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Wanna hear a joke? Knock, knock! Hello, and thank you for calling the Starstripe Mental Hospital. If you need to reach a patient, please press 1 and then say their name. If you are delusional, please have either you or your monkey press 2and we will connect you to Mothership.

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A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we’re not here. So leave a message.
These were some of the best and funny voice-mail greetings. Try recording them in your voice mailbox. .

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8. "Hi, you've reached [your name]. I'm unable to come to the phone right now. But if you leave your name, number, and a short message, I'll be sure to call back."
Not sure if this is real or not (and either is snopes, see below). But, it sure is funny. Happy Monday! EDIT: Try this link. This is where I got it from, I didn't try the one below and it apparently doesn't work: Claim: Voicemail message describes a confrontation between a male motorist and four women after a minor traffic accident.

Don't mess with Bible-totin' old ladies.. Read this little explanation and then listen to the voicemail. You just have to laugh with the guy. On a recent Spurs trip, we were asking one of our sponsors who works at Jack in the Box for some funny stories or experiences with the company. The funniest story he had was when an operations manager was late for a meeting and called his boss to tell him he was running late. As he was leaving the voice mail message, he witnessed an accident and went on to provide "play by play" of the incident. After telling us the story, he promised to send us a copy of the voice mail and here it is. This is the actual voice mail message. It was passed along and forwarded so many times within Jack in the Box; it crashed their voice mail server. Origins: In one memorable episode of the 1970s television sitcom All in the Family, Archie Bunker is involved in a minor traffic accident and, eager to cash in on the incident, rushes out and engages a Jewish lawyer to sue the other party. However, after conferring with the defendant's attorney, Archie's lawyer advises him that he has http://www.snopes.com/autos/graphics/fight.gif no case, as the other side's witnesses are too strong. There's an old legal precept, he informs Archie: "You can't beat a station wagon full of nuns." Perhaps Archie Bunker couldn't beat a station wagon full of nuns, but according to a circulating audio clip, an Impala full of Bible-toting middle-aged women could beat (literally!) the motorist who ran into them. We present the recording for your listening enjoyment through [url="http://www.snopes.com/autos/audio/jackbox.mp3"]this (http://home.swbell.net/kf5tv/voicemail.mp3) link. The file size of the clip is over 4MB, so please be patient while it downloads. As to the questions of whether the account given above is an accurate explanation of the origins of this audio clip, and whether the traffic incident described actually took place, we have to leave them as "Undetermined" for now. A inquiry posed to the corporate offices of Jack in the Box restaurants produced the following response: Thank you for your inquiry. The message that has been in circulation is an actual voice mail message. The incident occurred 5-6 years ago in Texas. I'm not sure how the recording got outside the company or if the employee still works for Jack in the Box, but the recording periodically re-surfaces on the radio and the internet. Even if this explanation is accurate (i.e., the clip originated as a message left on a Jack in the Box employee's voicemail), it doesn't preclude the possibility that the accident described never took place, and the recording was just a prank one employee pulled on a co-worker.

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14. Hi, you’ve reached [business name]. We can’t take your call at the moment, but if you leave your name and number, the next available team member will return your call as soon as possible.
It’s frustrating enough to reach a voicemail… being helpful and friendly will go a long way and reduce annoyance!

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Written by Aja Frost @ajavuu

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It was also when I didn’t have to worry about getting “professionals” calling me. If you might have to worry about that, I highly recommend you don’t use these and just enjoy them. The singing messages are about 30 seconds long to sing, which is long for a voice mail, but that’s these lyrics’ “price” of fun.

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    You need to portray a sense of confidence, authority, and respect. The best creative voicemails: This is you know who and if you don't know who, then you have the wrong number Creative Voicemails I'm too sexy for my phone and that's why I'm not home but you can feel free to leave a message.

    I’d like to think we were pioneers in our field, and with the advent of the cell phone now anyone can set up a witty voicemail, and the evidence points to the fact that many people love to amuse us with their funny voicemail greetings. So, below are a compilation of some of the funniest voicemails in the world compiled by an old hand at the game.
    Rates and Pricing About Us Download the Rate Price PDF Contact Us FREE Voicemail Greeting Scripts Free Voicemail Greeting Scripts Funny Voicemail Greetings Business Voicemail Greetings Mailbox Greetings On-Hold Messages Welcome Messages How do I create a custom voicemail greeting? How do I set a custom voicemail greeting on my Android phone? How do I set a custom voicemail greeting on my iPhone? What is a good business voicemail greeting? Blog Español The right voice custom voicemail narration will welcome your corporate and business customers with a professional sound, and on-hold messages are a pleasure to listen to, set to the right voice and music. Make your brand and image stand out on the phone. The right voice custom voicemail narration will welcome your corporate and business customers with a professional sound, and on-hold messages are a pleasure to listen to, set to the right voice and music. I specialize in Recording Creative voicemail greetings, Business Voicemail trees, Messages On-Hold, Greetings with music. I offer a full Voicemail Narration service.

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    No43: You have reached the offices of the planet Zarton. All our agents are busy undermining the governments of the Earth and cannot come to phone at the moment. However, your name and number can be left at the tone and a representative will gladly contact you shortly to arrange for your assimilation into the new order. Long groblint the ultimate blenstron.
    Funny Answering Machine & Voicemail Messages In 1935, Willy Müller invented the world’s first automatic answering machine. It was a three-foot-tall machine popular with Orthodox Jews who were forbidden to answer the phone on the Sabbath. Hi, This is _____’s Cell Phone Message Audition . If you would like to enter your message in our

  • funny voicemail greetings script

    35. Hello, we’re wishing you all a happy [X holiday]. Our office is currently closed so our employees can celebrate with their loved ones. Please leave your name, number, and reason for calling and a member of our team will return your call when we reopen on [X date].

    After hours of brainstorming and countless redos, area man Tom Fulton finally recorded the perfect joke voicemail that no other person will ever bother listening to.
    Movies are the perfect place to find cute love quotes and sayings because every word in the script is carefully crafted for an emotional response. Show off your pop culture knowledge and creativity when you take a famous movie quote and give it a cute relationship twist. Whether you're in a long-distance relationship or just missing your guy, let him know how you feel with a sweet voicemail. If you can't be with your guy, but want to let him know you're thinking of him, a cute voicemail is the perfect solution.

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    You should script out your greetings, rehearse, and find a tone of voice that is reflective of your professionalism and your company’s personality. If applicable, your tone and your message should take into account that certain industries and companies are more conservative than others.

    Consult your network manual for detailed information on changing your voicemail message. If you haven't Got an MP3 Player?? Have a funny Voicemail setup Directly on your mobile network. You ave called the Staines massive Korean pottery symbols Data warehouse concepts with examples Ling ki badhai Provvedimenti dirigenti Surplus electronics sales Zoiper download Plot over picture Related Post Funny voice messages to send Funny voice messages to send Oct 2, 2012 Shaktidal Funny voice messages to send Proudly powered by WordPress | Theme: Newsup by Themeansar. Home SpycamChubbyBathroomStripteasePartyMILFDeepthroatBig Cock Funny Phone Greeting Messages It was a three-foot-tall machine popular with Orthodox Jews who were forbidden to answer the phone on the Sabbath. Then in , the Ansafone, created by inventor Dr. In , PhoneMate introduced one of the first commercially viable answering machines, the Model It weighed 10 pounds and held 20 messages on a reel-to-reel tape. I'm not here right now. When someone calls your business and reaches your voicemail, they should get from you one of 2 basic sentiments: The voicemail greeting should either thank them for their call, or apologize for missing it. The cardinal rule when recording your greeting is to provide the caller with all the information that they need, at least the basic information. Did they reach the right person, and the right business? Can they leave a message? Office hours? Tell how to communicate well or give tips to socialize. Voicemails don't necessarily have to be monotonous or extremely jazzy or funky. Greetign you're looking for is a balance between the two. Whenever I call someone and their voicemail greeting is playing, it tells me a lot about who they are, as a person. Which is why, Messsages got to put a Microchip Update bit of "you" when it comes to voicemail. And the best part about all of this is, since you couldn't come to the phone, at least the callers are having a good time listening to the message. First things first: Okay if this is any of my weirdo friends, then I am sorry I did not give you my new number. So here it is: So call me. Her message says "Whatever unfortunate chain of events has led you to call my number this time! Hi, you have reached names voicemail. If you are a friend, trying to give us money or just want to talk, then leave a message or try my cell phone number. Fool your callers into thinking you're there when you're not. An optional device would be voicemail although for best enjoyment using the answering machine to screen the calls give the best opportunity to hear your caller's reaction. Change your normal greeting for your answering machine voicemail. Simply change your message for your to be "Hello Speak up I can't hear you Your callers will think you're really talking to them, may get mad Funny Phone Greeting Messages they realize they've been duped, and may leave you a few choice words of there own! As I said, this is best when you can use your answering machine to screen the calls and listen and maybe talk to your victims. Before we get into business voicemail greetings, here are some interesting facts about voicemail messages to think about. Let the customer know whose voicemail they have reached. What business, department, or person are they leaving a message for? Let Phond customer know when they can expect a return call. Follow through with a call back! List any additional options that are available to your customer.
    Here are a few voicemail message examples you can record if you have the opportunity to leave a professional sounding message, while still having a bit of fun. Before choosing one of these options, be sure your company allows for a little creativity. If you work in a strict professional position, theses options might not be the best for you.

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1. Hello, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m currently unavailable, but leave your name and number and I’ll return your call as soon as I can.

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When I get back, and can listen to what you say, I will call you back but on a less hectic day! Help me please!!!! Just speak into this box, when it makes that weird sound, and I will be able to get out and call you back! This is name speaking. He donates to charity through its office and do not want their picture taken. So how about an early birthday present? These were some of the best and funny voice-mail greetings. Try recording them in your voice mailbox.

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