Hi. I am probably home, I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like. Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you.
1. 911, what’s your emergency? Imagine you saying this when a call comes in. Just don’t let the other person say anything and barge in. It will make the other person laugh out loud.
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The first call is from a man that looked in the yellow pages under the pest control category and decided that we looked like the right people to call to report that 3 men were throwing a dead goat into a dumpster.
Practice your spiel so you can speak with authority. This lets the caller know how confident, qualified, and prepared you are. The goal is to sound like you’ve been doing this for years, not a few minutes.
2. "Hi, you've reached [name] at [company]. If you need a quick response, please shoot me an email at [insert email address] and I'll be in touch by EOD tomorrow.
About the Author: Angie Bailey is an eternal optimist with an adoration of all things silly. Loves pre-adolescent boy humor, puns, making up parody songs, thinking about cats doing people things and The Smiths. Writes Catladyland, a cat humor blog, Texts from Mittens (originated right here on Catster) and authored whiskerslist: the kitty classifieds, a silly book about cats wheeling and dealing online. Partner in a production company and writes and acts in comedy web series that features sketches and mockumentaries. Mother to two humans and three cats, all of which want her to make them food. Tags: Behavior, Cats And Tech, Catster Home, Humor, Lists, Offbeat Subscribe View Sep 21 Sep 20 Sep 17 Sep 15 Load More Follow on Instagram Annie Butler Shirreffs Jackie Brown Shopping Guide Advertise Events Photo Booth Contact the Editors Meet the Team Subscribe My Account Pay My Bill Customer Service Privacy Policy DO NOT SELL MY INFORMATION
Hello, and welcome to Answering Machines of the Rich and Famous! Please leave your name, telephone number, and a brief message in a voice similar to mine, and your call will be returned as soon as humanly possible. This is Chris. This is his refrigerator. Hi, you have reached …. Please leave your name, phone number and a message and if we like it we will return your call.
“Hello, you’ve reached the Marketing Department at [XYZ Company]. All of our team members are currently working with other clients to [insert goal] and are unable to take your call.
No1: Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
“Hello, it’s me. I was wondering if after all these years you’d leave a message at the beep. Hello, can you hear me? I’m in California dreaming about the message that you’ll leave. Hello from Ellen.”
No48: You have reached 234-1243. This is an answering machine. This is the nineties. You know what to do.
Please be advised that these messages are posted here because I thought they was amusing and I thought that others might enjoy them also. If you are one of the people that left one of these messages and are offended by seeing it here just let me know and I'll take it down.
“Hi! You have reached [your business]. All of our staff are currently busy helping other callers. We understand how valuable your time is, and rather than keeping you on hold, we will make sure to call you back.Be sure to leave us a detailed message with your name and number. We will return your call within two business hours. Thanks!”
Website: https://www.shrm.org/ResourcesAndTools/hr-topics/technology/Pages/Personal-Cellphone-Privacy-at-Work.aspx
3. The Value. Only your mom will call you back for something you want. Everyone else wants to know what it’s worth their time. At Factor 8 we like the term, SWIIFT℠ So, What’s In It for Them?
Different businesses may require different types of greetings. This is the ultimate list that can work for a wide array of company messages.
Hi. If this is my parents, I need some money you guys. If this is my friend, I’ll get you your money. If this is a hot girl, DO NOT listen to a word I said before. I got plenty of money for you.