Funny Answering Machine & Voicemail Messages In 1935, Willy Müller invented the world’s first automatic answering machine. It was a three-foot-tall machine popular with Orthodox Jews who were forbidden to answer the phone on the Sabbath.
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"Hi. You've reached my voicemail. Please leave your name, number, and a damn good reason why this conversation couldn't be done over text."
Website: https://www.austincc.edu/offices/telecommunications-services/tutorials-and-reference-guides/sample-voicemail-greetings
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08You’ve reached the voicemail of [your business/company]. We are under new management and will be hosting a re-opening on [dates] where you can come and meet the team and have a chance to learn more about our enhanced services and new products. To leave a voicemail message, press the # key and someone from our team will call you back within 24 hours. This voicemail greeting is used to communicate information regarding changes to any business activities. It specifies how customers can communicate and do business with you, during any transition time.
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21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages | Laugh Break FREEAnsweringMachineMessages. FREE. Answering. Machine. Messages. Below is a list of various Answering Machine Messages and messages you can use on your voice mail system. 6thSenseDetectiveAgency.wav AdamSandlerPotSmokers.mp3 Africain.mp3 Afterlife.wav AliceCooper.wav
Please leave your name, phone number, the name of the country you wish to invade, and the secret password. Please leave a message.
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Thank you for calling [LinkedPhone – The Work From Anywhere Business Phone System]. Our office is closed until [Monday, January 25th for the holiday weekend]. If your call is urgent, please contact [Anya at 212-555-1212 or [email protected]]. Otherwise, please leave a message and we’ll get back to you as soon as we return. We value your call. Thank you from everyone at [LinkedPhone].
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Of course, your phone rang because someone wanted to get in touch. They got your voicemail because you were busy or just not there. If you section off a block of your day to check voicemails, let the caller know so they can expect a time for you to return their call. People will leave more details if they know someone will check it later.
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Tonberries enjoy dark, shadowy places lit only by their lamps or dim natural light, and are most often found living in the depths of empty caves or ancient ruins. Though they seem to be peaceful creatures living in large, friendly societies, the presence of an outsider in their territory can make them very angry. tonberry, May 24, 2003 Joined: Feb 22, 2001 Messages: 3,328 Location: Casa de Non Compos Mentis "You have reached the residence of ..... currently we are out hunting other people to cook and fry for dinner. Please leave your phone number and address and we will get back to you." allhailIndia, May 26, 2003 Joined: Sep 4, 2002 Messages: 53 "Hello?.... Wait, i can't hear you.... just a second.... BEEP bige2002, May 26, 2003 One of Dad's friends had an answering machine that said... Hello? * you start saying message* Oh yeah! I'm not here! Please leave a message. *beep* puglover, May 26, 2003 Joined: Nov 10, 2002 Messages: 1,536 Location: NY, NY
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Enjoy the short voice mail greetings that are sure to be funny. Use this at your own risk! This is the operator, what number were you trying to dial?
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You have reached xxx-xxxx. We picked this machine up at a garage sale in “as-is” condition. You can try to leave a message on it, but we are not sure it will be recorded. If we don’t return your call, it means the machine did not work.
Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you. Hello, you have reached the number you have dialed. Please leave a message after the beep. Hi, this is [ your name ]. I’m sorry, I can’t answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone …
As greeting messages should reflect your mood and your personality, they must be recorded with utmost care and with the right choice of words. Here are a few examples which you can make use of while recording your own greeting messages.
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Only a handful of voiceover actors could possibly bring this dramatic message to your voicemail. Click here to hear how it sounds with cinematic, adrenaline pumping music in the background. Save the funny voicemail greetings for your home phone, and let us handle your business phone
The next step is very important and you need to get it right. Say your phone number two times very slowly so the person has enough time to write down your number as they are listening to your message the first time.
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"Originally posted by Katsumoru: And my dad is an astronaut and gave my car a rocket engine.It's not bull****, just too fast to see." "Originally posted by Menace: my dad works for nasa and has a laser detector that reflects the laser back at the cop and makes his gun explode." "Originally posted by ClawHammer: STI's are handed down by god himself, NOTHING is faster then an STI."
“How do you leave an idiot in suspense? Leave a message, and I’ll get back to you… Bye!”
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Creative and funny voicemail messages are great for less formal businesses but may be inappropriate for formal ones. However, if creativity is part of your job description, be sure to sprinkle a dash into your voicemail. Check out these creative and funny voicemail greetings. Top …
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Practice your spiel so you can speak with authority. This lets the caller know how confident, qualified, and prepared you are. The goal is to sound like you’ve been doing this for years, not a few minutes.
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Below are examples of excellent professional voicemail greetings for various situations to help you get started in creating your own perfect greeting! For each, we’ve included helpful tips, a sample voicemail greeting script, and an audio recording. The greetings are grouped by company greetings, department / team greetings, and personal business greetings. These greetings are likely longer than what you would want to use in real life – but our goal is to help you generate ideas to help you create your own!
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1. Hi! You have reached voicemail of (your name), (job title). I am currently away from my desk. Please leave your complete name, contact number and short message after beep and I will be sure to get back to you the time I am available. 2. Good morning. You have reached (company name or office name) of (name).
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No42: A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future.
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What does your greeting have? Is it the automated one or have you personalized it to suit your personality? Many times, when we call our friends, family members, or any other places, all we get is the voicemail. But when that message on the other side of the line is plain, it can really put someone off. You voice message greetings are supposed to be fun, energetic, and witty so that the callers want to pick up their phones and give you a call just so they can listen to the greeting again.
Seems a bit long but should definitely screen out those not truly interested and there’s always the option to press #. I’m going to split test this with my next mailing.
I would be more than happy to discuss your project and your budget, together we can come up with a plan that works for everyone. Budgets and negotiation are often part of the business world.
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You can definitely convert your home, office, or cell phone greetings that show a bit of your unique personality. Depending on what type of calls come in and where you’re receiving them, you too can have fun selecting serious, unique, interesting, or funny voicemail greetings.
Hi! Jan's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
High Voltage 48V 51.2V Solar System Batteries BMS Lithium ion Battery Storage Solar Power Bank Battery Pack Would you like to change your voicemail greetings?Do you need our help?Build a quirky, fun voicemail and share a moment of laughter with your dear before they understand the intent behind you and run to pick you up!Voice mail is not necessarily monotonous or very jazz or trendy.What you want is a balance between the two.Whenever I call someone and their voicemail greeting is playing, it tells me who they are.
It is not only important to know how to script voicemail messages for the office but also for your residence. Many people tend to opt for greetings that are funny because the calls that you get on your phone at home are from friends and family. But if you run a business from home and do not have a separate number for the same, then it may be a good idea to stick to something slightly more generic. You can go with very general message like, Hello, I cannot come to the phone right now, but leave your name and number after the beep, and I will call you back. If you still want to opt for some voice mail messages that are funny, then take a look at the examples below. Hey, I wish I could receive your call right now but you see I am trying to do many things that cannot be done while talking on the phone. Leave your name and number and I will call back. I am sure you thought I was going to answer your call. Well, I am not. Leave me a motivational message and I just may be inspired to call you back. Mom, Dad, I love you and was thinking that for your convenience it would be easier if I had a cellular phone. What do you think about an early birthday present? The worst thing about voicemail messages is that they waste your time with long messages when all you need to say is, Leave a message, we will call back. That is why I have decided to make mine short so that no caller has to suffer listening to long answering machine messages. Bye.
Hello, this is Ron's toaster. Ron's new answering machine is in the shop for repairs, so please leave your message when the toast is done... (Cachunk!)
What does your greeting have? Is it the automated one or have you personalized it to suit your personality? Many times, when we call our friends, family members, or any other places, all we get is the voicemail. But when that message on the other side of the line is plain, it can really put someone off. You voice message greetings are supposed to be fun, energetic, and witty so that the callers want to pick up their phones and give you a call just so they can listen to the greeting again.
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However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller. The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail.
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Otherwise, press 3 and leave your message now. Pressing 3 is optional. This is David. Please leave one. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my friends, you owe me money.
This spam showcases around voicemail phishing Vishingwhich is a type of scam done through Voicemails. I want to be your best friend until I am too old to remember. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back. If your one of your name 's friends, you may also leave a message at the They are perfect alternatives when you want to add some uniqueness to your voicemail. Fourth, wait patiently by your phone; one of us will come to you.
10. Hello, you’ve reached [your company]. We’re sorry to have missed your call. Please leave a brief message including your name, number, and reason for calling and a member of our team will get back to you within one business day.
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Inspirational Quotes. Leave your caller with something meaningful to think about. Mark Twain . The classic adage "when greatness calls" can be used as a funny greeting."When greatness calls, I may not be able to pick up my phone immediately, so leave a message."
2. The “I’m Busy But I’ll Call Back” Greeting. Thank you for calling [insert business name], we are unavailable at the moment right now, probably trying to finish your project.
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7. When you're finished, hang up to exit your voicemail system. When there are no other messages for you to check, or you're otherwise done checking your voicemail, press the red End Call button to exit your voicemail system and hang up the call.
We hope you enjoyed these funny voicemail greetings! Since our business answering service is open 24 hours a day, you’ll never be greeted by a voicemail greeting requesting you to leave a message. However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so we hope these funny …
“Bet you thought I was going to answer the phone. Well, I’m not. On the other hand, I’d really like you to leave me an inspiring message so that I won’t hesitate to call you back as soon as I can. Thanks.”
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Road side cafe; you kill them and we’ll cook them. Leave your order and we’ll get back.
– Thank you for calling (name of the company). If you know the extension number of the person you are trying to reach, you may dial it now. Press 1 for sales. Press 2 for customer service. Press 3 for the billing department. Press 8 to access our fax on-demand system. Press 9 for a company directory, or press 0 for the operator.
I know that in some cases you’re going to have a budget you have to work with for your voicemail greeting ideas. If you are looking to hire a voice talent chances are you have a budget in mind.
Hello! This is [Nick on the West Coast Sales Team at LinkedPhone]. I am currently on vacation until [Friday, April 22nd] with limited access to email. If you require urgent assistance, please contact my lieutenant [Harold Kisp at 415-555-1212 or [email protected]]. Otherwise, please leave a message and I will return your call when I’m back in the office. Thank you and I look forward to chatting!
Dit dit dit dit dit, dut dut. Dit dit dit dit dit, dut dut… After the beep. One of Mr.
This is a true story: my friend's voicemail says, "Hi, you've reached Dave, I'm screening your call." My friend is a recent college graduate, currently searching for a job. While your best friends might think it's funny, anyone else will see a message like this for what it is: unnecessarily rude.
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And also to walk you through some of the nuances and Jedi mind tricks inside…and how it solidly prescreens & elegantly sets the stage for having solid conversations with the right people.
4. Www.makeuseof.com. Thanks A Lot. Professional Greetings For Office Or Work Purposes, Formal Greetings Are Appropriate. Why Not Try Something Different And Get Motivated By The Following Greetings?
08You’ve reached the voicemail of [your business/company]. We are under new management and will be hosting a re-opening on [dates] where you can come and meet the team and have a chance to learn more about our enhanced services and new products. To leave a voicemail message, press the # key and someone from our team will call you back within 24 hours. This voicemail greeting is used to communicate information regarding changes to any business activities. It specifies how customers can communicate and do business with you, during any transition time.
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A word of warning: These greetings will not do you any favors if you're in the midst of a job hunt or work in a conservative industry. Always remember your target personas. If there's a chance they won't appreciate your sense of humor, opt for a straightforward greeting instead.
“Good morning. You’ve reached the voicemail of [your name]. Today is [date]. Please leave me a message with your name and contact information. Oh, and here’s my motivational quote of the day: [read quote].”
