting. “But that’s the joke — it’s just a message! Whoever is calling will be talking to no one,” Fulton added, failing to recognize that he was actually talking to no one since his message would never be played back by anyone under any circumstances.
Con un buen mensaje de correo de voz que les permite a las personas saber quién es usted y qué deben hacer para comunicarse con
So long as phones can ring and eyes can see, leave a message, and I’ll get back to thee.
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8. Hi there. This is Joe speaking. I’m home right now, and in a moment I’ll have a decision to make. Leave your name and number and I’ll be thinking about it…
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Avoid These 3 Voicemail Mishaps When Job SearchingAvoid these scenarios with your voicemail during your job search.
It is really important to strike a balance between coming off as too cold, conservative and impersonal with making your message too out there, long or eccentric. If you can create something memorable, it will help engage a caller, or potential client. Go too far off the deep end, and you’ll scare them away
My grandpa (RIP)'s outgoing voicemail message used to give their phone # instead of their name. "Hi, you've reached 555-1234, leave your message at the beep."
17. Hi, this is [your name] at [X Business Name]. Our office is currently closed, but I’ll be back in the office at 9 a.m. tomorrow. Feel free to leave a message or send me an email at [email address], and I’ll get back to you as quickly as possible.
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If I’m your best friend, that’s not a problem. But otherwise, I have no idea if I’m leaving a message for the right person or not. Was that his voice? I couldn’t tell. It kinda sounded like Micheal Cera. Did I accidentally just call Michael Cera’s phone? “Hey if this is Alex, it’s Bryan Allain…call me back. And if this is Michael Cera, loved you in Year One. You may also call me back.”
17. Hi, this is [your name] at [X Business Name]. Our office is currently closed, but I’ll be back in the office at 9 a.m. tomorrow. Feel free to leave a message or send me an email at [email address], and I’ll get back to you as quickly as possible.
7. Could you suggest some voicemail greetings, I’m all out. It would be better if you left it to me as a message after the beep.
You have reached the office of [Business Name]. All of our representatives are currently busy. However, if you choose to do so, you may leave a brief message, including your name, number, or email, and we’ll be sure to get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you for calling [Business Name].
Make it funny! Now not everyone is the funniest comedian, and this time to practice a stand-up routine. No one wants to reach your voicemail just to be greeted with 15 knock-knock jokes. But you can easily add some humor, lighten up the tone a bit and try to leave people with a smile. Of course, keep it light – no dark humor here.
Remember, your professional voicemail greeting recording can be an excellent opportunity to put your best foot forward with customers and promote your business in the process. We have collected 10 of the best voicemail greetings for business applications that we could find.
