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Hi this is ____'s machine. My name is (pause) well that's not important. (Pause) Ya know it gets very lonely being here all day. (Pause) maybe you could stay and talk. (Pause) please talk to me after the beep, please talk to me after the beep ........... BEEP!!!!!!!!!!!

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"Every generation imagines itself to be more intelligent than the one that went before it, and wiser than the one that comes after it." Lord_all_Mighty, May 22, 2003 Joined: Oct 20, 2002 Messages: 1,506 Location: Too close to Victoria You have reached the home of Tarzan. Sorry i can't answer the phone right now, please leave a message after the AAAHHHHHHAAHHHHHHAAHHHHHHHH Bose, May 23, 2003 Joined: May 16, 2003 Messages: 352 Location: Poland, Warsaw -Robert, answer the phone! Oops, I am Robert! But I'm away now. See? You have to record a message... -You have just reached Browns. We're arguing right now. Record a message: when we'll finish, the one that didn't move out to his/her mother will call you. -Hello, here's Iraq Army HQ. We are out because we want to conquer the USA. When Yankees will kick our butts again, we'll call you.
Written by Aja Frost @ajavuu .

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Funny, the majority of us have a phone on us more hours of the day than not, but actually we’re harder to talk to than ever. On personal calls, and especially business calls, you’re much more likely to reach voicemail than the actual person you’re hoping to engage in conversation.
Hi, you’ve reached (name)’s answering machine. He/she is not in right now, but I’m totally open for suggestions.

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Funny - Humorous voicemail greetings for your amusement and use. Today I've decided to end our friendship, but I realized that you know all of my darkest secrets, so we will have to continue this relationship till the end of time.
A funny voicemail greeting is one of those things that seems like a good idea...until you hear it time and time again. For business and professional life, funny voicemail greetings just doesn't make sense. If you're expecting an important call, or trying to impress someone you certainly won't... 5 Steps to Creating an Audio eGreeting Card December 06, 2011 Juli Durante marketing, tips, greetings

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“First, I am a big fan of the belt and suspender method,” she says. “So, the office would call; if the person is not there, the voice mail message is brief and is followed immediately with an email with all of the details.”

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Hello, and welcome to Answering Machines of the Rich and Famous! (your name here) can’t come to the phone right now, because he’s spending the week in his beautiful summer home on the French Riviera…

  • professional funny voicemail

    It’s the way that people contact you when you are busy with other clients or customers, and cannot get to the phone. It is often the customers or clients first impression of your business or brand, you need to leave a great impression. The worst thing is for a first time caller, or even a returning customer, to get a short blurb like “Leave a message i’ll call you back”. Or, just a beep after the ring.

    1. [FREE] Pre Recorded Answering Machine Messages | HOT. Take a look at these original greetings that will make your friends and family call again and again.
    First, I'd like to pay all your closing costs. When you sell your property. To me, this will save you thousands of dollars because normally when you sell your home, I'm just trying to speak to their subconscious mind, sell your property, sell your home, sell your house to me, sell your house to me. It's not overt to them, but I'm being intentional about not just saying that, but subtly emphasizing those embedded commands.

  • what should my personal voicemail greeting say

    Recording the message yourself doesn’t mean it can’t be done professionally. You can still get studio time with an experienced audio engineer. Studio time can cost $60-$100 per hour, which may or may not come with an engineer. If you need to hire one, their rates are usually $100-$300 an hour. Mind you, their feedback, professional experience, and editing capabilities are typically well worth the extra expense.

    Hi, you have reached (names) voicemail. If you want money or to sell us something, we a) gave at the office, b) already have it, or c) don’t want it. If you are a …
    4. Waiting Message. What callers hear when they enter the waiting queue. Sample Scripts: “All of our agents are currently busy. Please hold and we will answer your call as soon as possible.”

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    2. The Mystery. A mysterious voicemail leaves the listener wondering what the call is about and plays to our fear of loss and FOMO. What if something’s wrong w/ my account?

    “Congratulations! You’ve reached the right person! It’s [your name]. Unfortunately, you’ve called at the wrong time. Please leave a message with all your contact information, and I’ll call you back within 24 hours.”
    Voicemail is necessary when no one can answer the phone. However, a dedicated receptionist can reduce the need for this feature and help people reach a live person. Consider live chat as well if your customers like to reach out online.

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    Free Voicemail & Answer Machine Messages › Discover The Best Education www.freefonefun.co.uk Education Use These Funny Messages To Customise Your Mobile Phone Voicemail.Or Use Them On Your Answer Machine At Home. Save one of these FREE mp3 files to your computer, play it through your computer speakers and record it through your mobile to your customisable voicemail service.

    1. 911, what’s your emergency? Imagine you saying this when a call comes in. Just don’t let the other person say anything and barge in. It will make the other person laugh out loud.
    48. Hello, you’ve reached [name] at [company name]. If you need help with [X reason], please contact [X person/X system] or [visit our website at X and send us an email]. For all other inquiries, please leave your name, phone number, and a message, and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.

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I quite liked the ease of the script; not rushed and overbearing. It is like you are right there talking to me at the kitchen table. Slight grammatical error, it’s ” my wife and I” not “me and my wife.”

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Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future…. A is for academics, B is for beer. So leave a message. After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. Finally get an answering machine. Now how does this thing work? Press record button, I did that, and the light should be on. Hmmmm, I wonder what this button does……. This call may be recorded or monitored for quality and training purposes. Hello you are talking to a machine; I am capable of receiving messages.

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This is an answering machine. This is the nineties. You know what to do. 59. You have reached the number you have dialed. Please leave a message after the beep. 60. This is a boring answering machine message. Leave a message anyway. [Use to keep people from calling at odd hours to hear your latest exciting message.] 61.

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